


We rise from those who broke us.

by BornofFlame



Series: Healing is chaotic, but so are we. [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: AHAHAHAHA, Abusive Relationships, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Homophobia, Human AU, I rated it teen so I could swear, M/M, Nightmares, Platonic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Platonic Logan & Remy, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Promise, Selectively Mute Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Swearing, Temporary Death, Theorized Orange side, and i realized that theres gonna, aroace emile picani, be some non consensual kissing, chaotic Sam, for the next few chapters, haha I return, hey hey hey i didn't tag rosleep as a tag, i was writing out the plot, i'll keep adding tags as i go, it's not that long, like three and a half minutes of being dead, maybe some making out, not saying who tho, roman's parents are mean, roommates au, sequel fic, sorry virgil and roman, there will be blood - Freeform, there's gonna be alot of kissing, why do i have to constantly hurt you two, yall are gonna hate me but the end of this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:20:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 34
Words: 38,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25030801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BornofFlame/pseuds/BornofFlame
Summary: Somewhere in the world, there are six people that are completely unrelated to you, but somehow share the exact same DNA structure as you. Considered as carbon copies, having all six of your personas alive at once is a one in a 200,900,000,000 chance.By some horrible coincidence, a group of college roommates somehow have found their ‘other selves’, each one with a distinct personality and name.It's been a year since the group met in that fateful condo, and it's been seven months since Remus last hurt any of them and as they'll learn, healing comes slow and so does a well made revenge.Chaos ensues.
Relationships: Analogical - Relationship, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Moceit
Series: Healing is chaotic, but so are we. [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1812676
Comments: 209
Kudos: 140





	1. Reunited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back dorks! If you haven't read 'Oh my gosh, they were roommates' go back and read it, you've come too far.
> 
> I love you all and please be aware that yes, the first fic was completely published in two weeks, but I am participating in a lil somethin-somethin called LadyNoir July for the fandom: Miraculous Ladybug, so this fic will take a bit of the backburner, while my LadyNoir will take center stage.  
> but don't worry, I'm not going to forget about Logan, Virgil, Janus, Roman, Patton, Remy, Sam, and Jess!

Logan got out of the airport’s check out gate and ran straight into Virgil’s arms, drawing in the smell of green apple and cinnamon as they hugged.

“I missed you.” Logan mumbled as Virgil rocked them side to side.

“That is  _ satisfactory _ .” Virgil laughed and rested his chin on top of Logan’s head.

“Did you look that up before Remy drove you over?”

“Hmmmm? Yeah. Did anyone tell you that your shampoo smells really good?” Virgil asked as they broke apart and he grabbed Logan’s bag.

“I was about to tell you the same.” Logan intertwined his hand with Virgil’s as they wandered through the airport, catching up on what had happened over the past three months.

“So you're telling me that Janus dared Sam to climb to the top of the condo, and she  _ actually  _ did it?” Logan shook his head in disbelief and Virgil nodded.

“She’s really chaotic now, says that since it’s her last year in college she has to ‘try new things’ and so she took him up on the challenge.”

“Has Remy gotten her to drink yet?”

“No. She refuses to break.”

“Surprising.” Logan commented as they finally walked out of the airport, looking for the beater car that Remy had purchased.

Virgil pointed at the car and they stepped off the curb, looking both ways before they crossed the street, albeit quite nervously.

Logan understood his apprehension. It had gotten harder over the months for him to take the step of the curb and cross  _ any _ street, even if there weren’t any cars in sight.

Logan didn’t want to admit it, but the nightmares of that night refused to leave his head and there were the tiniest things that would throw him into full flashback, to the blood and the snow and just everything. 

He couldn’t even go out of his house for the fourth of July and celebrate, the sounds of the fireworks exploding putting him on edge. 

But it was a new school year and so he shook off the thoughts and snapped back to the present.

He pulled gently at Virgil’s hand and guided them over, where Remy rolled down the window.

“How was your summer, you nerdy slut?”

“It was pretty good.”

“Glad to hear it girl, get in before I drive off.” Remy popped the trunk and Logan helped Virgil unceremoniously dump his bag in the back before they got in the car.

“Are we still picking up Roman from the bus depot?”

“Yeah, but I was considering just ditching him there. He hasn’t been answering any of my calls and now I’m upset.” Remy pouted as he turned the car onto the freeway, the beater rattling as he shifted.

“Is this car a manual?” Logan stuck his head forward as Remy shifted again, it obvious that he had no idea what he was doing.

“Yes, shut up, I know I can’t drive.” Remy gritted his teeth and the clutch popped, launching the car forward with a burst of speed.

“I know how to drive stick.” Logan blurted out.

“Thank God. I’m pulling over.”

One switch later, Remy was stuck in the back, while Logan drove smoothly and Virgil played a game on his phone, which Logan noted, had gained a new crack in the screen protector.

“So did you two hang out at all during the summer?” Logan asked as he shifted lanes, being careful not to break the car more than it already was.

“Nah.” Remy said as he lounged in the back.

“Not really. I have other things to do.” Virgil said mutedly.

Logan sighed. The conversation that he’d been hoping to have was going nowhere and as he pulled off the freeway (finally) he attempted to jump start the conversation.

“Did you two even talk?”

There was a massive pause, and after a moment, Virgil spoke up.

“Once.”

“Did something happen?”

“I got drunk.” Remy said suddenly, the words tumbling out quickly.

“And then he tried to kiss me.” Virgil added embarrassedly.

“I wasn’t drunk enough to forget it.” Remy interjected.

“And so we decided to avoid each other the entire summer because it was awkward.” Virgil concluded, face burning a bright red.

Logan thought about it for a moment and then started laughing, which completely threw off the other two.

“That’s, now that’s the story of the summer!” He wheezed as he pulled into the bus depot’s parking lot, parking perfectly.

“You don’t hate me?” Virgil’s relief was palpable and this only made Logan laugh harder, tears streaming down his face as he cried.

“Of course not! If anything, it’s the exact opposite and I love your emo dorky self even more.”

Virgil sagged inward and from the back, Remy sighed as well, until Logan twisted around to glare at him.

“You, on the other hand…”

_ “Oh no.”  _

Logan’s glare shifted into a shit eating grin that was more commonly reserved for the likes of Remy and Janus and he burst into laughter again. “Sorry, I had to.”

“Girl, I’m okay with jokes, but when you’re scary buff, like how did a twig nerd like you get so buff-- and then I know that you can’t sell a joke to save your life, my soul left my body.” Remy choked out, and Logan turned back towards Virgil, who had gone deathly pale.

“I didn’t think you could tell jokes either.”

“Let’s go get Roman.” Logan opened his door and got out, nearly breaking the car door off as he shut it.

“Remy, how much did you get this beater for?”

“Like 300 dollars and a Tequila coupon for the bar.”

Logan shook his head and then they all wandered up to the terminal, waiting for Roman to either show up or text them.

As if that was the cue, Logan’s phone buzzed.

RoRo: I’m here.

LoLo: Why didn’t you text Remy that?

RoRo: He’s here?!?

LoLo: What is up with you two?

RoRo: Nothing.

RoRo: I see u.

Logan looked up to see Roman lugging a duffle bag behind him, wearing his iconic bomber jacket and not exactly looking at them as he came over.

“Logan! Virge! Remy, It’s great to see all of you!” He dropped his duffle bag on the ground and gave Remy what Logan noted as a tense kiss before breaking away to face his roommates.

“How’s the hand Emo Nightmare?”

“Never been better.” Virgil gave him a smile and they hugged. Roman turned to Logan and stuffed his hands in his jeans pockets and flashed him a smile that Logan could tell as slightly tense and slightly desperate.

“And how’s the resident Brainiac?” 

“I am well. How was the bus ride down?”

“Horrible, but way cheaper than a flight, so it was worth it. Where’s everyone else?”

“Oh, Janus and Patton have yet to come up for air since they were reunited after a  _ shocking _ two weeks away from each other, so it’s just the calvary.” Virgil gestured to the group and Roman frowned.

“Cool.”

“Let’s go, I don’t think that Remy’s car will start if we spend any more time lollygagging.”

“Rude. You could’ve gotten a taxi.” Remy pushed his sunglasses down and stuck his tongue out at Logan, who rolled his eyes and Virgil, who hissed.

“Then off into the sweaty Florida sunset we go!” Roman stated grandly as he picked up his bag and motioned for Logan to lead the way.

It was a pretty good reunion in Logan’s honest opinion.

He just wasn’t quite sure if Roman thought it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, if you're one of my regulars, (looking at you hammyboi, mushroomwings and thisisloki) you know the drill.
> 
> everyone else, comments and kudos?


	2. can't you see that it's just raining (metaphorically), there ain't no need to go outside.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Remy talk.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hey hey
> 
> I felt really inspired to write this chapter, so here!  
> I hate building Ikea furniture and I'm sure that Remy does too.

Roman followed Remy into his apartment, nearly colliding with several large boxes as he dodged around the clutter.

“Sorry about the mess babe, but I don’t know how to set up Ikea furniture and so now everything’s just stuck in boxes. Like right here, a very nice couch, but it’s just a box.”

“It’s a very nice box.” Roman said stiffly.

Remy didn’t seem to pick up on his mood and continued to chatter as Roman helped him move all the boxes so that they’d have a space to work with as they built the couch and other things that Remy had purchased over the summer.

“So why all the new stuff?” Roman stabbed a kitchen knife in one of the boxes, cutting away the tape and pulling out the instructions.

“Oh, the landlord said that she was furnishing a new apartment and so the decor of that one would better match the furniture of this one and so she gave me like ten thousand and told me to get new beds and a couch and a table, you know, the works for this apartment.”

“How long have you been without a table?”

“Two months.”

“ _ Remy. _ ” Roman finally laughed and Remy took off his sunglasses, both of them feeling like the tension from earlier had snapped.

“I ate my ramen on the floor, at least it gave me a reason to keep it clean.”

“That’s not even funny.”

“Well, as the guys at the bar said: ‘if the floor’s clean, then the store’s clean’ and I live by that philosophy.” Remy opened the instructions upside down and shook his head, face morphing into a frown. “I can’t read swedish to save my life.”

“You should’ve taken a language class in college. And also, it’s upside down.” Roman tossed Remy a bag of screws and a few tools, taking the instructions back so that when the couch was assembled it wouldn’t immediately collapse in on itself.

“My hero.” Remy said dramatically as he pulled out a cross beam, tossing it onto the rug without a second glance. “Always here for me.”

“No I wasn’t.”

“You can hardly blame yourself for that Princey.”

“I could have run, or faced the truth Rem.” Roman handed Remy another cross beam, which was added to the ever growing pile of Ikea stuff that made no sense.

“Hmm, I’d like to see a crazy girl like you try to run. Seems kinda, alluring.” Remy held up a cushion and shrugged as Roman tried not to choke on his next words.

“Don’t ever use alluring in that context again.”

“No promises.”

“Come on, I need you to help me with this couch and then the table that you desperately need and then we can assess the damage.”

Three misbuilds, two pillow fights and one major collapse later, the couch and table were standing, for better or for worse. Roman held out his fist for Remy to bump and he did, a self righteous smile on his face.

“I told you that I could do it.”

“You literally refused to build your couch for three months because I wasn’t here.” Roman teased as he dragged the cardboard boxes to the front door, packing peanuts scattering across the tile of the apartment.

“You’re making a mess.”

“I wouldn’t be making a mess if you had set these up two months ago.”

“I would have set these up two months ago if you were here.”

Just like that, the tension was back. The massive elephant in the room that neither of them wanted to address.

It was Roman who broke first.

“We have to discuss this Remy.”

“No.”

“You’re acting like a child.” Roman crossed his arms and Remy mimicked him, snapping his sunglasses down to hide his eyes.

“So? I still love you and I’m willing to lie.”

“For you it’s not lying. I was able to keep.. us on the down low because of all the shit Remus was putting everyone through, but now that he’s finally getting the help he needs, Mom and Dad are starting to notice. I could barely get any clearance to move back to the condo, and I want to still have friends at least!” Roman tried to keep still as he was talking, but before the words were out of his mouth, his hands were flailing as he described the problem for what seemed like the millionth time to Remy.

“I don’t care how homophobic your parents are Ro, and if you can’t go back to New York for any reason, then you always have a place to crash here.” 

“Maybe I don’t want to crash at Remy! Have you  _ ever  _ thought of what this is doing to me! To us?”

During the fight, they had somehow stalked closer to each other, and now, Roman’s face was inches from Remy’s.

He wiped away some of the angry tears that had come up and took a step back, chest heaving.

“I said that I was willing to be friends with you.”

“And I said that that would hurt you even more than what’s already going on. I see this as going two ways Princey. One, we call it quits, you pretend that you’re straight and that it was all just a phase or  _ whatever _ and we’re constantly wanting each other back.” Remy let out an exasperated sigh and continued, “Or we can face this together, aw shit, I’m sounding like a sappy romance- and we tell your parents to go suck it and we ignore what they think of us.”

“That’s childish.”

“We had a pillow fight while building a couch. We’re children. But I respect your choice, even though it kills me. Emotionally that is.” Remy turned away and when he spoke again, his voice was cold, no implications of teasing to be heard.

“Get out.”

“Remy…”

“Did you not hear me the first time? Get out before I physically kick you out myself.”

Roman turned to the door and slipped out, walking down the dingy hall to the stairwell before he changed his mind and went to the elevator, riding it down the three stories that it took to get to the main level.

Once he was outside the complex, he sat down on the curb and buried his face into his arms, crying silently.

Everything was supposed to be perfect and he was supposed to be up there with Remy right now, having a great night, no longer burdened by what Remus had done to any of them, he couldn’t harm them anymore--

“Hey Ro.”

Roman’s face shot up to see that Sam’s sister was standing next to him, her pixie cut longer than when he remembered her and dyed a bright green.

“It’s Jess right?” He sniffed before hiding his face again. “What are you doing here?”

“My apartment is in this complex. I saw you crying through the window.” 

Roman heard her step down and sit next to him, one tiny arm coming to wrap around him.

“So you and Remy are caput?”

“Yeah…”

“That sucks. I remember when my first boyfriend dumped me. I was thirteen, but still.”

“You had a boyfriend?”

“Once. My sister kinda scared off anyone else after that. I did date a lot though. There was this one girl, she was kinda sweet…” Jess trailed off and poked Roman in the shoulder gently. “Do you wanna talk about Remy?”

“Not really. I don’t. Sorry.”

“There’s no need to be sorry Ro. I’m happy just to keep you company.” Jess rested her head on Roman’s shoulder and they sat on the curb like that, until the street lamps turned on all around them with a click, and the cool Florida air began to sink down like some forgotten dream.

"I should be going home." 

"Yeah, me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments and kudos to feed the hungry author pls.


	3. Comfort is a packet of Oreos.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil is a gay mess.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've never kissed anyone, can you tell? haha, I can't ever land a date, message me if you think that this biromantic ace is dateable, haha, i'm not lonely i swear, haha, totally not writing fanfiction to fill the void, haha
> 
> so there's some really depressing stuff coming up, and I should probably just come out and say it right now, because it's mainly going to have to do with Virgil and Roman this go around, because I've been foreshadowing pain since chapter two of the 'oh my gosh they were roommates' but I digress
> 
> next chapter we meet Dr. Emile Picani, aka, the worst Practical Applications professor that a Humanities and Psychology major can have.

Virgil practically collapsed backwards, his eyes flashing open briefly as Logan pushed them so that they were sitting on the bed, not breaking their kiss for even a second.

He’d forgotten about how good of a kisser Logan was.

To be completely honest, he’d forgotten a lot about Logan. Like how when his hair hit the light just right, Virgil could still see the blue from when he’d bribed Sam to dye the entire top. Or how he still didn’t quite get jokes and how Virgil had to remember to tone down his use of slang, and how he liked the cleverness of puns but wouldn’t be caught dead  _ ever _ saying one, the stars forbid.

He was glad that his boyfriend was back.

Logan was pulling at his hood, drawing Virgil ever closer as they kissed, and it was only a knock at the door that caused them to break apart hastily, Logan adjusting his tie with a burning face as Virgil jumped up to answer the door.

“Movie Night!!!!!” Patton squealed as he barged in, either not reading the mood or just flat out ignoring it as he flopped down on top of Virgil’s grey comforter, nearly knocking Logan in the face as he did so.

“I don’t have a T.V. in here Patton.” 

“I know! But Janus and I made popcorn for you and kettle corn for LoLo and I even brought out my hidden Oreos for Roman.” Patton stood back up and pulled Logan with him, the other hand reaching for Virgil, like a parent reaching out for a child.

Virgil let Patton grab his hand and let himself get dragged downstairs, knowing that at least there was going to be popcorn, so it was worth it.

He wasn’t expecting to see that Roman was on the couch already, with a tear streaked face. Janus had one arm wrapped around the theater loving dork and Virgil’s face fell as he went and sat next to him.

“What happened?”

“N...Nothing.” Roman stuttered and Virgil’s brow furrowed before he also wrapped an arm around him.

“Ro, if it was Remy, I’ll come at him with a crowbar.” Virgil promised, which coaxed a broken laugh/sob from him.

“It wasn’t Remy.” Janus supplied quietly. Virgil cast a confused look at Logan, who’s expression mirrored his, so that was absolutely  _ no help _ whatsoever.

“His parents are homophobes.” Patton spit out, normally cheerful demeanor gone as he opened a sleeve of Oreos and held them out.

Virgil stiffened. 

“Not you too.” He muttered as Logan joined them on the couch, a worried look on his face as well.

“How did they not notice that you were dating all of last year?”

Roman sighed as he wiped at his eyes. “Remus.”

There was a collective nod from the group.

“You know that makes sense.”

“It really does add up.”

“I wouldn’t put it past them.”

“I’m sure that none of us will abandon you for being gay.” Virgil grinned lopsidedly. “It’d be kinda weird if we kicked you out, none of us being straight and all.”

_ “Virgil.” _ Logan chastised as Roman let out another watery laugh.

“Thanks guys. I feel bad for crying about it again, princes are supposed to be strong in the face of danger and face everything head on, but I just feel small.”

“Well, how about a movie marathon to fix that?” Patton asked, clearly trying to keep the mood light.

Virgil felt Roman perk up at this, and he removed his arm, which had fallen slightly asleep from being wrapped around the theater nerd.

“Can we watch disney?”

“Whatever you want kiddo!”

Once they had all settled back, with Patton forgoing sitting next to Janus so that he could continue to comfort Roman and Virgil resting comfortably with his head on Logan’s chest, listening to his heartbeat more than the film.

Without even realizing it, he’d fallen asleep.

Virgil hadn’t had a dream that he remembered, not for a long time, and surprisingly, tonight was no different.

Okay, technically, he’d had the coma dreams, but Virgil had decided that those didn’t count, because everything that had happened in those dreams was happening in real time.

When he did wake up, he and Logan were still on the couch, but the T.V. was off and the living room was dark and quiet.

Oh, Patton had so set them up for this.

Virgil gently tried to pull away from Logan, but Logan’s arms tightened slightly, and he let out a soft sigh, which made Virgil feel warm inside.

So he snuggled closer, knowing that his neck would be really sore in the morning, but it was worth it.

…

_ “Shhh, you’re gonna wake them up!” _

_ “Come on, these photos are so much better than last time Virge fell asleep on the couch.” _

_ “Yeah, cause that was before he was dating Logan. Janus, let me stand on your shoulders or something.” _

_ “We used a ladder last time Patton.” _

Virgil opened his eyes groggily, squinting up at Roman’s phone.

“What the hell do you mean by a ladder last time?” He grumbled as he shifted, accidentally ribbing Logan, who sat up and tried to rub at his eyes, hand colliding with his glasses.

“Roman, we agreed not to tell him.”

Virgil looked up at Roman, trying hard not to panic. “Did you take pictures of me without me knowing?”

“Yeah, Logan totally still has a copy, I deleted mine after a while, but he kept his as a wallpaper.”

“Roman!” Logan’s voice was sharp and Virgil sat up fully, tossing aside the blanket that had somehow been put on them overnight.

“I have to see this photo Logan, what if I look terrible, or I--” anxiety and paranoia started to bubble up in his throat and Virgil could feel the panic rolling in like a thunderstorm in the desert. 

“You looked at peace in it.” Logan pulled out his phone and unlocked it, showing Virgil the photo.

Virgil took the phone from Logan, confused. “Out of all the photos you own, this is the one that passed the test to be your background?”

“I rarely change anything about what I do, why would my background be any different?”

“Shoot, getting philosophical this morning.” Virgil stood and stumbled forward, nearly crashing into Roman as his vision went black temporarily.

“And that’s why you need more iron in your diet.” Logan called from his position on the couch as Roman reached out to steady Virgil.

“Loss of consciousness is just weakness leaving the body.” Virgil muttered as he righted himself.

“No it’s not!” Logan yelled indignantly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment you coward.


	4. The doctor is IN! (with his own theme song too:)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton and Janus meet Dr. Emile.  
> Chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PICANI  
> PICANI  
> PIC  
> PIC  
> PICANI!
> 
> hi yes I'm still alive, thx for asking. someone on one of my discord groups called someone else sam and I thought that they were addressing me even though my name's not sam and my real name isn't anything close to sam.  
> I pulled an all nighter because ptsd be that way. happy fourth of july for all you people who celebrate random days on a calendar.

Patton sat excitedly next to Janus, one hand tapping a pencil against the part of the chair that folded out to a flimsy desk.

The lecture hall was echoey and the sign on the door proclaimed that it belonged to a Dr. James Attawood, and from what Patton had read on RateMyProfessor.com, he was widely considered to be the best teacher in the Humanities and Psychology arena.

So when the boisterous singing started to float down the hall, he paused his tapping and grinned at Janus.

“I’m so excited!”

“I know sweetie, you’ve been saying that all morning.” Janus closed one hand around Patton’s as the chatter in the room slowly died down as the singing got louder.

“RATATATATATATATATATAAAAAAAAAAAA! DADADABUMMMMMMMMMM! BAMMMMMBAMMMBUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!”

One hand connected to a tan sweater was stuck through the door, followed by a leg as the singing grew louder.

“RAATATATATATATATAA-- _ wheeze _ \-- RATATATAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

The professor finally came into view, his lilac hair bouncing as he made his way to the desk and jumped on top of it.

“HELLO CLASS!”

Crickets.

“I SAID HELLO CLASS!” 

There were a few muttered hellos and this seemed to satisfy the professor, who jumped down from his desk and leaned against it. He took the wireless microphone off the desk and turned it on.

“Now as you may _now_ know, I’m not Dr. James Attawood. He’s been fired for a few reasons, but I think that stabbing one of his students was the final kicker!”

Patton looked at Janus, who was chewing his lip nervously as the professor spoke.

“I’m sure you all are all worked up in a terrible tizzy as to who I am, but look no further for the secret tunnel, because I’m Dr. Emile Picani, here to educate you and offer free therapy during my office hours, which are from five pm to nine pm on weekdays!”  
A girl in the back near Patton raised her hand and Dr. Picani pointed at her enthusiastically and waved for her to come down.

“And what’s your name?”  
“Victoria.”

“And your question?”

“Will Dr. Attawood be coming back?”

“That’s a solid no! You can deal with me as your Practical Applications prof, or you can walk out that door right there!”

The girl, Victoria, blushed a crimson before squeaking out a no and going back to her seat. Dr. Picani smiled, no doubt waiting for anyone else to ask a question before shrugging and continuing his lesson.

One very fast class later, Patton could tell that he was going to like Dr. Picani. He was loud and went off on tangents, but he really seemed to have his students best interests at heart.

So once most of the students had bolted, Patton gave Janus a quick goodbye kiss on the cheek before carefully making his way down to where Dr. Picani was pulling a few Funko!Pop figures out of a small box and placing them on his desk.

“Dr. Picani?”

“Oh Patton, you can call me Emile!”

Patton blinked twice and then a smile broke across his face. “You know my name!”

“I made it a priority to memorize everyone’s names.”

“Then why didn’t you know Victoria’s?”

“She transferred in this morning.” Emile ran a hand through his hair and put down his box of figurines. “So, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Do you do therapy for people with PTSD?”

“I do therapy for anyone who feels like they need it. Group therapy, couples, one on one, why do you ask?”

“Well, back in December, my friends and I went through a really traumatic experience and now one has these triggers and another one broke up with his boyfriend and--”

“Patton, slow down buddy.” Emile took off his glasses and cleaned them, putting them back on. “Were any of your friends hurt in the accident, other than emotionally?” 

“One of my friends, he had to get surgery and his hand still doesn’t work like everyone else’s.”

“Ah, I see. May I take a stab at your friend’s names?”

Patton shrugged and Emile reached out a hand to rest on his shoulder, a comforting weight, grounding Patton to the moment.

“Is this a Virgil that you’re talking about?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sure that he’ll be fine seeing me. That’s what I’m here for Patton. To help you learn and grow, whether it’s emotionally or mentally.”

Patton nodded gratefully and the sound of the door opening caused them both to look and see the start of Picani’s next class trickling in.

“I’ll see you around Patton?”

“See you around Dr. Picani.” Patton squared his shoulders and walked out of the lecture hall, nearly colliding with Sam, who was on her way in.

“Hi Pop!” She dodged around him and Patton couldn’t help but laugh.

“Heyo Sam! I haven’t seen you in forever!” he held out his arms for a hug and she obliged, giving him a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“What brings you to this side of campus? I thought that you were a stats major!”

“Oh, I’m cashing in on a few social sciences classes and RateMyProfessor said that Attawood was one of the best, so free class, am I right?” she laughed and flicked a long strand of pink and brown hair back behind her.

“Oh, Attawood doesn’t teach anymore, but I think that you’ll like Dr. Picani.”

_ “PICANI?”  _ Sam shrieked, 

“You know him?”

“Yeah, he’s like, _ the _ most eccentric therapist you can find. And he’s actually good? I went once and we seriously just vibed for forty five minutes straight. Anyway, I’m gonna go in right now so we can chat, I’ll see you around?” Sam gave him another hug before running inside the lecture hall, leaving Patton alone again.

Patton pulled out a crumpled piece of paper.

Next class was some science class that he’d apparently need in order to get his Humanities degree so that he could go onto either education or social work.

Patton shoved the paper back into his pocket--no wonder it was so crumpled-- and went to his next class with a smile on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment you coward.  
> picani would want you to leave me a kudo.
> 
> I feel like Patton and Emile would really hit it off because they both seem like parental figures with that childish wonder. And so Patton gets a best friend mentor thingie!
> 
> i know i say that i hate writing in patton pov, but i enjoyed this chapter.


	5. don't drop the glass Virgil.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janus works on a project.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8vpVYMIVzW8
> 
> watch this, then read the chapter.  
> first vine, second part is Logan and Virgil, second vine is Patton and Roman.

Janus needed a glue stick.

It’d been years since he had had a project that required  _ glue _ of all things and as he knocked on Roman’s door and got no answer, he debated just going in and stealing one.

He didn’t though and moved to the next most likely person to have a glue stick, which was Patton, but Patton’s door was closed and he had hung a hotel’s ‘do not disturb’ sign on the handle.

Janus sighed and went to Virgil’s room, rapping his knuckles lightly on the door.

“Come in.” Came the dual chorus of Logan and Virgil and Janus opened the door and stuck his head in.

Logan was sitting on the floor, reading a book and Virgil was on the bed, lying flat on his stomach as he did something on a computer. Neither of them looked up.

“Do you have a glue stick?”

“In the drawer on the left.” Virgil said and Janus realized what looked so off about him.

He wasn’t wearing his signature sweatshirt or even a long sleeved shirt. Janus slipped inside, trying hard not to stare at the razor scars that were evenly spaced up his arms as he stepped over Logan’s legs and opened the drawer, briefly noticing a polaroid as he grabbed the glue stick.

“Thanks Virge.” 

“What?”

“For the glue stick.”

“Yeah, no problem. Give it back to Patton once you’re done, I stole it from him.” Virgil glanced up and flashed him a grin before going back to his computer, seemingly uncaring that Janus had seen anything at all.

Weird.

Janus shrugged it off and went back downstairs, clutching the glue stick in one hand and his cane in the other as he made his way to the table to where his project was scattered across.

Magazine clippings and colored tissue littered the surface and he sat down, pulling the construction paper that he was gluing the magazine photos on.

A collage of college. Dr. Picani’s assignments were crazy and Janus really wanted to know how gluing photos from magazines would help him in the real world, but cutting out tissue paper and gluing it down was slightly cathartic.

There was a crash and cursing from upstairs and he ignored it, even as Logan came down holding a hand that was dripping with blood and Virgil followed closely with a first aid kit from the bathroom.

“What on Earth were you two doing up there?” Janus glued a magazine clipping to his poster as Logan started to run his hand under the water.

“Reading.”

“Working on an essay.”

“And you two somehow came out injured in the process?”

“It’s a hazard whenever I’m around Virgil.” Logan muttered as he pulled out a fistful of paper towels and pressed them to the cut as he wandered over and sat at the table. 

“Don’t get blood on my project.” Janus warned as he pulled away a few photos of him and Patton that he had had printed out, to add a ‘personal touch’ that Dr. Picani had asked for.

Virgil had sat down too, and he was in the middle of putting Neosporin on Logan’s hand when he froze, hand shaking.

“What’s wrong?” Janus put down the glue stick, and Virgil shook his head as he stood and left silently, leaving Logan and Janus alone.

Logan looked at Janus helplessly and Janus sighed before standing and moving seats so that he could finish cleaning up the hand.

“Do you know what caused that?”

“No. He has more triggers since the.. you know, and I’m not sure when we’ll find the extent of them.” Logan grimaced as Janus applied more Neosporin and wrapped a Band Aid around the injury.

“Well, Patton invited me to join him in a group therapy thing that Picani advertised as his office hours, you could come too, I’m already planning on dragging Roman over.”

Logan seemed to think this over before shaking his head. “I’d have to talk to Virgil about it, but I’ll get back to you about it.”

Janus nodded and Logan left, leaving him to his project and a bunch of Band-Aid wrappers to take care of.

He sighed and picked up a photo of the group in their Halloween costumes, one of the only photos that had them all together. Patton had somehow gotten someone to take the photo, although it had been too long for Janus to recall who had been on the other side of the camera.

He smiled at the photo and set it down. It was a good memory and he didn’t want to cut the picture down, so he instead glued it in the center of the collage.

He took a few letters that he’d cut out and spelled them out into a phrase that Patton had text him over the summer.

famILY.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment or I'll break ur knees.  
> kudos?
> 
> virgil: is confident for once and is okay with his scars showing.  
> also virgil: panics when he realizes that his scars are showing.  
> you're gonna be okay virgil, just trust your roommates.


	6. Adultery is the process of becoming an adult. (don't ever change Patton)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talk about pens and what certain slang means.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wet blanket- Virgil  
> On_The_Virge- Virgil  
> DAD<3: Patton  
> DankSnekMan- janus  
> Princey- Roman

_ 4:20 a.m. EST. _

DAD<3: Reviving this sleeping beast of a chat!

Janus: You woke me up.

wet blanket: whats my name on here again

wet blanket: oh right lmao

Logan: Good morning everyone.

Princey: nothing’s good anymore.

wet blanket: that

wet blanket: that was dark even for me

DAD<3: Awww kiddo, how can I help you?

Princey: make my parents accepting?

DAD<3: I don’t think I have enough cookies to fix that.

wet blanket: are any of us actually going to the freshman fair tomorrow

Logan: I need more pens, so yes.

Janus: That’s stealing.

wet blanket: ya but were too poor to go buy new pens.

Janus: valid

DAD<3: I would buy you pens if you asked.

wet blanket: i dont need another gold plated pen

wet blanket: sorry dad

wet blanket: but i love my frosh pens too much to miss out on them.

Logan: Virgil, go to sleep or I’ll come in and knock you out myself.

wet blanket: bite me.

Janus: Oh my gosh, get a chat room.

wet blanket: heh

Logan: What are you talking about?

Janus: Oh my gosh.

Janus: nevermind, go back to sleep, you don’t need to know this slang.

Logan: Okay?

Logan: Why can I hear Virgil laughing from my room?

wet blanket: just go to sleep lo.

DAD<3: wait, I don’t get it either! Can someone please explain!?!?

Janus: …

wet blanket: …

~

DankSnekMan: I swear, if you ruin this for patton, I’ll end you.

On_The_Virge: kk, I won’t

~

wet blanket: its nothing patton

DAD<3: okay!

DAD<3: hey, did you kiddo know that the process of becoming an adult is through adultery?

Janus: …

Logan: That is wildly incorrect.

DAD<3: Virgil told me that!

~

DankSnekMan: I will end you tomorrow morning.

On_The_Virge:  _ oh no... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my lungs rattle like a piggy bank and when you shake me, a singular word comes out: Kudos.


	7. Take a step back and breathe honey, it's okay to be hurt inside.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan and Virgil attempt to go to couples therapy.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> spoiler warning for miraculous ladybug. (it's a cartoon and it's another fandom that i'm in, so you better believe Emile's gonna watch it.)
> 
> so what I might have a massive migraine and can't sleep?  
> I just wanted to write something, anything.
> 
> the longer I spend in this fandom, the more I find that there's a bunch of regulars. hammyboi, morefedupthanriverdaleswriting, mushroomwings to name a few, I see them everywhere in the fics that i'm reading and writing.  
> everyone is great, i'm glad that you all read my stuff.

Logan gently rested his hand over Virgil’s.

“Your hand is shaking.”

“Yeah, we’re going to couples therapy for shared trauma, that just happens to be a professor that Janus doesn’t think of as credible, of course my hand is going to be shaking more than normal.” Virgil snapped at him, before his face fell as he shrunk in his seat. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Logan promised as the door swung open and Dr. Emile Picani stuck his head out, face brightening when he saw the two.

“Purple hair! We match! Come on in you two!” Dr. Picani waved vigorously at him and Virgil and Logan was already starting to regret that they’d taken up Patton’s advice. 

They walked into the office and Logan had to admit, it was slightly impressive, the amount of cartoon and animated references there were.

“Take a seat, take a seat please!” Dr. Picani pointed at the two person couch and Logan and Virgil complied as Picani closed the door and sat on a stool in front of them.

“So, can I get some names?”

“Virgil.”

“Logan.”

“And you two are in a relationship?” Picani asked as he scribbled down something in his notebook.

“Yeah, we did sign up for the couples therapy.” Virgil practically hissed at Dr. Picani and Logan looked over nervously.

Something was wrong, normally Virgil wasn’t this snarky this early into human interaction and all that but first with how his injury was acting up and then now, with him lashing out not once but twice---

It was reminiscent of when they had first met.

“Why are you two here today? Have any problems you wanna talk about, or should we just start talking?” Picani smiled warmly and for a moment, the room was completely silent. 

Virgil stood and walked out, leaving Logan sitting alone with Dr. Picani.

“Are you going to go after him?”

“No.” Logan said numbly.

“Do you want to reschedule?” Picani asked gently as Logan shook his head again, feeling the sharp sting of salty tears begin to rise up.

“Hey, hey, hey, everything good bud?”

“As much as I’d like to say that everything is ‘all good’ it’s not and I don’t know what to do for the first time in my life. It’s always been easy for me to know what I’m doing next and only now everything is spiraling out of control--” Logan took a hiccuping breath and looked to see that Picani was holding out a box of tissues.

“Thanks.”

“No problem. Do you like cartoons?”

“Not really, I find them highly improbable and ridiculous.” Logan sniffed. “Sorry, that wasn’t very tactful of me.”

“We’re all subject to our own opinions Logan. Now, I’m gonna tell you about one of my favorite cartoons and we’re going to try to relate it back to you.”

“I don’t know how this is going to be beneficial.”

“You’ll see. Anyway, ever heard of Miraculous Ladybug?”

“No.”

“Good. It got canceled after season three, but that’s not what we’re looking at with the show. We’re looking at the main character.” Picani held out a small figurine for Logan to take.

“Thanks?”

“That’s Ladybug, she’s a hero by day and night and a normal girl the rest of the time.”

“That seems incredibly stressful.” Logan toyed with the figurine, taking in the bright costume of the heroine.

“Oh it is. By the end of the show’s run she has a complete mental breakdown with all the responsibilities that have been forced on her.”

“How does this apply to me?”

“You’re Marinette, or Ladybug as she’s known as, has to constantly keep her double life from her family and friends while undergoing traumatic experiences.”

“I don’t hide anything from my family and friends.”

“Hmmmm. But you have undergone a traumatic experience, do you mind telling me about it?”

“There’s not much to talk about. It was snowing, we were all happy and Roman’s brother tried to kill us.”

“That sure sounds like a lot to unpack.” Picani looked at him over his glasses, the ghost of a smile crossing his face.

“I feel like it’s my fault, that Virgil got hurt.”

The confession sat heavy in the air and Logan watched as Dr. Picani closed his notebook and leaned forward.

“Why?”

“Because  _ I _ was the one who was supposed to get hit and I  _ didn’t _ .” 

“Oh.” Picani’s voice was soft and Logan hated the pitying look that he was getting from the professor.

“You’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders Logan. I’m prescribing you with a weekend getaway.”

“That’s--”

“No, no buts or telling me that you can’t. I want you to take Virgil, or don’t, and go rent a hotel room for a weekend. You need a break to just breathe. “

“What am I supposed to do for an entire weekend?”

Picani shrugged. “Sleep in, binge T.V., sneak out and go to the beach at midnight to go swimming, talk until midnight, I don’t care, just be a college kid for a weekend. Then come back to me and we’ll do whatever it takes to work out everything okay?”

Logan nodded and stood, holding out a hand to shake. Picani gave him a vigorous shake and then opened the door for Logan.

“Promise me you’ll do it Mr. Berry.”

“Do I have to?”

“Yes, and I’m telling Patton that you need a break too, so that you have to.”

Logan mustered a smile at that as he left, trying hard not to panic at the idea of having a break.

He honestly couldn’t remember the last time that he took a break for himself, after all, heading back to Oregon for the summer and breaks was more for his family and he wasn’t one to go run off to a different part of the state for a weekend.

But a small part of him, a very, very small part of him was excited to plan something just for himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos? Comments?


	8. the actual chapter eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman eats cheese.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi and welcome back to the main flow of the story.  
> neat.

Roman was wrong.

Wrong.

_ Wrong. _

_ Wrong! _

The thing about midnight mental breakdowns in the employee break room meant that normally Remy would have been there to help him through it.

Not anymore.

He had pushed Remy away and now he was trying not to scream as he drew in shuddering breaths.

The door opened and Roman closed his eyes as the footsteps neared him.

“Hey Ro, let's get you home.” It’s Sam, she’s been covering his shifts and sending her little sister to pick him up when one of his roommates can’t.

He stumbled to his feet and out to the sidewalk, unaware of Sam behind him, locking up the bar and then gently leading him to the bus stop.

Roman wished that he could say that he remembered the ride home, but he blinked and then he was sitting on the couch, Patton on one side, offering him tea as Logan wrapped a blanket around him.

_ He’s dissociating. _

_ How do you know what that is??? _

_ Virgil’s been affected by it a few times. _

_ How do we get him out of it? He’s scaring me. _

_ Reciting something, physical touch, something comforting, basically what we’re already doing. _

_ Roman? _

...

…

“Roman, snap out of it motherfucker, we’re going to the beach.”

Roman was dimly aware that someone in purple was throwing a towel at his head and he ducked.

“Told you that it’d work Left Brain, lets go before he realizes that we’re not actually taking him to the beach.”

“Virgil…”

The door slammed and Logan and Virgil were gone as Roman picked up the towel mournfully.

At least whenever they got back he could thank Virgil for ripping him out of his catatonic state. He stood and wandered to the kitchen, opening the fridge and pulling out a block of cheese.

Janus found him sitting on the counter, taking bites out of the block of cheese as he stared off into space.

“That’s a very Virgil thing Princey.”

“It’s September twenty fifth, isn’t it?”

Janus tapped his cane against the floor of the kitchen. “Yes.”

“It’s been six weeks since I remember anything important.” Roman said numbly as he took another bite out of his cheese.

“That is,  _ concerning _ . I’m sure that you’ll recover your memory fog with time. And you’ll get over your breakup.”

“I can see why you’re still at Virgil’s throat all the time. You’re blunt.” Roman continued to chew his cheese and Janus tilted his head sideways at Roman’s outburst.

“Loss of a filter, interesting.”

“Don’t try to psychoanalyze me you snake bastard.”

“Alright, I’m dragging your sorry ass to Picani, because this is just as bad as being catatonic.” Janus limped over and stole Roman’s cheese, who protested weakly, but didn’t get off the counter.

“Patton! I’ll be back in like a half hour tops!”

And then, Janus’s hand was like a vice on his shoulder as the shorter man dragged him to Picani’s for ‘therapy’.

Janus must’ve called ahead or something, because Dr. Picani had already put out a few of the things that Roman liked to hold on to during sessions and when Janus shot the professor a grateful look, it didn’t miss Roman’s line of sight.

“So, Roman. How’s it going?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos?  
> comments?
> 
> shortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchaptershortchapter.....


	9. Burn away the past.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil and Roman cope.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I time jumped because the majority of this story is supposed to take place in march/april and so I wanted to get to christmas as soon as possible and so there went october, november and 90% of december.

Virgil strung up a line of fairy lights as Logan watched, not helping him, but just shooting off comments that made Virgil wanna wrap the lights around his boyfriend’s neck.

“A bit more to the left.”

“Logan, get up here and fix it yourself.” Virgil jumped off the ladder and Logan shook his head.

“I don’t trust this ladder.”

“Kinda like how you don’t trust the dishwasher.” Virgil tossed another strand of fairy lights at the nerd who sighed as he caught them.

“It wasn’t my idea to spend your birthday here.” Logan shook his head as he scaled the ladder.

“I’m going to be twenty two in three days, can you believe it? I’m surprised that I’m alive.” Virgil handed up some tape as Logan shot down a concerned glance.

“I mean by when Patton almost burned down the place when he tried to use the grill out back.” 

“That fireball was impressive.” Logan reached down for another piece of tape and Virgil complied as the ladder wobbled.

“Are we going to Roman’s musical?” 

“I don’t want to, but I’ll go support him if that’s what’s needed.” Virgil slipped his hands into his hoodie pockets. “I don’t want a repeat of the last time I went to a performance around Christmas.”

Virgil saw Logan flinch at his words and he quickly backpedaled. “The triggers aren’t as bad anymore, Picani’s really been helping, we can totally go--”

“I shouldn’t have been so insensitive, I forgot.”

“It’s nothing. I was planning on using Roman’s performances as an excuse to use his sewing machine so I can finish up a few presents.” Virgil admitted as Logan climbed down the ladder and folded it.

“I was unaware that you sew.”

“I have a few weird talents. If you really want to go see  _ It’s a Wonderful Life  _ then I will happily come. As long as it’s not on my birthday or Christmas Eve.”

“How does the twenty third sound?” Logan pulled a few tickets out of his pocket and passed them to Virgil. “Because, that’s when we’re going.”

Virgil held back a smile as he looked at the tickets. Trust Logan to already be prepared for the show  _ and _ for a gap day on either side of the accident.

Virgil was convinced that Logan was some sort of angel at this point. An angel that couldn’t always nail the joke, or sometimes would laugh at a line that would be on the back of a book that they were shelving, but he still was the next best thing since sliced bread.

He excused himself to camp out in Roman’s room to finish his project. 

When he’d first moved in, he’d been too nervous to ask if he could borrow Roman’s sewing machine, which the theater jock had only bought for his one semester costuming class, but after Roman had walked in on Virgil fixing the hem of one of his assignments, they’d come to a truce.

Virgil was allowed to use the machine as long as he didn’t snoop around Roman’s room (why would he??) and if he personally tailored Roman’s costumes.

It was a pretty fair trade off in Virgil’s eyes, mostly because he could bribe Roman into purchasing fabrics that he didn’t need so that he could use them for his personal projects.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sewing, but when the door creaked open and Roman wobbled in on unsteady legs.

“Emo.”

“Princey.”

“Why you still up?” Roman slurred as he collapsed onto his bed, while Virgil pulled a bit of loose thread off of the blanket he was stitching together.

“Christmas is soon and I’d like to have my presents finished.”

“I thought creativity was my department.” Roman whined as he smeared stage makeup onto his pillow. Virgil laughed softly and shook his head as he tossed the pattern that he was using at the actor.

“This is for Patton’s blanket. I bought the patterns for everyone’s stuff, you still have the title of ‘most creative here.’”

“Good. At least I have the semblance of some control over my life.”

Virgil stopped sewing and looked at Roman with concern. “Do you really feel like you have no more control?”

“Of course. And I’m not being my usual dramatic self.”

“It’s because of Remus, isn’t it?” Virgil folded his work in progress and shut down the sewing machine, before swiveling his chair around to face Roman.

“One of many factors.”

“Do you have a photo of you two?”

Roman looked at him quizzically, before nodding. “And how has this got to do with anything?”

Virgil just gave him a lopsided grin. “Get it and meet me out back. Preferably in normal clothes.”

He hopped off the chair and went to his room, grabbing  _ the _ photo from out of his desk and bringing it downstairs and out back.

Virgil looked down at the photo. He wasn’t sure why he’d held onto the polaroid for so long, carried around a part of his past that he didn’t want.

The back door slid open and Roman walked out, holding a crumpled photo that he smoothed out and showed to Virgil.

“Will this work?”

“Yeah. Here’s mine. We’re going to burn them.”

Roman laughed. “You’re joking Dr. Gloom.”

“Would you prefer we destroy your phone? Come on, the grill still has some lighter fluid left in it.” Virgil stuck his tongue out at Roman as they crowded around the burnt grill.

Patton could cook, but he sure as hell had no idea how to grill.

“Who’s in your photo?” Roman asked as they tossed the photographs in and Virgil shrugged.

“Old friend.”

“And how’d they hurt you so badly that you want to burn a picture that you have with them?”

“Long story that the overdramatic prince doesn’t need to know the answer to. Back from when I lived in New York.”

“You lived in New York?”

Virgil nodded as he lit a match and dropped it in, watching the flame lick the edges of his polaroid. “Yes. Only for a year though, then I moved down here and I’ve been in Florida ever since.”

“Cool. Wouldn't it been awesome if our paths had crossed before now?” Roman watched their pictures curl into ash and Virgil shook his head.

“You would definitely be on the wrong side of the city if you and I crossed paths. Don’t ask.” He stopped Roman before anything could be said and as the last of the heat left the ashes in the grill, he relaxed.

“That, that felt surprisingly good.” Roman admitted as Virgil shut the grill cover.

“It always feels good to destroy stuff. I’ve been waiting for almost three years to burn that polaroid. I wanted to have someone to do it with so the fire lasted longer.”

“You really  _ are _ emo.”

“What were you expecting Princey?” Virgil teased as they went back inside. “It’s in my nature.”

“Whatever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments?  
> kudos?
> 
> Explaining 'gap days': Hi, yes I have PTSD and I project onto virgil because it's easier that way. Anyway, 'gap days' are days before and after an accident, or a specific day that my PTSD flares up due to anniversary of said accident. I have three gap weeks in a year, one around the fourth of july, another around christmas and the third being around my birthday. During these gap days, I'm more likely to go into a depressive episode, have more flashbacks and generally be catatonic or dissociative depending on how much my brain wants to torture me.  
> anyway, virgil spends most of december 20th and 21st in bed and the only reason that he wasn't in bed on the 19th was that logan distracted him for most of the day because it was his birthday. (happy birthday virgil!)


	10. I just found out that Thomas has a beanbag in the corner of his living room, and it's now the Christmas tree for our boys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton is a gremlin on Christmas.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to do a whole 'cooking christmas dinner scene' where Patton burns a crap ton of stuff before Roman and Logan just step in a cook everything, because just because Patton can bake doesn't mean he can grill or cook anything else and it's semi canon that Roman can cook and I haven't used that enough here.  
> but instead I wrote this.

Patton flung open Janus’s door and started jumping on the bed, long enough to wake him up, before he hopped down and grinned.

“Christmas!”

“Five more minutes.” Janus responded, but Patton was already halfway to the door, on his way to wake up Roman.

“Roman! It’s Christmas!”  
“Indeed it is my good sir!” Roman beamed at Patton as he jumped out of bed and Patton gave him a quick hug before leaving to go wake up Logan.

“Logan, Merry Christmas!” He threw open the door to see that Logan was shirtless, and the nerd threw a pillow at him as Patton retreated.

“Please let me finish getting dressed before barging in again!” Logan’s voice rose up an octave and Patton just laughed before exiting to knock aggressively on Virgil’s door.

“STORM! It’s Christmas!!!! Get up, I wanna open presents!!”

Virgil’s door flew open and Patton was wrapped in a bone crushing hug. 

“I know, I’m excited too, do you want to help me carry down the gifts I just finished wrapping?” Virgil was actually awake this morning and Patton gleefully helped him carry the black and purple wrapped gifts.

Once they had brought everything downstairs-- including a grumpy Logan sans tie but with a shirt-- Patton herded them to the couch, excitement bubbling up in his chest as they all sat.

“Who wants to go first?”

The room was silent for a moment before Logan sighed and raised his hand. “I guess I will if no one feels adequate enough to volunteer.”

Logan went to the beanbag that they had in the corner of the living room--Patton had wrapped lights around it to imitate a tree, because the beanbag was green too-- and he grabbed four envelopes that he passed to the others.

Patton practically tore his envelope in half trying to open it. He hated envelopes and how hard they were to open, but once he got the card out, he let out a small gasp.

It was a beautiful hand painted card and he could tell that Logan must’ve spent hours sketching and inking in the night sky. 

“There’s messages inside the cards as well.” Logan said nervously and Patton opened his card, surprised to see that Logan had put effort into making his looping cursive legible.

_ I have to admit Patton, you’re out of this world. _

It was clever and unique and he loved it. Around him, the others were smiling and Logan had a slight blush from the amount of praise that he was getting.

Roman went next and he just pulled out another coffee maker and gave everyone a different flavor of coffee beans. 

“It’s to make up for all the times that Virgil stole the coffee pot.”

“You’re not allowed to atone for my sins Princey.” Virgil hissed, but Patton could tell that he was slightly pleased with the coffee.

Patton could remember that he had had coffee exactly twice in his life, both times ending with a caffeine crash and a migraine. Roman’s gift was oddly considerate, decaf coffee that claimed to be hazelnut flavored.

Janus moved from his spot next to Patton and he handed out a singular stick of gum to each person.

“Happy Hanukkah.”

Patton took Janus’s hand when he sat back down. “You should have told us that you were Jewish, we would have celebrated accordingly.”

Janus shook his head. “I’m not. I just don’t celebrate Christmas.”

There was the sound of snapping gum and Patton looked over to see that Roman had already consumed his stick, in addition to Virgil’s and Logan’s. “Thanks for the gum JJ.”

“Of course Roman.”

As much as Patton wanted to go next, he motioned for Virgil to go. When he was handed the bulky present with a small smile, he couldn’t help but be excited. It was pretty obvious at this point that Virgil had been shutting himself in Roman’s room to work on their gifts and Patton knew that with the amount of time he’d been locked up in there, it had to be amazing.

And when the soft blanket fell into his lap, he lifted it up, eyes wide at the pattern that was stitched into and the fact that in the background Roman and Virgil were bickering about something to do with Roman’s blanket.

“Well of course yours is less cool, you spent so much time in your fucking room, I only had a few hours to complete it.”

“No, you misunderstood Dr. Gloom, I _ like _ the simplicity. It makes me feel like a prince!”

“You are a prince, it’s literally your last name.” Patton laughed and wrapped his blanket around his shoulders. “It’s perfect, thank you Virgil.”

Virgil nodded as he snuggled into Logan’s side, Logan’s blanket draped over both of them.

Patton wanted to cuddle with Janus like how Virgil and Logan were, but he still had to give his presents out.

Like Logan, his were also in envelopes, but there were only two thick envelopes and he offered one to Janus to open and the other to Roman.

“Mine’s a group gift, and Sam and Jess are included in it, but since they went back to Maine for the holidays, I’ll give them theirs when they get back!”

Janus opened the envelope, face wrinkling in confusion. “A receipt for an AirBNB for two weeks in March?”

“Look where!”

“New York City?”

“Yep! Kay Roman, open yours and make sure to show everyone!”  
Roman slid out the tickets, and then he looked up at Patton, surprised. “Broadway tickets to see _Wicked_! Dad, you didn’t have to do this.”

“Check the date! Check that date!”

“March 21st. PAtton!” Roman surged up and hugged him, “thank you so much!”

“Anything for my kiddos. Two weeks in NYC with my friends for spring break is all I wanted to give you all for Christmas.”

“We could find Roman’s parents during that time and collectively beat them up.” Virgil muttered and Patton shook his head.

“Let’s not resort to violence--”

“Please.” Virgil interrupted pleadingly.

“--until I buy the mace.”

“Awesome.” 

“There’s more! My parents offered to pay for transportation there as my Christmas gift, so we don’t have to worry about a long bus ride or expensive flight tickets!”

“Patton, you’re really too good for this world.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> patton: oh yeah, i bought tickets for sam and jess too  
> roman: why is there an extra ticket?  
> patton, quietly: oh yeah, remy's coming too, after we beat up your parents.  
> roman, trying not to cry: thanks bro


	11. Proposals and Resolutions.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janus has a few New Year's resolutions.  
> Chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um, I don't know how alcohol works, I drank once- when i was eleven- and I think alcohol is nasty, so yeah.  
> enjoy some Moceit fluff and some platonic Loceit!

Janus clinked his champagne flute against Roman’s, smiling wryly as he tossed it back.

“Happy NEw year!” Virgil was drunk, rightfully so and he was leaning against Logan as he made his halfhearted toast.

Patton had been a total alcoholic lightweight and was now sleeping upstairs in Janus’s bed while the rest of the New Years’ party continued downstairs. He didn’t pity the headache that his boyfriend was going to have upon waking up, but he did feel slightly bad that he hadn’t done anything to help out Patton before unceremoniously tossing him into his bed.

Janus snapped out of the thought as he was offered more champagne. 

“Now I know this is usually Padre’s job, but seeing as he’s down and out, I’m taking over. What’s our New Year’s resolutions?” Roman tilted his party hat forward a bit and smiled. “I’m going to tell my parents about Remy and no matter what they say, I’m going to woo him back.”

“That’s lofty.” Janus muttered as he stuck a hand in his jacket pocket.

“Well, what’s your goal snake man?”

“Proposal.” Janus deadpanned.

“Really?” Roman said in shock, his eyes lighting up with excitement.

“Of course not.” Janus forced out the lie and Roman rolled with it, gratefully turning his attention to Logan and Virgil.

Of course he was planning on proposing to Patton. When the time was right, when he was financially stable and when he finished his bachelor’s degree. All three of those could happen this year and he’d have a husband by his side as he pursued his doctorate in psychology. Hopefully.

Roman laughed at Virgil’s resolution-- not die-- and Janus agreed. It was a good resolution considering Virgil had almost died every year of his life and he probably wasn’t about to break that record, but who knew at this point?

“My resolution is to finish my thesis without Virgil making my all nighter drinks.” Logan said smoothly and Janus barked out a laugh at that one.

He remembered quite clearly the first time Virgil had made Logan an all nighter energy drink. Logan had described the feeling as ‘being tired and then suddenly seven hours had passed and he was even more tired’. Virgil had refused to tell what was in the drink but when Janus had slipped some to Dr. Picani, Emile had told him with scary accuracy that the abomination was instant coffee mixed with a Bang energy drink.

The one time that Janus  _ had _ asked for an abomination, he’d watched with horror as Virgil poured a Five Hour Energy into a Dr. Pepper and shook it a few times before handing it over with a wink.

Logan’s resolution was a good one.

The question fizzled out and slowly Janus worked his way upstairs, opening his door quietly as not to wake Patton. He sat down on the edge of the bed and took off his leg brace before laying down, wrapping one arm around his sleeping boyfriend.

He pulled a small velvet box out of his jacket pocket and sighed. It was just a ring, he was just a college student and Patton was just a dream.

They’d known each other for just over a year, and Janus knew that he couldn’t force a proposal.

There was something about the bubbly Humanities major that made him so happy. Janus smiled softly as Patton shifted, pressing himself closer to him.

The ring and proposal could wait, honestly Janus wasn’t sure what had spurred him to buy the ring when he had, but it was one of those things that you could hide under the bed and avoid until the right time came.

So that’s what he did.

Morning came with a slight headache from staying up so late and a dry throat. Janus sat up with a groan and when he looked over at Patton, his heart fell down into his stomach.

“My head hurts.”

“You shouldn’t have drank so much Patton Cake.”

“It was one  _ singular _ flute of champagne.” Patton complained, taking Janus’s arm and flopping it over his face.

“Oh sweetie, was that your first time drinking?”

“No… someone spiked the punch bowl at senior prom once.”

“That’s hardly drinking. You lay here, I’ll get you some water and toast.” Janus pulled his arm away from Patton, swung his legs out of bed and stood, immediately collapsing.

“You okay?” Patton sat up and looked down, concern lacing his voice.

“Yeah, I’m fine, you’d think that after all these years I’d remember to either grab my cane or put on my brace.” Janus sighed as he pulled his brace on and used his cane to stand back up.

“Mmmm, imma lay back down.” Patton fell back again and Janus went downstairs to the kitchen, filling a glass with water and drinking it before grabbing a second glass for Patton.

Patton was sitting up when he returned, the blanket from Virgil wrapped around his shoulders and he accepted the water that Janus offered him gratefully.

“What would I do without you Janus?”

“You probably wouldn’t have a hangover.”

“I wouldn’t have a great boyfriend either.” Patton grinned at him and Janus smiled back, trying hard not to be too loud as he pulled out his outfit for the day, adding a pair of yellow gloves to the mix to spice things up.

“I’m going to go get you some migraine medication.” 

“Hi I’m going to go get you---Ouch!-- thanks Janus.”

“You just sleep off that hangover, I’ll probably take Logan with me so that we get the best solution.” Janus said as he struggled into the jeans and flannel while Patton rested in his bed, eyes still closed as he blocked out the light.

Janus pressed a kiss to Patton’s forehead before leaving.

Logan was downstairs in the kitchen, sipping something from a mug and he raised it in greeting.

“I’m going shopping, do you want to come?”

“Coincidently, I was about to ask you the same question.” Logan set down his mug and nodded. “Let’s depart before Roman wakes up and demands to come with us.”

So, less than five minutes later, they were wrapped in coats and braving the ‘cold’ of the Florida January. 

“Bus or Uber?” Logan asks as he pulled out a phone, Janus noted the sleek black case that signified that once again, Virgil had successfully swapped his phone with Logan’s and it’d be only a matter of time before the nerd noticed.  
“Bus to the store and then I uber back because of the groceries. And we have to pick up some migraine medication for Patton.” Janus said nonchalantly as they came to a stop to wait.

“This isn’t my phone.”

“Ah, I was hoping it’d take longer this time.” Janus muttered.

_ “This has happened before?!?” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when one door closes, you should open it, because that's how doors work. But not before leaving comments and kudos down below.
> 
> I have made ever single type of drink combo that Janus and Virgil mention. How do you think I got ideas for it?
> 
> oh yeah- I have a tumblr! it's miraculous-mused and if you wanna come ask me questions about this fic (and any others that I've written) you can go scream at me there!


	12. Text me while I sit in jail.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Texting shenanigans  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> even when everything's looking okay, that's when the peace shatters.  
> there's a few "innuendos"  
> you'll see, it's not that inappropriate, I just learned a bunch of slang (thanks tumblr!) and I wanted you all to suffer with me.

_February 10th, 2:17 am EST_

Sam: Bail me out?

Jess: Sure, where the hell are you?

Sam: With Virgil and Remy.

Jess: What on earth were you guys doing at 2 am.

Jess: If I get out of bed, it’s gonna wake up my gf

Sam: whoa, when did that happen

Jess: dunno

Sam: you never told me u were bi

Jess: pan actually

Sam: neato

Sam: that explains why you haven't been back at the apartment recently.

Sam: bail Me out?

Jess: I wanna hear what you guys did first.

Sam: Uhhhhh

Sam: Remy had this really great idea to egg this homophobic frat group

Sam: Virgil said that he had really good aim

Sam: I came along because why not

Jess: did they say aces weren’t valid?

Sam: yeah

Sam: that’s what actually spurred the trip.

Sam: Anywho

Sam: we got caught

Jess: do u realize I am now going to have to explain to Logan why his boyfriend is missing.

Sam: sorry?

Jess: f. u.

Jess: give me ten minutes

Sam: thx, ur a doll.

...

_February 10th, 2:34 am EST_

Sam’s sister: Logan wake up

Logan: Yes?

Sam’s sister: Your bf and Sam are in jail.

Logan: …

Logan: How much to bail them out?

Sam’s sister: it’s the campus jail, so like 100 dollars and a jar of jam.

Logan: I’ll pay half if you pay half

Sam’s sister: cool, just venmo me it, I’m already there.

Logan: Slap Virgil for me?

Sam’s sister: I’ll have to refrain, they were egging a homophobe

Logan: Ah

Logan: Well, Virgil’s a pretty good thrower. :)

Sam’s sister: hkaskwejnj

Logan: ?

Sam’s sister: nothing.

Sam’s sister: Never text that phrase again.

Logan: Okay?

…

_February 10th, 8:30 am EST_

Shameless_flirt: ur welcome ;)

purble_hair: thx

Shameless_flirt: Logan and I had an… interesting conversation

purble_hair: did he misuse slang

Shameless_flirt: more like an innuendo 

purble_hair: i already know where this is going

purble_hair: sorry in advance

purble_hair: before u ask

purble_hair: no we haven’t

Shameless_flirt: Virgil the virgin, it’s kinda catchy.

purble_hair: yes and it’s staying that way

Shameless_flirt: just checking ;))))))

purble_hair: you’re nasty 

Shameless_flirt: are you excited for NYC?

purble_hair: that’s still three weeks out

Shameless_flirt: I’ve been packed since I found out.

purble_hair: I don’t own enough clothing to do something like that XD

Shameless_flirt: gtg, see you later...

Shameless_flirt: _...thrower_

purble_hair: [REDACTED]

…

_February 10th, 10:30 am EST_

Chemically Imbalanced Romance: did you *actually* call me a thrower

Left Brain: You throw things.

Left Brain: I was unaware of the other meanings.

Chemically Imbalanced Romance: its chill

Left Brain: Are we still doing dinner for the fourteenth?

Chemically Imbalanced Romance: wouldnt miss it for the world

…

_February 13th, 5:09 pm EST_

Emo Nightmare: so you have a plan for tomorrow

They_see_me_Roman: Grandly waltz up to Remy and beg for mercy.

Emo Nightmare: grandly and beg don’t belong in the same sentence

They_see_me_Roman: I don’t know what to do.

Emo Nightmare: i cant believe im wingmanning you rn

They_see_me_Roman: I know! It’s horrible how you’ve managed to create a relationship out of mutual trust and companionship and I can’t even keep up my once secret relationship with the bartender I work with.

Emo Nightmare: …

Emo Nightmare: horrible i can imagine.

They_see_me_Roman: I didn’t mean it that way.

They_see_me_Roman: I know the universe loves throwing it’s shit at you.

Emo Nightmare: its fine i know ur stressed

Emo Nightmare: take my advice

Emo Nightmare: just be yourself and admit your weakness

They_see_me_Roman: and if he says no?

Emo Nightmare: go get drunk and cry it off.

Emo Nightmare: are you sure that you want to do this before you tell ur parents

They_see_me_Roman: yes.

Emo Nightmare: gl

They_see_me_Roman: thanks.

…

_February 13th, 7:00 pm EST_

DAD<3: So!

wet blanket: so

Logan: So?

Princey: So what? What’s going on?

DAD<3: Nothing, I just wanted to let everyone know that our flight tickets got confirmed for the 14th of March and then we fly out the 23rd.

Princey: I could kiss you right now.

Janus: I will cut you if you do.

Janus: Back off

Janus: hiss.

wet blanket: hiss

Logan: Did you both just hiss?

wet blanket: yes

Janus: I’m protective that way.

Princey: XD

…

_February 14th, 9:30 pm EST_

DankSnekMan: So Roman just barged in on patton and my date. Care to explain?

On_The_Virge: oof

On_The_Virge: Send him into my room to cry, I’ll deal with him once Lo and I get back.

DankSnekMan: I’d say thanks, but I’m not feeling too grateful.

On_The_Virge: :/

…

_February 14th, 11:48 pm EST_

Sam: Lolo, u good?

Logan: Yeah.

Sam: Sorry that roman spoiled the last part of your date

Logan: Oh, Roman didn’t ruin anything.

Sam: what happened then?

Logan: Virgil tried to play the ukulele for the first time since the accident…

Sam: ! 

Sam: that’s good, right?

Logan: He was crying by the end, his hand couldn’t hold up with the stress.

Logan: Said that he felt like a failure.

Sam: I’m so sorry.

Logan: Do you play the ukulele?

Sam: ah hell no.

Sam: I can barely play the piano and bass guitar is a whole different thing than ukulele.

Sam: my sister does.

Logan: Could she teach me?

Sam: probably

Logan: If I can learn to play, then maybe 

Sam: you want to play while he sings?

Sam: You are too pure for this world.

Logan: Well, Virgil does all the writing and stuff.

Logan: He’s filled up an entire notebook of song lyrics and chords that he can’t play and I just want to help.

Sam: You are too pure.

Logan: So will you help?

Sam: Duh

…

_February 16th, 12:19 pm EST_

Morality: hey baby <3 :) 

Deceit: hey.

Morality: how’s it going? :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Deceit: fine.

Morality: ah shit

Deceit: Oh honey, you’re fine.

Deceit: I just have to skip class with Picani.

Morality: What’s wrong?

Deceit: doctor’s appointment. They finally cleared a spot so I can get my brace fixed.

Morality: that’s great! Don’t worry, I’ll let Picani know that you can’t make it!

Deceit: gosh I love you.

Morality: AHHHHHH

Deceit: ?

Morality: That’s just the first time you’ve texted it to me!!

Deceit: I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, and I'll keep saying it until the end of time.

Morality: you’re making me blushhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Deceit: I love you. See you after my appointment.

…

_March 1st, 5:30 am EST_

Unknown: Happiness comes at a price V. Are you willing to pay it?

Virgil: Gotta love the spam texts.

Unknown: I know about the polaroid.

Virgil: If you’re from my past life, fuck off.

Unknown: Careful V, you’re the only one who knows what’s waiting in the dark. I’m sure Logan would hate to find out.

Virgil: If you even text him…

Unknown: Aw V, you know I don’t play that way. Have fun in New York.

…

...

_Virgil blocked Unknown._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm wheezing, coughing up something that looks like white rose petals. You pick one off the ground and realize that it is, in fact, a paper asking two questions:
> 
> Kudos?  
> comments?


	13. What happened on Valentine's (As told by Remy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remy has a chat with Roman.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo, I was gonna have this be a side short, but it's kinda important to the main plot, so I included it. Unlike the beach thing chapter and subways, cuts and pastry, which don't have to be read, this absolutely had to, so here's some remy  
> and some platonic Remile!
> 
> remy and emile are literally only a few years older than the group and so it's funny having basically your older brother teach your practical applications class and yet Dr Picani has a doctorate and he's a semi well known psychologist. that's what you get for going to college at fourteen and having a doctorate by the time you're twenty.

Remy hadn’t seen Roman since the falling out over his Ikea furniture. Sure, he’d hung out with Virgil on occasion and he’d spent the entirety of Thanksgiving with Logan’s friend Sam, both of them watching rom coms until three am, but he hadn’t seen Roman.

It was hard to convince his employer to put them on directly opposite shifts at work, but he couldn’t stand to see Roman’s heartbroken face after all that had gone down.

There was a difference between him and Roman. Remy did not give a singular fuck as to what his parents thought. And as much as he wanted to tell Roman the same thing, that he shouldn’t have to care about it, Remy knew he couldn’t.

That was Roman’s problem and he had to step back.

So now, here he was, working a double shift on Valentine’s Day, feeling kinda miffed that people were still coming in, it was close to ten, you’d think that the majority of the singles would have gone home to wallow by now.

That’s what Remy wanted to do. He wanted to go home and gossip with Picani, who also had really bad luck in the romantic department, mostly because no one realized that he was literally twenty-five and only a bit older than most of the students that he taught.

He was a great gossip. Not as great as Roman had been, but Remy had to take the opportunities he got and unfortunately, being friends with your ex-boyfriend’s therapist happened to be one of those.

The door swung open and he looked up to see Roman walking, no, strutting in confidently. Remy rolled his eyes and snapped his sunglasses down.

“What can I get the lonely bitch?” 

“Oh, something highly caffeinated and sarcastic.” Roman leaned over the bar and Remy had a brief flashback to all the times that they’d been in this position, one working, the other waiting.

“One water for you.”

“Ouch.”

“We haven’t talked since the grand IKEA scandal, you think that I’m going to run back so quickly?” Remy poured some water and slid it in front of Roman, smirking darkly.

To his surprise, Roman took the water and downed it. “Tastes like you.”

“Whatever babe. Why are you actually here?”

“I wanted to talk to you.”

“Sure thing, you can plan an appointment for…. never.” Remy refilled the water with whiskey, the amber liquid looking odd in the wrong glass.

“Rem.”

“No pet names allowed for exes.”

“Can we please just talk?” Roman pleaded with him and Remy sighed dramatically before throwing his hands up in defeat.

“I guess.” Remy pointed to the employees office and waited for Roman to enter before he turned to the few patrons that were watching the whole spectacle. 

“If all ya’ll aren’t outta here by the time I’m done chewing him out, I will  _ not _ hesitate to kick you out with an insult and a broom.”

“Thanks Remy.” one of the older men in the back raised his hat as some sort of farewell.

“For what?”

“Entertainment.”

“Of course babes, you all know that I gotchu.” Remy flashed a genuine smile before entering the break room, feeling like the world was about to end.

Roman was sitting in the swivel chair, and Remy’s heart almost swelled.

Almost.

Remy cleared his throat and crossed his arms. “You wanted to talk babe, what’s it about?”

Roman stood and it was in moments like these that Remy was grateful that he was a towering 6’5”, because  _ damn _ , Roman was intimidating.

“I just wanted to apologize for blowing up at you.”

“You could have said that at the bar sugar.”

Roman pouted and Remy once again rolled his eyes.

“I know that Patton invited you to New York for the break and I wanted to make things right with you before we took out my parents.”

“You haven’t told them yet?”

“No.”

“I know that I said that I’d alway be there for you Ro, and I am, but do you understand how much you’ve hurt me by avoiding me? I can’t be there for you if you don’t want me.” Remy looked down and watched as Roman’s shoulders sagged.

“I know.”

And then he pushed past Remy and left.

Well he fucked up.

Remy sat on the floor and buried his face in his hands. Then he wiped away a few tears and stood, heading back out.

He had a job to do, emotions could take a backburner. Everyone had cleared out, like he had asked and that gave Remy the smallest satisfaction that he still held onto some control in his life.

It took him an additional half hour to finish closing up and it was only after he was done and sitting alone in his beater car that he rested his head against the steering wheel and let himself break down.

His phone buzzed and he pulled it out.

It’s_Picani!: my usual group of friends are out being romantic and I’m bored.

Remy snickered at the sadness behind his friend’s words and he shook his head before responding.

Sokka_withA_Latte: That’s because your idea of fun is cartoons.

It’s_Picani!: it  _ is _ fun though!

Sokka_withA_Latte: Babes, you are sad

Sokka_withA_Latte: A sad little nerd man.

It’s_Picani!: You do realize that you’re older than me.

It’s_Picani!: you grandpa

Sokka_withA_Latte: I’m only 25 and a half, that’s like-- three months older than you.

It’s_Picani!: And who has the successful job and a house partly paid off?

Sokka_withA_Latte: Ugh, no wonder all your students think you’re in your thirties. You act like some old guy XDDDDD

It’s_Picani!: I have a bottle of wine and kettle corn, wanna celebrate being single?

Sokka_withA_Latte: what’s the catch?

It’s_Picani!: You have to watch the amazing world of gumball with me.

Sokka_withA_Latte: Can I complain about how I fucked up my second chance with my ex?

It’s_Picani!: Only over wine, I already have a headache from grading papers.

Sokka_withA_Latte: Fair enough, I’ll pick up a pizza on the way over.

It’s_Picani!: It’s almost midnight, no pizza around.

Sokka_withA_Latte: I’ll have Virgil pick a lock open for me.

It’s_Picani!: NO! That boy is on a date and you have gotta let him have a nice Valentines.

It’s_Picani!: Like you could be having if you had forgiven Roman.

Sokka_withA_Latte: you can’t see it, but i’m totally sticking my tongue out at you babes.

Sokka_withA_Latte: see you in a phat minute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I take my latte, binoculars and my phone and sit outside.
> 
> you ask what i'm looking at.
> 
> I hand you my binoculars and point.
> 
> there, on the side of a building, is a small sign.
> 
> you look through the binoculars and read the sign, which only bears two questions:
> 
> kudos?  
> comments?


	14. Calm before the Thunderstorm.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan is ready for spring break.  
> are you?  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yay, we can finally get into the New York plot next chapter! enjoy!
> 
> I have been decked by a backpack before when someone next to me was putting it on. the kid was super apologetic about it and he had an instant ice pack that he gave me to reduce swelling.  
> still got a black eye.

Logan stuffed the notebook into his bag, Virgil on one side of him and Sam on the other, both of them still scrambling to fill out the notes on the whiteboard before they were erased by the professor.

“Logan, how do you write so fast?” Sam stuck her pen in her mouth as she pulled out a bottle of Wite-out, hurriedly fixing a mistake in hers.

“I devoted myself in the learning alternative ways of note taking.”

“He learned shorthand.” Virgil supplied and Sam nodded, almost spilling her Wite-out as Logan’s backpack decked her across the face.

“Lo!”

“Sorry.” Logan deadpanned as he pulled out a portable ice pack.

“Since you’re done with the notes can you go ask what tomorrow’s lecture is gonna be on since we’re leaving tonight?” Virgil hadn’t looked up during the tragedy in two parts and Logan nodded, maneuvering his way down to where the professor was.

“Ma’am, I was wondering what topics the lecture would be covering tomorrow, me and a few friends are leaving early for spring break.”

“Oh, good for you Logan! Heaven knows that you need a break. So where are you heading and with who?” She stopped before she could start erasing the board and Logan was pretty sure that he could feel Virgil’s and Sam’s relief from here.

“One of my roommates purchased tickets to Broadway and invited Sam, Virgil and I to tag along.” Logan gestured behind him and the professor nodded.

“New York is beautiful in the spring. I was going to do a group project assignment to be handed in at the end of the lecture. However, just email me some photos from your trip and I’ll let it slide.”

“Thanks, and I’ll see you on the twenty fifth for when classes resume.” Logan walked back to his friends, who had finally finished copying the notes. Virgil held out his hand for Logan to take and Sam stuck her tongue out at him from where she was nursing one half of her face with the ice pack.

“We’re cleared as long as we get sentimental in New York.”

“Ah memories, the absolute bane of my life.” Virgil muttered and Logan barked out a laugh.

“Don’t worry, I’ll take all the photos, since the nerd’s brickpack is probably gonna leave some bruising.”

“I said that I was sorry  _ and _ gave you an icepack.”

“Lo, I’m being sarcastic. See you two in three hours, I have to go grab Jess, I’ll meet you at the airport.” She gave them both a two fingered salute before walking out, leaving Logan and Virgil alone.

The pair walked outside, hand in hand, in silence until Virgil stopped, which caused Logan to stumble a bit.

“What’s wrong wildcat?”  
“I just keep getting these fucked up texts.” Virgil pulled his hand out of Logan’s and then fished for his phone, pulling it out to show Logan.

“Like, look at this one. ‘I know what it’s like to feel your turmoil, make a choice V.’ Who writes this fortune cookie shit?”

“Language.” Logan reprimanded gently.

“Est-ce que le français travaille pour toi, salaud?” Virgil snapped and Logan took a step back at the change of tone. And the fact that it was in French, how long had Virgil known French?

“How long have they been bothering you?”

“Since February, but I thought that if I blocked them enough, they’d stop.” Virgil admitted and Logan cautiously held out a hand for the phone. After a pause, Virgil handed him the phone and Logan started scrolling through the text threads.

There was one for every roommate, one for Sam, two for Jess due to some glitch, one for Remy that was hovering at the bottom and then---

Oh.

Almost fifteen different numbers had contacted his boyfriend, all with slightly ominous messages ranging from subtle death threats to full on graphic descriptions of torture that made Logan feel sick.

“Is this why you stopped switching our phones?” he asked softly.

“Yeah.”

“Stormcloud, I would have been able to help if I’d known.”

“I didn’t want to make you cancel anything because someone was being a dick with texting. We’re adults, you’d think that we could move past this.” 

Logan folded Virgil into a hug and Virgil rested his head on Logan’s shoulder, a bit awkwardly, but the hug was nice.

Once Logan pulled back, he handed his phone to Virgil.

“I’m not giving you your phone, because I don’t want you looking at those texts but you do need to have some way to communicate. Under normal circumstances, I’d just delete these threads, but the most logical thing to do is go to the police and ask for help and we’re going to need evidence.”

“Police aren’t helpful.”

“No, but it’s kinda our only legal option.” Logan zipped Virgil’s phone into his bag and then they started walking again, the problem seemingly solved.

Temporarily, at least.

Moving five people out of one condo at once is one hell of a chaotic mess. 

“It’s for TWO WEEKS Roman! You don’t need to bring your entire closet!”

“Don’t tell me how to live my life Janus!”

Logan had sensibly packed a single carry on and it had taken all of his convincing skills to have Virgil pack more than a backpack of hoodies and two pairs of pants. There was more to life than packing seven hoodies for a spring trip and it had taken an hour to talk sense into Virgil.

But now they were all piling into an Uber- Logan felt _ really _ bad for this driver- and then they were on their way to the airport.

“Here’s the tickets, make sure you find the one that has your name on it, Janus, they spelt your name as Janice, but I called ahead and they said that it was okay and they’ll let you board.” Patton passed forward an envelope and Logan took a minute to rifle through to find his before passing the envelope to Roman.

“Who’s excited for NEw YoRK!” Roman asked as he took out his ticket and passed the envelope to Virgil, who took out the last ticket.

“I’m excited to spend some time with my friends!”

“I had mace shipped to the AirBNB, it’ll arrive tomorrow and then we go jump Roman’s parents.” 

“Virgil.”

“What?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Est-ce que le français travaille pour toi, salaud?- Does French work for you, bastard?
> 
> Virgl doesn't speak french, he literally learned that sentence to spite Logan. He can say it in spainsh, russian, dutch, scottish, italian, portuguese and in mandrin as well.
> 
> Félicitations et commentaires s'il vous plaît? (kudos and comments please?)


	15. Losing luggage, Losing hope and Losing your best friend.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman confronts his parents.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for multiple homophobic slurs used, violence, roman and remy, mentions of remus, missing bags, mugging, virgil's past life.
> 
> ummm, roman's parents were supposed to be a lot more unsympathetic and then i realized that they put up raising remus and so I slightly overhauled their character development.
> 
> the AirBNB has two guest rooms and one master bedroom, a kitchen/living area and two bathrooms. One guest bedroom has a three bunk bed thing and the other has a twin bed and then a bunk bed. the master bedroom has a queen sized bed. 
> 
> so room situation is in one room Roman, Logan and Patton, in the other Janus, Virgil and soon to be Remy and then Jess and Sam are sharing the queen bed in the master bedroom, while arguing about it the whole time.  
> they've been in new york for three days, it's march 17th

Roman had to physically _fight_ Virgil to pull him away from the mace. It wasn’t a very fair fight to just jump his parents before he had a chance to explain his sexuality. Even if they were probably gonna kick him out of the family, he wanted to go in with a clear mind and a whole lot of false optimism. 

Now he was standing outside the apartment complex in Upper Eastside, waiting for the telltale click so he could enter.

His parents had once been well off, but after literal years of paying for Remus’s messes, they’d moved from their high rise to a simpler apartment in a less expensive area. So now, he was here, standing right out front.

The intercom crackled and his mom’s voice came over the end.

“Is it my Little Prince? You didn’t mention that you were coming back for your birthday!”

“Uh, I’m actually just coming to talk, I have plans for the rest of the week.”

“Oh, come on in!” the door clicked and Roman opened it, entering the complex and working his way to where a familiar red door was.

Before he could knock, his mother had thrown the door open and was hugging him. 

“It’s been too long!”

“I was back during thanksgiving Ma.”

“Still too long. Did I tell you that your brother got released from the asylum? Passed all his tests with flying colors!”

Roman felt a stab of ice cold down his back and he forced a smile as his mother brought him inside to sit at the table. “That’s  _ great _ .”

She offered him a glass of water before sitting down across from him. “So what was it you wanted to tell me?”  
“Um, it’s kinda a you and dad conversation.”

Her eyes widened slightly and she nodded. “I’ll go wake up your father then, he’s been spending so much time sleeping lately.” She stood and left the room, leaving Roman to stare up at the photos lining the walls. The last one that had the whole family together was from almost ten years ago, about a year before the Split.

There was the sound of shuffling footsteps and Roman’s father came into the kitchen, taking a seat next to him and clapping a hand on his shoulder.

“How’s my son?”

“Fine.”

“You’re hiding something, what is it?” His mom slid into her chair across from him and Roman took a deep breath.

“I’ve been meaning to tell you this for awhile--”

“You finally got yourself a girlfriend?”

“Uh, no. The opposite actually.” Roman cringed at how awkward he sounded and he felt his father move his hand away/

“You’re a fag?” There wasn’t any anger in his voice, just confusion, maybe even disbelief.

“Dad, that’s really offensive.” Roman said.

“Flamer?” His dad questioned.

“That’s also very offensive.” 

“Gay?”

“That’s a polite term.”

“Okay, as long as I don’t upset you.”

“You guys aren’t mad?”

His mother wrung her hands out and Roman felt his father’s hand return to his shoulder and they both smiled.

“Well, two weeks ago, we probably would have told you that you were gonna burn in hell and we would have renounced you but---” His mother trailed off and his dad picked up the sentence.

“I was commuting home and I passed a fag getting mugged. I mean, one of your people-- and so I chased off the mugger, and after, I ended up unloading a lot about what had happened the past few years with your brother on him and he listened.”

“That’s it?”

“I thought it was unfair of me to judge based off of something that you’re born with. I’m sorry that you didn’t think that we were a safe place for you to be yourself.” His dad patted him on the shoulder and Roman felt some of the tension leave the room.

“Now, Little Prince, we don’t expect you to completely forgive us, your father and I have said some pretty nasty things about the community, and I’m sure we might slip up in the future, but don’t hesitate to let us know if we need to do something different.”

“Thank you Mom.” Roman reached his hands across the table and she took them, tears glimmering in her eyes.

“Honestly kid, you being gay is a walk in the park compared to your brother’s shit.”

“ _ Dad _ .” Roman laughed softly and his father patted his shoulder again.

…

He left about an hour later, with the slightest bit of bounce in his step. Sure, it wasn’t perfect, his father had said a few slurs from force of habit and his mother had worn a pained smile the first time he mentioned Remy, but it was a step forward in the right direction.

Roman passed Virgil in the stairwell once he made it back to the AirBNB. The emo was carrying cinnamon and a plastic bag of green apples down the stairs and he took off his headphones to talk to him.

“What’s the apples for?”

“I’m visiting an old friend.” Virgil held up the cinnamon and shook it. “We have a tradition of making pastry.”

“Pastry?”

“I have cold hands and she doesn’t. All I do is the easy part.”

“Cool. Can I come?”

“Uhh, I haven’t seen her in almost three years and I couldn’t call ahead, so I think we’ll have to raincheck Ro. I promise to tell her about you though.” Virgil went to put his headphones back on when Roman stopped him with a question.

“What’s her name?”

“Abigail. She’s just a really nice old lady.”

“I wish you luck in your pastry quest.”

Virgil laughed and put on his headphones and Roman continued walking up the stairs, stumbling to the couch once he’s inside.

“I did it guys!”

“Did what exactly Roman, you kinda left without telling anyone.” Sam was sitting in a loveseat, dressed in yoga pants from her sister, a pair of socks from Patton, one of Logan’s polos and the smallest of Virgil’s hoodies. She had been wearing Roman’s tank top earlier that morning, but until her lost luggage was found, she was stuck borrowing clothes from everyone.

“I told my parents that I was gay.”

“Ah, well, welcome to the found family.”

“They were okay with it.”

“Bitch, you’re telling me that the past eight months of Remy drama have all gone to waste?” Sam adjusted the way that she was sitting in the loveseat so that she could look at him properly without snapping her neck.

“No, my father admitted that up until a few weeks ago, he would’ve renounced me.”

“Wow. So are you going to tell Remy when he comes?”

“Are you going to find your lost bag?”

“Probably not with my luck.” Sam pulled out her phone and started to play a video game, seemingly done with the conversation.

“I am going to tell him.”

“Great Ro, you should call him right now, I’m about to get a high score in Temple Run, so go talk on the balcony.”

Roman rolled his eyes but got up, retreating to the room that he was sharing with Logan and Patton.

It was a three bunk bed room and he had claimed the top bunk (obviously) and he sat up on it, surveying the room below as he hit call.

Remy’s voice sounded tired and Roman looked at his phone to see that it was almost three in the afternoon, which meant that it was fine that he’d called.

“Long time no call babes, what’s up?”

“I wanted to apologize for Valentine’s Day.”

“Me too honey. Is that everything?”

“I told my parents.”

Remy laughed on the other end and Roman smiled, even though he knew that Remy couldn’t see it.

“So, when are you moving in? All your stuff isn’t gonna fit in that tiny ass room of yours.”

“They didn’t kick me out.”

“Come again babe? I think the line faded.”

“My dad had a change of heart and he’s okay with us.” Roman smiled again and he kicked his feet happily when Remy’s excited squeal came over the line.

“You’re so lucky! Sugar, do you realize how much I’ve been pining since you left? It’s so hard to pretend to hate you babes.”

“I know. I love you Remy.”

“Oh and Ro?”

“Yeah?”

“You’ve been on speaker this whole time, the whole bar just heard you.”

Roman blushed as the whooping came through, and he had to pull the phone away from his ear, the cheers were so deafening.

“Love you Babes, see you in three days! I gotta get back to work!” Remy hung up before Roman could get the last word and he collapsed backward on the bed, kicking his legs excitedly.

“So it went well, I’m guessing?” Janus had somehow slipped into the room during the call and Roman let out an undignified scream before he realized who it was.

“DUDE!”

“I’m just asking.”

“It went great! I have a boyfriend back!” Roman hopped down and swooped Janus into a hug, laughing as Janus freaked out a bit, cane swinging as he tried to escape Roman’s grip.

“Put me down!”

“Okay Shortstack.”

“I’m not short!” Janus protested and he tapped Roman on the top of his head with his cane, as if that proved that he wasn’t the shortest in the group.

“Whatever, let’s go out into the living room before you break something that we don’t own.” Roman strode past Janus and they went back to the living room, where Sam had once again shifted how she was sitting, this time sitting basically upside down.

“Hey guys, Patton and Logan should be back soon and Jess went to pick up my bags, the airport finally found it.”

“Cool, do we know when Virgil will be back?”

“Nope, but maybe in an hour or two? I’m not sure how long his friend visit will be. TBH, I’m kinda surprised that he even had a friend here after all the horror story vibes he gave about this place.” Sam switched so that she was once again right side up, looking dizzy.

The door opened at that and Logan and Patton came in, holding bags of groceries.

“Help.”

…

Virgil was exiting the subway when they jumped him. Three people around his age, flanking him and pushing him so that he was in an alley.

“I should’ve known that I’d get mugged.” He deadpanned as he pulled out his wallet and handed over Logan’s phone.

“What’s in the bag?”

“Cinnamon and apples, you can have it if you want, but it’s worth like ten dollars max.”

“Name?”

“Why do you care?” Virgil held up his hands as one pulled out a knife, waving it threateningly under his nose.

“Okay, I get it, you must have a thing against purple haired emos. I’m Virgil, and you...”

“It’s him.”

Before Virgil could ask as to why they were looking for him specifically, the fist was across his face, knocking him out cleanly.

…

“It’s been almost seven hours, it’s not like him to stop answering texts and calls.” Logan was pacing across the floor and just watching him gave Roman a headache.

“He’s probably just-- ” Patton trailed off and Roman looked at the pizza boxes littering the coffee table that Jess was leaned up against, seemingly having a telepathic conversation with her sister.

“Logan’s right, we need to try calling the phone again.” Roman stood and went to get his phone from the room he was staying in.

It was while he was digging through his bag, looking for a charger when the blood-curdling scream came from the living room.

Roman dropped his bag and ran back out, just in time to see Logan throwing Virgil’s phone, gosh everything was harder when they switched, and Patton holding back a Janus that had a positively _murderous_ look on his face.

“Yo, what the hell is going on?”  
Sam crawled forward and picked up the phone before looking at it and dropping it again. Roman sighed and walked forward, and picked it up.

“Don’t look Ro.” Logan’s voice was hoarse and he looked as if he aged ten years. "It makes it real."

“What’s happening?”

Then he looked at the phone and swore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> i'm really, really sorry.


	16. The polaroid problem.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil wakes up and he's still a little shit, no captor's going to break him like this.  
> Roman has to deal with the weight of his best friend missing and the fact that he could've prevented it.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warnings: remus, Q, threats, police being the idiots they are and refusing to help, mugging, non sexual bondage, cold water, memory repression, swearing, bruising, loss of consciousness, non con touch, implications of a false relationship, gaslighting, manipulation.
> 
> ah poor virgil and roman in the upcoming chapters. It's going to be bouncing back and forth between virgil and roman's perspectives for a bit.

Virgil woke up to cold water getting thrown across him. How cliche, he thought as a towel was also thrown at him, which was slightly less normal, but as he tried to catch it, he realized it was just a joke.

His wrists were tied to the arms of a strangely nice chair.

“Heyyy V.”

Virgil looked up and squinted. “Do I know you?”

“Of course, it’s just your fault that you don’t remember. I did team up with an old friend of yours for this though.” Whoever had it out for him wasn’t in his line of sight, but when the ‘friend’ came into view, Virgil swore and did a half jump thing in an attempt to move the chair.

“Remus.”

“Hey Stormcloud.” Remus giggled and pulled up a stool, sitting across from Virgil, who leaned his head back.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Or what? You’ll be mad at me? You’re the one who’s all in the hostage situation here.”

“Remus, let’s not scare him too badly before he knows what’s going on.” 

That voice, Virgil could feel it tickling in the back of his long repressed memories and he shook his head, trying to remember something, anything.

“Can I get a hint?” He asked and to his surprise, whoever was behind him passed a small square of paper to Remus.

“There’s your one hint V.”

Remus cackled when he looked at the paper and he shoved it too close to Virgil’s face for him to be able to make out what it had on it. But the smell…

The chemical smell of a developed polaroid.

Ah fuck.

…

Meanwhile, back at an AirBNB, Roman was staring at a photo on a phone, trying not to have a panic attack because it was Logan’s turn for that and so he needed to be strong until they figured out the next step.

Why hadn’t he pushed harder to go with Virgil? They had  _ no _ leads on where he could be,  _ no _ idea who had him, although Roman had a few lurking suspicions based on the fact that it was New York and Virgil had told him a few things about his past, but it  _ wasn’t _ enough.

There was a hand grabbing his elbow and someone pulled him out of the room.

“Prince, what do you know.”

“What?” Roman looked at Sam, who levelled him with a steely glare.

“You know something and I can tell.”

“I don’t know anything other than a few bits that Virgil and I talked about. He said that he was going to visit an old friend before he left, but he didn’t say where and I didn’t think that he had any friends here, but--”

“Roman, I get it. Stop talking and hand me the phone.” Sam held out her hand and he begrudgingly handed it over.

“Whoever did this is sick and twisted.” Roman muttered as Sam turned off the phone.

“Yeah, but until the police show up, there’s not really anything we can do.” Sam crossed her arms and gave a half shrug. “Unless..”

“Unless what?”  
“Do you think it could be your brother?”

“He was barely released from asylum, there’s no way he could have the resources available to afford the chair that’s in the photo.”

The photo in question was sent from an unknown number and it showed an unconscious Virgil tied to a chair that was way too nice for the location that it appeared to be.

There was noise from the main room and Roman and Sam went out to see that two police officers had shown up.

“How long has he been missing?” One officer, a middle aged woman, was writing in a notebook while interviewing the group.

“Eight hours, twenty-two minutes and seventeen seconds.” Logan had calmed down at this point and it scared Roman at how carefully blank his face was, sounding almost robotic as he answered the questions.

“And you have proof that he’s not just pranking you?”

“Someone sent a photo.”

“Can we see it?”

“Of course.”

Sam passed the phone and after a minute, one of the officers shrugged and handed it back.

“We can’t do anything for twenty four hours.”

“Did you not see the death threats? He is in danger and legally you can step in, it’s a probable cause.” 

Roman could see the veins that were starting to stand out in his friend’s neck and he moved forward and put a hand on Logan’s shoulder to ground him.

“Can you at least put out a thing so that you’ll be on the lookout until you can be fucking useful.” Janus hissed and the officers stepped back, promising that they’d be back tomorrow.

Once the door was shut, Logan stormed out of the room and Patton followed, leaving Roman, Sam, Janus and Jess to stare at each other.

“Do you think Logan will be okay?” Jess asked timidly.

“No. But I need to call Remy and then my parents and I encourage you guys to do the same. I have a bad feeling that Spring Break isn’t going to go as planned.”

…

Of course.

Virgil fucking hated his luck sometimes. Remus had left a few minutes ago, leaving the polaroid on the stool so that he could stare at it and be upset that the universe was still out to get him. 

He rested his chin against his chest, which was still wet and sighed.

“I really do have a shitty life.”

“You wouldn’t’ve if you had stayed V.” The voice came from somewhere behind him and Virgil realized that they had never actually left the room like Remus.

“Shut up Q.”

“Ooh, you finally remembered. Can I untie you now, or would you still run off?” 

“I’d kick you in the balls and then run, so it’s probably best you keep me how I am.” Virgil tried to look over his shoulder, but couldn’t see anything.

“Still as snarky as you were senior year. I missed that.”

“Whatever.”

“You really _ haven’t _ changed. Still cutting?” Q asked, false sympathy dripping off his words and he stood and walked over.

“I stopped cutting six months before I escaped this hell hole of a city. Not that you care Q.”

“But there’s a bunch of neat scars on your hand. Razor thin scars.” Q finally came into Virgil’s line of sight, kneeling down so they were face to face. “I was worried for you.”

“No you weren’t.” Virgil said bluntly.

“Aw, but I  _ was _ Stormy.”

“Don’t call me that.” 

“Right, no more pet names. Wouldn’t want you to feel disloyal to your boyfriend after all.” Q placed a hand over Virgil’s scarred one and grinned. “Wouldn’t want your boyfriend being jealous of your ex.”

“We went on one date that literally went nowhere Q,  _ grow up _ .”

“Hmm, I’d really punch you right now, but we still have a few steps that need to be completed before I can.”

Virgil’s blood ran cold and he tried to pull his hand away, anxiety crawling up his throat. 

“What do you mean?”

“We still have to lure one more person here V. You’re not the only hated person in your group.”

Virgil connected the dots and his eyes widened. “Roman. I was trying to figure out why you decided to team up with Remus, oh my go--”

“That’s enough theorizing V. See you tomorrow.” Q stood and left, turning off the lights of the room, plunging Virgil into cold darkness.

Virgil counted to ten thousand before he started to untie the ropes. You didn’t live in an abusive household without coming out with some useful skills and now that Q had figuratively snapped the dam that had been holding back his repressed memories, he was back in business.

The door was locked.

Shit.

…

Roman woke up at three am to his phone buzzing. He had been lying on the couch and when he saw that it was an Unknown number, he sat up and quickly answered it, almost declining the call in the process.

“Who are you?”

“No one special.” 

“Liar. You’re either a telemarketer or the person who has my best friend, so which is it?” Roman hissed as he stood and moved to the hallway outside the AirBNB.

“Oh, I’m V’s friend.”

“I doubt that. What’s your name.”

“You can call me the Polaroid Problem Ro, if you wish to give me a name.”

“How am I supposed to destroy you if you won’t give me a name!”

“See, the problem Roman, is that if I give you my name, then you’ll go to the police and I won’t get my revenge. And you’ll lose your Stormcloud.”

Roman growled. “He’s not my Stormcloud, he’s my friend.”

“Course, my mistake. As I was saying, sure you can call the police, but then I’d just kill Virgil before anyone could do anything about it. You’re friend, what was it? Logan? He would be crushed.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me Roman.” The voice drolled boredly.

Roman paused his pacing, and he held the phone away from his face long enough to let some creative cursing loose before putting it back.

“What’s the price.”

“People are priceless.” 

“You know what I meant.”

“You’ll see Roman. Ta-ta! And if you tell anyone about this call…. Well, we all know where that can go.”

The call disconnected with a click and he was left alone in the hallway, more worried than before. Chaotic Remus was dealable. He could kinda predict his twin’s mood swings and Remus was more of a jump-someone-in-an-alley-and-rob-them-blind kind of person. 

Polaroid Problem knew how to play a long game.

Roman stood in the hall for a bit longer before going inside. As much as he wanted to wake everyone and tell them that Virgil was alive, and unharmed(?), he couldn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh, enjoy?
> 
> kudos and comments?


	17. At an all time Lo(gan)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan snaps, goes catatonic, rinse, repeat.  
> Sam grasps at straws.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings: Q, non sexual bondage, Remus, hot coffee, logan being mad, themes of starvation, strangulation, duct tape, manipulation, mentions of police, sam being badass, stalking, Q, sad boi logan hours, mentions of past accidents, did i mention Q?
> 
> phonographic memory is a thing! I have it, and like sam, if I tune out, then I forget, but for the most part, I remember everything I've ever heard.

Logan had been up since five am, looking around the city with Patton and Jess. He had insisted on waking up early and leaving and it was only through the convincing of Roman and Janus that he’d brought people along.

It made sense, logically, with this mysterious abductor and so the buddy system would be imperative to their safety, instead of running blindly into the city and hoping that he’d be okay.

It was ten am, and they’d only covered three city blocks, looking down every alley, talking to store owners and street vendors.

Logan hated it. He was supposed to wake up late this morning, walk out to the kitchen and see Virgil drinking coffee like there was no tomorrow and then they were supposed to have a nice day and maybe go out to get Roman a birthday present.

They were walking back to the AirBNB now, Patton cracking jokes about how this was way too competitive for a game of hide and seek and Logan wanted to throttle him, but he knew that Patton was just trying to diffuse the tension that was being caused by the situation.

Once they got inside, they were greeted by omelets and Sam and Roman on the couch, a map spread between them as Roman highlighted areas in pink.

“Any calls or texts while we were out?”

Janus shook his head from where he was manning the stove. “Nothing.”

Logan swore under his breath and sat down at the table, not touching any of the food that was available. 

It was illogical to not eat, but if Virgil wasn’t, he wasn’t.

“What’s our next step. We need to make a plan before blindly going out again. Print off missing flyers, hire someone who’s good at finding people--”

“Logan, calm down and eat something.”

“I am calm.” Logan was, and when he looked up to see that the group was staring at him, he drew his face into a careful blank. “I want to be as effective as possible until Virgil is found.”

“Which also means you need to eat Logan. You’re running on fumes and anger, which in my personal experience, is not the way to go.” Janus slid a fresh omelet to him and Logan reluctantly picked up a fork and started eating.

He was about halfway through his meal before the phone started ringing. The place was in chaos in a second, everyone scrambling into the living room.

Sam had been given phone custody- honestly she was the only one who hadn’t had a mental breakdown in the past sixteen hours, and she hadn’t spent time sharpening knives like Janus, so she was deemed the phone holder.

She swiped to answer and put it on speaker, setting it down on the coffee table, over the highlighted map of New York.

“You’re on speaker bitch, so watch yourself.” Logan didn’t care that Patton’s gasp overlapped the phone voice’s laughter, but he did care when they started to speak, so he waved a hand in a vague ‘shut up’ motion at his friend.

…

Sam was not expecting Roman to flinch violently when the voice started talking.

“I’ll watch myself, just like I’ve been watching you guys for the past year.” 

“Who are you.” Logan’s voice was ice cold and Sam watched as he clenched his fists and narrowed his eyes at the phone.

“An old friend of Stormcloud.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Pity. I  _ could _ just hang up. I know that you’re not recording this call, and that the police have brushed it off as just a prank, so I’d think that you guys would want to listen to me.”

Could you describe a phone voice as smug? It sounded like the person on the other end was definitely smirking and she hated it.

“Anyway, would you like to talk to him?”

Sam almost gave a relieved yes, but Patton beat her to it, relief and tears choking the sound of his voice.

“There was an...  _ incident  _ last night and our dear Virgil almost got away, so apologies at the fact that he’s a bit more restrained than originally shown.” The voice said as the sound of ripping duct tape was heard.

Sam put a hand over her mouth and looked up at her sister, who’s eyes were wide as she stood silently and walked out.

As much as she wanted to go after Jess, she decided to stay and listen.

There was the sound of jostling, a weird echoing sound and then gasping.

“Guys, where’s Roman?” Virgil’s panicked voice came over the phone and Roman leaned forward, looking confused as to why he’d been requested.

“I’m right--”

“Okay, listen, I don’t have-- oof, time, but Roman, whatever they say don’t”

The line cut off and they were left with silence, staring at each other.

“ _ What was that about. _ ” Logan surged to his feet and stepped over the coffee table, grabbing Roman by the front of his shirt and lifting him with a surprising amount of strength. “Why did he choose to single you out!”

“I don’t know!”

“I can tell when someone is lying Roman, don’t test me.” Logan slammed him against the wall and Sam jumped up, moving back from the pair.

There was something dangerous in Logan’s eyes, a whirlwind of anger and pain that was moments from boiling over and spilling out.

“Lolo..”

“Shut up Patton!”

Sam walked forward and put a hand on Logan’s shoulder, fully expecting him to mow her down with a glare or to push her back.

Instead, he looked down at her and let go of Roman’s shirt, letting him drop to the couch.

“You’re hurt, but doing this isn’t going to help Lo.”

He went to say something, but the anger was fading from his eyes and then soon they were completely blank. Sam pulled him into a hug, and he didn’t respond, arms hanging limply at his sides.

It was scary.

He’d been like this before, after the first accident, and it worried her just as much this time as it had before.

Sure, he’d been a  _ bit _ robotic when they’d first met, laying out clearly that he was gay and only interesting in being a study partner due to the fact that they had a few classes together, but at least he was honest. And the way that he lit up when he was talking about something he was passionate about proved that she wasn’t friends with a robot, which was a good thing, but now he was almost catatonic.

“Come on Logan, let’s go for a walk.” She pulled out of the hug and grabbed his hand, tugging him gently towards the door.

“Roman, go check on my sister.”

Then, she opened the door and dragged them out to go get coffee or something, because she needed a break from reality, even if it was just for ten minutes.

...

Logan gripped the coffee with one hand, the other holding a pen as Sam opened a notebook and unfolded a map in one fluid motion.

“Just like when we were first studying together.” She gave him a pained smile and he nodded.

“I remember the first time, when you spilled gatorade all over the table and we had to move.”

“I forgot about that! So, this is a fresh map, and I was thinking that we mark spots that are higher crime, which seems like a place to go missing.”

“We don’t have any leads.”

“We have a sort of lead. I talked to Roman and he said that Virgil was visiting an old woman somewhere in the area. So if we try to find a location that’s high crime and has a bunch of old people, maybe we could get a clue.”

“That’s illogical.”

“It’s the only idea I have. I’ve been trying to think of all my New York accents to see who the phone guy might be, but they kept their voice neutral and held back any slang.”

“So we have a map and a notebook and no leads.” Logan said dryly before he took a small sip of the coffee.

Sam looked up and frowned. “I know we didn’t record the call, but I have a perfect phonographic memory and so we’re gonna take advantage of that, so be quiet for a moment while I work my magic.”

Logan sat silently while she wrote down the entire phone call, somehow drawing from memory multiple parts that Logan had forgotten about.

“You never mentioned phonographic memory.”

“Yeah, how do you think I memorize all the covers my band plays? I listen once, and then boom, got it forever.”

“Why do you take notes during the lectures?”

“I get bored and zone out if I’m not actively listening and note taking.” Sam handed him the notebook and he looked at the penned conversation sadly.

“Why didn’t he try to talk to me?” He whispered, and a few tears forced their way out, dripping down and landing on the paper.

“Logan, look at me. Virgil’s obviously figured something out, otherwise he wouldn’t’ve tried to escape or warn Roman. Trust me, if anyone is going to remain okay during this, it’s going to be him.” Sam’s voice was reassuring, but Logan only felt worse.

“Sure. Let’s go call the police,  _ again _ .”

“That’s the Logan we all know and love!”

He forced a smile and they stood and left, the ‘break’ over. Sam gathered up the map and Logan closed the notebook, sticking the highlighter behind his ear as he took his half full coffee to throw away.

Someone crashed into him, and the drink spilled.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry that was totally me!” A guy about his age was stumbling back, face flushed red from embarrassment.

He was shorter than Logan and with a light tenor voice. Logan blushed when he realized that the person had assumed that he was upset for an accident. 

“What you did is inconsequential, neither of us got spilled on and I’m sure an employee will make sure that I can take care of the mess.” 

“No, no, I’ll clean it up, it’s pretty clear that you were in a hurry. Just remember that us New Yorkers are nice sometimes.” He gave Logan a shy smile and Logan nodded gratefully before rejoining Sam.

“Who was that?”

“I have no idea.”

…

Virgil felt bored.

Remus had come in at six am with food and after a very brief fight, one that Remus had won, he was tied up again and denied the food and a strip of duct tape had been put over his mouth for good measure.

Q had come in sometime during the haze, and when Virgil realized that he was on the phone, he decided to warn Roman about the problem if he got the chance.

He had.

Ish.

Now he was alone again, tired and kinda wishing that he had some water. The door opened for the third time that day and Q came in, smiling, which worried Virgil more than he wanted to admit.

“I met your boyfriend.”

Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Don’t believe me?”

Virgil wished that he had licked the duct tape off, because he had had the time and if he had, maybe he could have quipped something back.

Alas, he was still mute.

“I have a photo.” Q pulled out his phone, an older model and he scrolled until he found what he was looking for.

“Here.” 

Sure enough, it was a picture of Logan and Sam at a cafe of sorts, a map spread on the table they were sitting at. You couldn’t see Logan’s face, and half of Sam’s was obscured by her thick hair, but Virgil knew it was them.

“Told you. Anyway, see you in a few days, I have some planning to do. If you’re good, Remus won’t starve you.” Q ruffled Virgil’s mess of hair and left, this time leaving the light on, which was the nicest thing he’d done in the past day.

Once the door had shut, Virgil finally let himself cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just keep hurting ya'll
> 
> kudos and comments?


	18. Honestly, this would be so much better if we just communicated.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton calls a familiar friend.  
> Janus holds the only braincell of the group.  
> Roman makes a choice.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> janus: ngl, if you take away my walking, i will prohibit your breathing  
> roman: lmao, yoink

Patton was lying wide awake in the bunk bed.

Two days.

Two fucking days without a single idea of where Virgil was. Patton turned over in the bed and wrapped his blanket closer around himself.

They’d finally managed to convince the police to put out a lookout and he was pretty sure that half of the city was covered in the missing posters that they’d printed out.

But still, it didn’t feel like enough. Patton tightened himself into a ball, and he tried to shut out the thoughts that whispered that a quarter of all abduction cases went cold and that over half ended in homicide and so the chances of them finding Virgil before something went horribly wrong were slim to none.

He kept on the optimistic side though, when Logan’s coldness seeped in and Janus’s blatant pessimism kept things painfully real.

That was Patton’s job, to bring in the happy. Him and Jess called it their tag teaming job and they had both been run into the ground over the past few days, trying to keep the smallest semblance of hope alive.

Patton crawled out of bed and dropped to the floor silently, taking his phone with him as he went to the small balcony that the AirBNB had.

Once he’d dialled the number that Picani had given him, he felt a bit better.

“Hello? Picani speaking. It’s midnight, and Spring Break, and I gave this number to my patients for emergencies only, so what’s up?” Picani sounded groggy, like he’d just woken up and grabbed his phone to respond.

“Hi, it’s Patton.”

“How’s my fellow He-Man fan?”

“Uh, I don’t know if you heard yet, but my friend got kidnapped, or abducted, I don’t know which one is more right.”

“Ah, I’m sorry to hear. I think Remy might’ve mentioned it. Virgil, right?”

“Yeah.”

“So you called for some midnight therapy. I’m happy to be of service.”

“I was just hoping that you’d tell me that everything was gonna be okay.” Patton muttered and there was a beat of silence on the other end.

“Patton… I can’t promise that as much as I’d like to.”

“I know Dr. Picani, but I can’t be the optimist right now and everyone’s counting on me to be hopeful and  _ I can’t. _ ” Patton started to cry and he almost dropped the phone in the process.

“Okay, what I’m about to do is really illegal, but I think you need to hear it.”

“You shouldn’t do illegal things.”

“Hush, I’m trying to help. And it’s not that illegal, I’m just breaking patient confidentiality.”

“ _ Picani _ .”

“Shh, Virgil won’t mind. I’m just gonna say that he valued his friends. Called you guys his family. Whenever he could hype you guys up, he did, always talking about all the antics and jokes.”

Patton sniffed. “Really?”

“Yep. And I’m sure that however hard you guys are working to find him, he’s on the other end of the rope, doing the exact same thing, trying to get back to you.”

“Thanks. I really needed to hear that.”

“I’d say anytime, but Patton, I really need to get some sleep before I finish grading a bunch of exams. Go rest so you can be there for each other tomorrow. Or today I guess.”

“Sorry for calling so early.”

“You get used to it when you hand out your personal number to a bunch of college kids.”

Patton hung up and leaned against the balcony railing, looking down at the empty street below. He sighed quietly, enjoying the sounds of the city and waiting for the light pollution to fade as the sun came up.

Virgil had called him family. And Patton would do anything for his family, and if that meant being the happy go-lucky one during this, he would.

…

Janus heard Patton get up and then maybe ten minutes later, the sounds of Roman getting up.

Something was up.

So he got up, it was a lot easier for him, he wasn’t really sharing a room with anyone until tomorrow when Remy would be arriving after driving for sixteen hours straight because he had claimed to have never flown before and he wasn’t gonna start now.

Janus snuck out to the living room, seeing that Patton was on the phone out on the small balcony and by how Roman’s shoes weren’t by the door, that he was either in the hall or had left all together.

He creeped up to the front door and opened it silently.

Roman was talking to someone on the phone, voice low enough not to disturb anyone in their apartments, but Janus could hear him arguing and then a passionate ‘fuck’ as the call must’ve disconnected.

While Roman was swearing, Janus slipped out and walked up, silently waiting for Roman to notice.

After a few moments, he gave up and tapped Roman on the shoulder with his cane.

“Holy fuck Janus.” Roman hissed.

“Who are you calling?”

“No one special.”

“Do I even need to call you a liar right now, or can we skip that?”

“Okay, fine, but you have to come down a flight of stairs before I tell you anything.”

Janus narrowed his eyes at Roman but he didn’t see any harm in doing it, so they slowly walked down a flight of stairs.

“Are you wearing your leg brace?”

“No, I have my cane for a reason. I didn’t have time to put it on before sneaking after you.”

“I’m really sorry about this.”

Before Janus could react, Roman had swept his legs out from under him, and grabbed his cane. Janus collapsed to the ground, mostly from surprise and he looked up at Roman, annoyance flashing across his face.

“Dude, what’s this about?”

“If I’m not back, assume the worst okay?”

“Roman, you didn’t answer my question.” Janus put one hand on the wall and pulled himself up, the exertion already making him feel lightheaded.

“I got a call from the phone guy and he said that if I gave myself up, then he’d give Virgil back.”

“It’s a trap Roman.”

“He promised.”

“You can’t negotiate with terrorists. Give me my cane, we’ll go upstairs and tell everyone what happened and then we’ll get some help with the authorities. Where did he tell you to go?” Janus held out his hand expectantly and Roman shook his head.

“Sorry Janus. Elevators won’t turn on until three am I think? Sorry for stealing your cane, it’ll be by the mail slots.” Roman left him there and Janus wanted to yell after him, but the stairwell was echoey and he didn’t want to get thrown into jail for breaking the noise curfew. That wasn’t another problem that they needed to stack on top of their ever growing pile of problems.

So he sat and waited for the morning.

…

“Anyone seen Roman or Janus?” Patton asked as he flipped a pancake and Jess accidentally poured a glass of water on her face.

“I haven’t seen either of them and Janus left his phone and leg brace here, which is kinda odd, but okay.” Sam walked into the kitchen and shrugged as she grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl and opened it.

“That’s weird. It’d make sense if he went out minus the cane, but he needs the brace to walk.” Jess fumbled for paper towels and she started to clean up the mess as he continued to make pancakes.

Patton put down the spatula. “There’s something wrong. Someone go check the stairs and I’ll go wake up Logan.”

By the time he’d gotten Logan up, Sam and Jess were back, helping a very pissed off Janus walk over to the couch.

“Where were you?”

“Stuck in a stairwell all night because Roman is a fucking idiot. My cane’s by the mail slots downstairs, can someone go get it so I may go find Roman.”

“So where’s Roman?”

“Now, that.” Janus waved his hand dramatically at Logan’s question. “Is something that I’d like to know as well.”

“So now we’re missing two people?”

“And I thought that our luck couldn’t get any worse.”

…

Roman really should’ve listened to Janus.

He woke up in a cleaning closet, hands tied together and duct tape wrapped around his ankles so that he couldn’t move more than scooting towards the door, running into mops and a few dustpans.

The door opened and a person walked in, grabbing Roman by his hair and dragging him out. They basically dropped him at the feet of another person, who crouched down and gave a warm smile.

“Hello Roman. I’m Q.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos?  
> remy's gonna be so pissed when he finds out.


	19. How clueless and trusting can you get?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman gets dupped and the long game begins.  
> remy arrives.  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahh, so we get some Q backstory  
> TW: Q, Remus, asylum, mugging, non sexual bondage, duct tap, themes of starvation, manipulation.

He’d lost count of the hours since Remus had last come in. Being stuck in a windowless room really screwed with your sense of time. Virgil idly rocked the chair back a bit, wishing that it wasn’t as heavy as it was.

Q hadn’t visited since the whole thing where he mentioned that he was casually stalking Logan and that was slightly worrying to Virgil.

Maybe if he tipped the chair, someone would come in.

…

Roman looked at Q, confused.

“I’m sorry, who are you?”

“Quinn Turnbeck. I saw you getting jumped in an alley and so me and my friend stepped in and stopped them.” 

“Why am I tied up?”

“Well, you weren’t and then you got a really psycho phone call while you were unconscious and I answered it and then I realized that it’d probably freak you out if you woke up in a place where you thought that I was hostile--”

“You didn’t want to get beat up, I understand.” Roman struggled up so he was in a more dignified sitting position and he held out his hands. “Untie me?”

“Sure. But I wanna talk after, because there’s no way in hell that I’m letting you back out onto the streets.”

Roman went to ask why, when a massive crashing sound came from another room, followed by a bloodcurdling scream. Quinn stood and cursed, running out of the room and Roman was left alone for a long five minutes.

When he came back, he had sharp scissors that he used to cut the duct tape and ropes that were holding Roman captive.

“Sorry, that was my dumbass of a roommate, he fell back in his chair.”

“Is he okay?” Roman asked as he rubbed at his sore wrists.

“Oh yeah, wanna meet him? Re, get out here and meet Roman!” Quinn offered Roman a seat at the cheap table and then sat on the counter behind him as Re came in.

“Hi! I’m-- Oh, it’s you.” 

“Remus?” Roman asked incredulously.

Remus had cleaned up since they’d last seen each other over a year ago. He’d shaved off the mustache and was fully clothed in normal sleepwear and he stared at Roman with shock.

“It’s actually Re now, just so I don’t regress into… old habits.” Remus admitted as he sat down across from his brother, shyly looking down.

“You two know each other?” Quinn asked and Roman nodded.

“He’s my twin.”

“Re, why didn’t you say anything?” Quinn jumped down the counter and joined them at the table.

“Q, you know where we met?”

“In the-- oh.” Quinn (Q?) trailed off and Roman shot a curious glance at him.

“Yeah.” Remus laughed softly and reached at hand for Q to hold,

“Can I ask how you two met?”

Remus lit up and Quinn smiled. 

“My law enforcement class was visiting the asylum for a project about felons who were mentally unstable.”

“And I threw my food at you because I thought you were hot! It was totally worth the three hours of solitary confinement.” Remus puffs up proudly at the fact and Quinn shakes his head in a way that reminds Roman of Logan with Virgil…

“Anyway, I ended up dropping law enforcement, police are stupid yanno? Started going to film school, volunteering at the asylum so I could see Re... and then when I found out he was getting released for good behavior and lack of insanity so to speak, I asked him to be my roommate, because heaven knows that living in New York ain’t cheap.”

Quinn finished the story with a laugh and Roman was dumbfounded at how domesticated his brother seemed to be, like he was genuinely happy and not just crazy.

Roman remembered why he’d been panicking earlier and he cleared his throat. “Guys? Can you tell me why it’s not safe for me to leave?”

“I said that while you were out, your phone got a call from a number that said if you went back to where your friends were, they wouldn’t hesitate to take care of him. And I think that they weren’t meaning it in a good way.”

“Where’s my phone?”

“I threw it out the window.” Remus shrugged apologetically, “Sorry Ro.”

Roman put his face in his hands. “Gosh, I’m such an idiot, Virgil’s probably gonna die because of this.”

Quinn let go of Remus’s hand to gently grab Roman’s wrist. “What do you mean? Who’s Virgil?”

Roman sighed. Even though he didn’t want to explain to his brother and apparently his brother’s boyfriend/roommate about the whole thing, especially since he’d literally just met them and Quinn had had him tied up in a closet, but there was something trusting about him that made Roman tell.

When he finished his story, Quinn and Remus were both mirrored faces of shock and disgust.

“That’s awful.”

“Horrendous.”

“Is there any way we can help? It doesn’t sound safe for you to go out, but I can take a note to your friends. It’s probably not best to send Re.”

“Thanks.”

“No problem Roman, you’re welcome to stay here as long as you need, which sounds like it might be awhile with how cold this case sounds.” Quinn stood and Remus followed him.

“You can stay in the guest room, which is really just the couch in the office, but I digress.” Remus sighed and Quinn elbowed him affectionately.

“Re, there are kinder ways to advertise our trash apartment.”

As nervous Roman was to be lacking in communication, he relaxed and followed the pair to the small office, stopping by the mop closet to grab a blanket and a pillow.

“Thanks so much.”

“Yep. Oh, the neighbors can get kinda loud.” Quinn smiled at Roman one last time before closing the door and leaving Roman alone.

“What a nice guy.” Roman said to no one in particular as he got comfortable on the small couch.

…

Remy stormed into the AirBNB, normally well put together outfit a mess and his eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep and driving for almost a full day.

“Hi sluts, where’s my bitch so I can punch him?”

Patton jumped up from the couch and he shot a look at Remy. “Kiddo, I think that you need a latte of sleep before you do anything.”

“Please don’t pun at me girl, I cannot deal right now.” 

“You should really get some rest though.”

Remy shook his head and pulled another Redbull out of his leather messenger bag. “Nope.”

He opened the energy drink and then added a five hour energy to it-- gosh he loved Virgil for giving him all these recipes-- and downed it to the absolute horror of Patton.

“Give me a minute for the caffeine to hit and then we can cover the city in ten minutes.” Remy flashed a confident smile, took a step forward and passed out cold.

Logan came in, no doubt attracted by the sound of a man collapsing onto tile and when he saw Remy, his mouth quirked up into a smile.

“Interesting. I wonder if we drew a blood sample, that there would be more caffeine than blood.”

Remy didn’t even protest when they carried him to the bed and dumped him in to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quinn and Remus have no relationship, they're both crazy, Quinn's just a better actor and he's had a lot more time to plan Virgil revenge. He helped Remus learn how lie to pass the tests required to get out of jail.
> 
> oh yeah, it was virgil who was the crashing sound and the scream, Q went back to knock him out so that when Remus entered the room to 'meet' Roman, nothing would happen again.
> 
> kudos and comments?


	20. -..-.-.-.-....-.-.-.-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan and Sam tag team  
> Logan and Remy tag team  
> Q's plan kinda backfires  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in defense of Roman, Q has not been named by Virgil in the phone call, they have no reason to assume that Remus would be involved other than the fact that he has a past history with tormenting people (which was considered ‘cured’) and they kinda had sound logic when they tied up Roman that first time.   
> Q’s able to change his voice from a tenor to a baritone, so he stays in the tenor voice so that people think he’s this innocent chill guy and then he uses the deeper voice for the phone calls because he’s *extra* like that. It’s gonna be a lot harder keeping Virgil a secret though...

Logan sat at the table in the coffee shop that him and Sam had started to frequent, mostly because it had a policy where they wouldn’t kick you out as long as you had a drink.

Sam was scrolling through the news reports on a tablet as he looked at the map and all the x’s that littered the streets that they had covered. It was depressingly little and at one and a half weeks with Virgil missing and just hitting the seven day marker with nothing from Roman, the police were getting scarily close to calling the case cold and giving up.

“No reports of murders and no bodies found that could be id’d as Ro or Virgil.” Sam put down the tablet and took a sip of her cold espresso before looking up. “But no news is good news, right?”

“Not really. We need at least a lead to move forward.”

“Do you think Roman remembered his birthday? He’s twenty three now, and probably dead.” 

“That’s pessimistic, even for you Sam.” Logan muttered as he folded the map over and scribbled a note to himself on the front.

“I’m looking more into the realistic side of things, I don’t think I can last another day without something from phone voice.”

“It is odd that the last correspondence that we had was the day before Roman decided to play hero.”

Sam sat straight up, her eyes widening. “Logan, what if we reached out first?”

“Like, called the number that they last called us with?” He tilted his head and nodded. “It’s worth a shot.”

There was a person approaching them and Logan recognized him as the guy who’d almost spilled coffee on him the first time they’d visited.

“Hi..” He placed his hands on the table and smiled awkwardly which annoyed Logan, mostly because this stranger was wrinkling the map.

“Salutations.”

“Logan, act normal for once. Hi, I’m Sam!” Sam held out her hand for the stranger to shake and when he did, she smiled brightly, faking it.

“I just noticed that you guys are showing up here a lot. Are you here for a college break?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

“I noticed you have a map, any locations that you want to see? I could probably give you a few local tips if you wanted.”

Logan looked at Sam, who shook her head slightly.

“I think that we’re good.”

“Well, if you guys need anything, I’m here for lunch everyday.” The stranger smiled one last time before leaving them alone and Logan folded the map up.

“He’s so weird.” Sam noted as they watched the stranger go back to his table and sit down.

“Yeah, there’s something about him… what’s the slang term? A bad ‘vibe’ if you would.”

Sam barked out a laugh. “Virgil would be proud of your use of slang.”

Logan stiffened at the mention of Virgil before sighing sadly. “I suppose he would.”

…

Roman was feeling restless. Sure, he’d been given a few letters that Q had carted across town, all of them warning him to stay where it was safe for as long as he needed to.

So when Q came back with a bunch of sound dampening foam for walls and asked for some help with a project, Roman jumped at the opportunity. 

He was led to one of the weird rooms as Remus had dubbed it, and given wallpaper glue and the foam.

“So I know it’s kinda odd that there aren’t any windows and ignore that massive eye screw sticking out of the wall. If you could just foam the walls and maybe the ceiling, we could move out my soundbooth stuff so I can work on a few projects.”

“Thanks, I could probably have this done by nine or so tonight, it’s not like I have anything else to do.” Roman took the glue and foam, shutting the door so that he could work in privacy.

…

One room over, Virgil was leaning against the wall and listening to Roman sing. He’d untied himself again, but from lack of food and sleep, he hadn’t put up a fight the few times that Q and Remus had visited, so they were allowing him to have some freedom.

If you could call being handcuffed and dumped on the floor freedom.

He was kinda confused as to how Roman was acting so chill about the whole of being kidnapped -abducted?- and especially since it was his brother.

Virgil closed his eyes and pressed his palms into his forehead, trying to quell the mounting headache that was rising up.

He missed Logan. 

If Logan was here, he’d have seen through the facade and done something. Or at the very least, they’d be talking using Morse code through the thin walls of this shitty apartment.

He could only hope that they hadn’t given up on him yet.

…

Q was riding an emotional high. Roman was unwittingly building a soundproof room to keep V in and Remus had surprisingly refrained from murdering his brother in the week that Roman had been staying over.

And then his plan backfired when his phone started ringing.

…

Logan was sitting cross legged on the ground, Remy lounging on the couch next to him as they watched the phone ring.

“Think he’ll answer?”

Logan shrugged at Remy’s question. It was close to ten pm, so by his logic, you could pick up your damn phone.

On the sixth ring the line connected.

“Hello Logan.”

“I’m here too bitch.” Remy spat and Logan put up a hand in a silent warning.

“Ah yes, the other boyfriend. Well, I can assure you that Roman is in great hands. He’s perfectly happy to be here.”

“I want to talk to him.” Remy growled.

“Which one?”

Logan and Remy looked at each other and after a minute of silent debate, Logan nodded for Remy.

“Roman.”

“Wrong choice, he’s not feeling up to it.”

“Why did you give us an option if we aren’t allowed to speak to the person we chose?” Logan asked and Remy placed a placating hand on his shoulder.

“Babes, he’s just being a prick.”

There was the sound of walking, indistinct chatter and then a door opening and shutting.

“Alright, here. No funny stuff like last time.”

“Hey Lo.” Virgil’s voice came over and Logan reached back to grab Remy’s hand like a lifeline.

“Are you okay? Where are you? Have you seen Roman?”

“Woah, slow down Left Brain. I’m alive okay?” Virgil snapped and Logan flinched.

“Sorry, I’m just tired. I don’t know where I am and I haven’t seen Roman. I’m sorry. Sorry.”

“Please don’t apologize Virgil, we’ll get you out of there, I promise.”

“Logan,  _ I _ don’t even know where I am right now. There’s a chance that I…” Virgil trailed off and Logan strained to listen as instead of speaking, Virgil resorted to tapping out a short message in Morse.

“What’d you tell him?” The phone voice was back.

“Something private.” Virgil muttered and the phone voice seemed to buy it as non threatening.

“Say bye, cause if you try to contact this number again, the next time you’ll see V will be dead in a river.”

“Farewell Virgil.” Logan whispered.

“We’ll get you outta there girl.” Remy quipped in as the phone voice hung up. They sat in silence for a solid minute and then Remy let go of Logan’s hand.

“So what did your nerdy boyfriend tell you in tap?”

“It’s called Morse code and he gave me a hint as to who our phone voice might be.”

“So he’s not as weak as he sounded like?”

“No, Virgil’s hurting, but he’s resourceful. How many Turnbecks do you think are in the city?”

“I dunno babes, a couple thousand?”

“Great. Let’s get ‘crackin’ then.” Logan said in all seriousness and Remy held back a facepalm at the slang.

“Let’s get cracking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahahahaha, Virgil couldn't give Logan much, but he gave him a start.
> 
> kudos?  
> comments?  
> i'll give a shoutout in the next chapter to whoever translates the title and gets it right. It's one word.


	21. I'm not okay and it's kinda obvious (or the skeleton in the soundproof room)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman finds out.  
> Patton and Jess make a discovery.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: THIS CHAPTER HAS GRAPHIC DESCRIPTIONS OF INJURY. reader discretion advised. additional warnings include: Q, Remus, swearing, themes of starvation, knocking someone out, chains, non sexual bondage (still feels weird writing that), self sacrifice.
> 
> shoutout to thepineapplehedgehog and morefdupthanriverdaleswriting for putting in the time to translate morse code :D

Roman hadn’t been allowed back into the room that he had soundproofed. The door was always locked and he’d seen Remus go in once a day like clockwork and Q spent an abnormal amount of time in there, but who was he to judge?

But, for the first time in the two months that Roman had been camping out in Q and Re’s apartment that both had left, leaving him alone to fully explore the place.

There was the room that Q shared with his brother, and then a smaller room across from it that had bloodstains on the tile, which was nasty. He could see why this room wasn’t being used with the old blood, it gave the room a pretty haunted vibe. And then there was a dingy bathroom with a small stand up shower.

Finally there was the office that Roman was living in and then the locked room.

Roman liked standing outside the locked door, pretending that there was someone on the other side. A damsel in distress, or maybe a jinn that would grant wishes. 

But since Q and Remus weren’t here, he was gonna find the key and open it, because he was  _ dying _ to find out what was on the other side.

Finding a key was surprisingly easy. It was a really cheap looking thing and it had a V.S. written on it in sharpie. Roman slotted the key into the lock and twisted it, surprised at how loud the clicking noise of the tumblers turning was.

The door swung inward and Roman flicked on the light, surveying the foam walls, the person chained to the wall…

Wait.

_ What?!? _

The person curled in on themself and Roman practically ran to their side, kneeling down.

“Who are you?” Roman gently placed a hand on their shoulder, which was swamped by a hoodie and they flinched, shuddering at his touch.

Gosh, they were basically bones. Roman turned them so that he could examine their face and the chain clinked quietly from where it was attached at the left wrist, rubbing the skin raw. But he recognized the scarring pattern on their hand...

“Virgil, holy shit, I’m so sorry.” Roman sputtered as he took in Virgil’s injuries, lifting his friend’s head into his lap.

There was a shallow cut across one cheekbone and so much bruising that he could barely see any skin that wasn’t mottled. When he dared to pull up the ratted sleeve of the sweatshirt, he was disgusted to find clean slits snaking up his friend’s arm, interlaced with fresh circular burn marks. Roman carefully ran a hand across Virgil’s forehead and his eyes fluttered open, dull and glassy.

“princey?”

“Hey emo, you look like you’ve been through the wringer.”

Virgil coughed out a laugh and he closed his eyes again. “You can’t let them know that you found me. Run.”

“I’m not leaving without you.”

“reckless. Remus comes in here you know? Talks about creative ways to kill you after they’re done with me. Calls you gullible.” Virgil’s breathing was slow and shallow, and his voice barely above a whisper.

Roman moved a few strands of dirty hair away from Virgil’s face and sighed. “I know I’m reckless and gullible. But I’m loyal. Could you pick the lock on your wrist? Then I can carry you out and get you to the hospital.”

“I can’t pick it Ro.” 

Roman felt like his heart shattered when Virgil said that he couldn’t. A few tears slipped from Virgil’s sealed eyes and every few seconds an involuntary shudder ran through him. 

“Ro? Can you take my head out of your lap? It’s putting strain on my neck. Sorry..”

Roman carefully maneuvered Virgil’s head down and sighed. “I’m not going to leave you.”

“You keep saying that. But how long have you been here?”

“Two months.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah, maybe I should’ve noticed when they wouldn’t let me check the news that something was up, but I  _ wanted  _ to believe that Remus had changed.” Roman laughed bitterly and motioned to the walls around them, even though he knew that Virgil wasn’t looking. “I helped make this, I’m so sorry V…”

“Don’t call me that.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Go, lock the door and run please. Don’t make me beg Roman. And when you find the others, tell Janus that he knows where it is and who to give it to.” 

“Virgil…” Roman protested weakly.

“ **_GO._ ** ” The sound ripped out of Virgil and Roman nodded to nothing, scrambling back up to his feet and exiting the room. He locked the door, feeling like he was betraying Logan and then put the key back.

He was about to open the front door and leave when it swung open and Q marched in, closely followed by Remus, who was grinning.

“Remus, grab him.”

Roman held up his hands non threateningly. “Woah, what’s going on Quinn?”

“I wired a silent alarm to the holding cell you dumbass. Did you honestly think that I would be stupid enough to leave you alone here without precautions?” Q snarled as Remus grabbed Roman’s arms and twisted them painfully behind his back.

“I was gonna kill Virgil this week anyway, I’ve gotten kinda bored of the media hyping this up and  _ somehow _ Logan figured out my last name, but you weren’t going to know any of that. Now you can watch V die and know that it was your dumbass trusting heart that killed him.” Quinn stalked forward and cupped a hand around Roman’s chin.

“See you tonight.”

And then Q was pushing on a pressure point in Roman’s neck and his vision tunneled as he blacked out.

…

Patton refused to quit. 

It had been two months since Roman had left, too long since the Turnbeck as Logan had dubbed him had said anything and the police had given up last week, declaring the case unsolvable. Patton was grateful for his parents in Maine and their deep pockets, because there was no way that he would’ve been able to afford this AirBNB for so long.

It had been weird, having to email all their professors and tell them that they weren’t coming back due to circumstances, and somehow the information had been leaked to the media- Patton had a running bet that it was either Dr. Picani or Sam’s Statistical engineering professor- and then a bunch of true crime people had gotten involved, so if anyone was gonna figure this out, it would be them.

Currently, Sam was on the couch, stalking Facebook for New York Turnbecks, Jess was doing the same thing in the loveseat but with Instagram and Twitter, Logan and Remy were tracting in Central Park and the surrounding area and Janus was with a detective, who had somehow scoured up a bunch of photos of people that looked sorta like Virgil or Roman. 

Patton pulled a glass out of a cabinet and filled it with water from the sink, getting some ice cubes from the freezer to get rid of the taste of city water.

“Hey, I think I found something.” Jess called from her seat in the living room.

Patton wandered to the living room and looked over her shoulder. “Who is it?”

“Some guy in NYC, his Twitter handle is Q_Turnbeck478 and his status reads ‘It’s complicated.’ Should I message him? He looks to be about our age and his profile has a bunch of really weird facts on it.”

Sam looked up from her tablet. “What kind of facts?”

Patton nodded. “If it’s something like how he owns three cats and likes eating carrots dipped in dark chocolate, then I don’t think it’d be the Turnbeck that we’re looking for.”

Jess clicked on the profile. “Um, says that he volunteers in a psych asylum, is currently going to film school and… oh shit.”

“Language.”

“ Est-ce que le français travaille pour toi, salaud?” Jess shot back and Patton looked down, flabbergasted.

“ Vous parlez français aussi, ou est-ce que Virgile vous a appris cette phrase juste pour me contrarier?” Patton shot back and Jess twisted to look at him with confusion.

“Anyway, says that he’s been best friends with Stormcloud and then there’s a link to Virgil’s channel.”

“No way. We gotta tell everyone about this. Don’t message them yet, I want everyone here. I’ll text Janus and Sam, you call Logan and Remy.” Patton said excitedly as he pulled out his phone and unlocked it.

“Janus! I think we found Turnbeck, get over here with the detective guy!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Est-ce que le français travaille pour toi, salaud?- Does French work for you, bastard?
> 
> Vous parlez français aussi, ou est-ce que Virgile vous a appris cette phrase juste pour me contrarier?- Do you speak French too, or did Virgil teach you this sentence just to annoy me?
> 
> Patton pulling out the big guns cause Janus taught him some French. 
> 
> Virgil was so unrecognizable that Roman thought that Q just had a random person locked up. And then he figures it out and he's like, aw shit.  
> but yeah, he's gonna be haunted by his actions forever.
> 
> presses 'post' and then goes grocery shopping.


	22. Drinks on me.  (drink for me)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q and Remus celebrate by watching some true crime and drinking some alcohol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love true crime and i love alcohol.  
> kidding, i don't drink.  
> also I hate how true crime always is like "in the biggest case of the century." like bish, you said that last episode. Anyway, I'm like four chapters ahead of ya'll and I just wanna warn you...  
> it's not too late to turn back.

“I’m Morgan LeRoe with  _ Case Gone Cold _ and here tonight, we have a special episode of one of New York’s most puzzling cases this decade.”

The peppy blonde host of the show looked right into the camera before continuing.

“For the past five years, the Stormcloud channel has been considered a ghost channel on YouTube after it’s owner put out one video and then seemingly dropped out of existence, which led to many rumors of the creator’s death. Then, just last year, the channel came back in full force and the creator was identified as a Floridan collage student, Virgil Storm.”

The show cut to a video clip of Virgil playing the ukulele before switching back to Morgan.

“After an attempted murder of one of his friends, which resulted in a an accident where Stormcloud was seriously injured-- the perpetrator  _ was _ caught and we were all lead to believe that it was all over. However, no less than two months ago, Virgil Storm, along with his friend Roman Prince, vanished with nothing but an ominous phone call and a few texts from an untraceable number to even suggest that they’re still alive.”

…

“Remus, why are you watching that shit?” Q called as he heard the TV turn on and off, on and off.

“I just like to listen to what we’ve done! I mean, look Harlot Quinn, you’ve stumped a true crime show! What a lovely way to end their season with the finding of two bodies!”

“V’s still holding out, I thought that he’d succumb by now. You know that I don’t like leaving my projects half finished before moving on to the next one.” Quinn joined Remus on the couch and shook his head. “Choose to keep it on or off Remus.”

“Hmmmm, both.” Remus said as he clicked the TV back on, and off just as fast.

“No, one or the other.”

“Fine, on, but only because I like the gore.”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“And you’re uncreative! The room was my idea yanno!”

Q nodded. “It was probably the only idea I went with. Ice cream?”

“Nah, I just wanna scoop out Roman’s heart and eat that. Could I do that once Virgil’s gone, I don’t think that he’d like to see his friend like that.”

“It’s your revenge Remus. Knock yourself out. I’m getting up to get ice cream and alcohol, so it’s your last chance to say yes or no.”

“Fine, but only the alcohol! It’s been far too long since I’ve been wasted!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> virgil and roman just be vibin' and not in a good way.
> 
> kudos? comments? I'll post another chapter tomorrow morning.


	23. Point of Impact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One lives  
> the other dies  
> isn't it funny how cruel fate can be?
> 
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry

Virgil wasn’t that surprised when Roman got brought in and then zip tied to a chair. He _was_ surprised when Remus brought in a second chair and placed it so it was back to back with Roman’s. Q unlocked him and dragged him over, dumping him in the chair before zip tying his arms to it as well.

Cool. Virgil had assumed that he was going to die without dignity on the ground. At least now he can die in a chair, sitting up like a normal person.

It’s quiet in the soundproof room, with Virgil waiting for Roman to wake up. He can hear his friend’s breathing, it’s loose and free, unrestricted by pain. Virgil shook his head, getting rid of the whispers of jealousy in his mind.

It’s not either of their fault that they’re like this.

Roman moved a bit, and then his head jolted up.

“Virgil?”

“Hey.”

“Are we gonna die? This is all my fault.”

“Heh, I think it’s mine for not keeping up with my new year’s resolution.”

“What was it again?”

“Not die.” Virgil muttered and Roman laughed sadly.

“Why the zip ties though? Wouldn’t rope be better?”  
“I kept getting out with the rope.”

“Ah.”

“You can break out of zip ties.”

“Really?”

Virgil hummed a yes.

“How?”

“Tighten your zip ties and then just pull up like a bad bitch in an action movie.” 

A moment later, there’s a snapping sound and the sound of Roman breaking more zip ties.

“I’m coming around to help you.” Roman warned and Virgil nodded. 

When Roman finally broke his last zip tie, Virgil slumped forward- almost falling into his friend.

“Can you walk?”

“I can barely breathe Roman.”

“I’ll get you out of here. Are you okay with riding on my back or do I need to bridal it?”

“I can ride piggyback Princey. Just be careful.” 

Roman knelt in front of Virgil’s chair and he gently maneuvered his friend’s arms so that they rested around his neck. He waited until Virgil gave a weak nod before standing, making sure that he had a grip underneath Virgil’s knees.

“Ow.” Virgil said into his ear as Roman swiveled and took a cautious step forward.

“Sorry.”

“Not your fault they cut my Achilles Tendons.” Virgil said offhandedly and Roman stopped.

“What the hell?” He yelled it before freezing. Virgil weakly clapped a hand over his mouth and the sound of footsteps from outside the door.

“Roman, drop me and go get the pocketknife from behind the foam next to where I was chained.” Virgil hissed as Q’s voice grew louder and the sound of a key clicked in the lock.

“How do you have a pocketknife?”

“Hurry!” Virgil released his grip on Roman and the sense of urgency was enough for him to put away his questions.

Roman, to his eternal regret, dropped Virgil, who fell to the floor in a crumpled heap, not moving as the door opened and Roman ripped foam off the wall to see a wicked knife clatter to the ground. He grabbed it and turned in one fluid motion.

Q looked drunk, which surprised Roman, because when he’d been staying with them normally, there wasn’t any alcohol in sight.

“Prince got out.” He slurred and Roman jumped at him, driving the knife into Q’s shoulder, feeling no remorse as Q shrieked and clawed at him, fists pummeling his ribs.

Roman twisted the knife. “You touched my best friend, I _cut_ you.”

Q stopped with his attack and stared up at Roman fearfully. “I…”

“Shut your fucking mouth and don’t try to follow. Where’s my brother?”  
“Passed out on the couch, I almost was too and then I heard the yell.” 

Roman pulled out the knife and dropped Q, quickly wiping the blade on his pants before closing it and going over to Virgil.

“Hey Virge, stay with me okay?”

Virgil didn’t respond verbally, but he gave a slight nod as Roman picked him up bridal style and carried him out of the room, stepping over Q on his way out.

Remus was, in fact, completely wasted on the couch and Roman managed to steal the door keys from him and leave, locking his brother and Q in the apartment.

“Just a bit longer Virgil…” He muttered as he went down the stairs as fast as he deemed safe, which was slow, but he didn’t have the time to wait for an elevator, not when he could feel his friend’s pulse fading.

That final drop must’ve been the kicker. Roman burst outside the stairwell, picking his pace up into a run, looking for anyone who could help. 

His feet stumbled as he wandered into the empty street, but to his credit, he didn’t fall. 

There were headlights suddenly, a car screeching to a stop and then the tell tale red and blue flashing as the cops flicked their lights on.

“Thank god!”

…

Henry hated New York in May. Well, he always hated New York, because he hated being a police officer and if he had another way to make money that wasn’t minimum wage, he would’ve dropped the job a long time ago.

“Hey, can you turn the music up a bit Ollie?”

“Hmmm, sure.” Ollie turned the dial and looked up. “Holy shit, stop the car!”

Henry slammed on his breaks and flicked on his lights as Ollie grabbed the radio, turning it to contact the station.

“Hello, this is Officers Rodreguiez and Hammon, and we have found what looks like a young man carrying a homeless corpse.”

Crackling. “A corpse?”

“Yes.”

“Ask him if he knows the id on the body and make sure he’s not on the list. You might have found a criminal, so be careful.”

“Copy. Over and out.” Ollie put the radio down and opened his door as Henry did the same.

“Who are you?!”

The young man’s eyes widened in relief. “I’m Roman Prince and this is my friend Virgil and he needs an ambulance!”

“That’s a dead body sir.” Henry said and then he cursed as the corpse in Roman’s arms lifted it’s head, mouth forming words that he couldn’t hear.

Henry and Ollie looked at each other in shock.

“Not a dead body.” Henry muttered.

“I’ll call an ambulance through dispatch, you go make sure he doesn’t die as they’re coming.” Ollie ducked back into the car and grabbed the radio again.

“We’re going to need medical personnel, and within the next ten minutes, we’ve located Roman Prince and Virgil Storm.”

“Copy that, you’ll have a team heading your way in the next minute.”

…

Virgil could feel the lights flashing, his heart slowing, lungs giving up on him as he raised his head to tell Roman that he was dying.

“ _Ro--_ ”

He was being set down, he could feel the pavement beneath him, someone else was shouting…

And he was falling...

Down.

Virgil took one last shuddering breath, feeling the death rattle in his lungs and then the siren’s lights faded out, the feeling beneath him disappeared and the sound of Roman’s frantic voice left-- leaving him feeling like he was drowning in darkness. 

His last thought before falling into oblivion?

_I’m so sorry Logan._


	24. are you crying? I'm crying too.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> . . .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry.

**_Medical Analysis: Report E3408, EMT Tara Herst. Taken after V.S. and R.P. were admitted into hospital_ **

_ Patient Roman Prince sustained multiple broken ribs and was pulled away from Patient Virgil Storm, who upon arrival had a pulse of 30 BPM. _

_ Storm’s heart stopped less than a minute after arrival and he was resuscitated after three minutes of chest compressions and one shock from the defibrillator. Storm has sustained injuries not limited to, dehydration, kidney failure, lung and heart failure, severed Achilles tendons on both feet, multiple bruises across his abdomen and ribs that can only lead to internal bruising as well. Fractures include: ribs three and four, a hairline fracture on his left wrist from being dropped(?) and an additional fracture in his ankle. Storm also has burns across his arms and legs, cuts in the same locations and there is a bruising pattern across his neck that suggests bites and/or strangulation from multiple people. He also has no response to light or sound and will flinch when touched. As to other underlying injuries he may have sustained in the two months of him being held captive, testing and scans will need to be done once Storm is in a stable condition in order to create a treatment plan. _

_ Storm is in critical condition and as of right now, his chances of surviving the night are low to none. _

_ Prince will, with time, recover.  _

_ I am unsure of the psychological injuries that the pair may have sustained. _

...

**_Unofficial Police Report for the arrests of Quinn Turnbeck and Remus Prince._ **

_ Upon arriving at the apartment of Quinn Turnbeck and Remus Prince, Officers Rodriguez and I were surprised to find Turnbeck in a self described ‘holding cell’ with a stabbing wound. Turnbeck admitted immediately to all charges, and proudly confirmed that Roman Prince had in fact stabbed him so that he and Virgil Storm could escape. _

_ Remus Prince put up a struggle, but was tazed so that he wouldn’t gouge out Rodriguez’s eye with the spoon that he was holding. Unfortunately, Rodriguez was also tazed in my haste to help him.  _

_ Both are in custody and Quinn Turnbeck is getting stitches for the wound in his shoulder. _

…

_ May 20th, 11:56pm EST _

Sokka_withA_Latte: they found him. He’s alive and he’s gonna be okay.

It’s_Picani!: And Virgil?

Sokka_withA_Latte: the doctors said that he might not make it to the morning.

It’s_Picani!: good luck and keep me updated.

It’s_Picani!: Now get the lickey spilckey back to Roman.


	25. Death letters, as an apology to you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And if your heart stops beating  
> I'll be here wondering  
> Did you get what you deserve?  
> The ending of your life.  
> -MCR
> 
> Or, Logan tries to not cry and he does anyways because that's the pain.
> 
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: death talk, crying, mentions of psychological abuse, mentions of sexual abuse, hopelessness, death watch, hurt logan, hurt virgil, hurt roman, not being able to see the person you love, general pain and crying, i cried writing this, my sister cried betaing this, if you cry i won't blame you.
> 
> I'm sorry.

Logan hadn’t been allowed in. Which made logical sense, Virgil was in the ICU and on a watch all night, so having another person there, especially one that had no medical knowledge would be stupid. But that wasn’t the only room that he hadn’t been into.

No, what he was mad about was that Roman was only allowing two people in his room at once and currently Remy and for some reason Janus were in there. Janus came out and nodded at Logan, Sam and Jess before excusing himself, saying that he had to grab something from the AirBNB.

Remy came out of the room and motioned tiredly for Logan. “Come on babes.”

Logan stood shakily and followed him in, sitting in the chair next to Roman’s bed. Remy gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder before walking out again to give them some privacy.

“Hey Logan.”

Logan held back tears and straightened his spine. “Roman.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Why? You were stuck too.”

“I should have caught on sooner, maybe Virgil wouldn’t be dying alone if I had been less of a dunce and more suspicious of Remus--”

“Roman, you  _ saved _ him.” Logan whispered and he started to cry in front of Roman, god how embarrassing, but he couldn’t hold it back anymore.

If Roman felt out of place by it, he didn’t say anything. He let Logan cry and Logan was grateful that he could let out the stress from the past two months without having to worry about being judged.

When he had finished, Roman smiled at him.

“Feeling better?”

“Not really. I have a migraine on top of my mounting worries for Virgil. I should get some sleep and then find a doctor and ask for an update.” Logan stood and stretched, giving Roman a smile.

“It’s good to have you back Roman.”

“It’s good to see you again Logan.”

Logan left Roman so that he could get Remy back and he wandered the halls aimlessly. It was early, around two thirty in the morning and when he had gone back out to the waiting area, Patton and Sam were both asleep, with Jess almost as well, but Logan felt too wired with the possibility that Virgil might never wake up.

He’d been found.

But at what cost? Logan didn’t want to think about the answer to that as he turned down an empty corridor, leaning against the wall before sitting.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been camped out there when Janus found him, cane clicking against the hospital floor.

“Can I join?”

“Sure, I don’t care.”

“I have something for you, want it?” Janus sat down next to him on the ground, and he held out a thick white envelope.

“What is that?”

“Uh, well, back when Virgil first got hurt, he got really para-- anxious that maybe he’d die one day without saying what he wanted to say to everyone. And so I told him that maybe he should write out what he’d say. He updates them way too often in my opinion, but here we are.” Janus held out the envelope again. “This one’s yours. I have a few more I need to deliver.”

“Why now?” Logan asked as he took the envelope and turned it over in his hands, noting Virgil’s familiar handwriting on the front.

“Roman told me that Virgil asked me to. I’m the only one who knows where he hides them. It’s funny I guess, I had no idea he brought them to New York. I don’t know, I’ll give you some privacy.” Janus stood and left Logan alone to read the letter.

Logan ripped open the letter messily, he was never one that was great at opening envelopes, there was a reason  _ why _ he owned a bunch of letter openers.

The envelope held a singular printed piece of paper, the rest of the thickness coming from notebook paper scraps, photos and even a single fortune cookie fortune. Logan pulled out the fortune and unfolded it carefully.

_ A beautiful, smart person will change your world. _

Logan smiled and turned the paper over to look on the date that Virgil had written on the back. The date was from a few weeks before they had met, and next to it a small heart had been drawn in.

Logan held back a choked sob and he pulled out the neatly written letter on the printer paper.

_ Hey Logan. _

_ If you’re getting this, you’ve either found my secret stash of ‘death letters’ years after I’ve written this or Janus gave it to you because I failed my New Year’s resolution to the most epic of proportions. Which means that you’re keeping a strong face on for everybody, don’t glare at me like that, I know how you get. _

_ I’m sorry that I didn’t get to tell you everything before this happened. I’m sorry that I don’t get to see you finally finish your damn stats degree.  _

_ There’s a lot of things about New York that I’d wanted to see with you. When I lived here, there was this one guy, Giovanni, he made the best sandwiches in the city and he always said that I could have a free sandwich when I came around. I was going to exploit that loophole with you.  _

_ I write these letters at the beginning of each week. So, currently, it’s a Sunday in March and you just pestered me into packing more than sweatshirts and hoodies for the trip. I put up a fight, mostly because I think that you’re cute when your nose scrunches up as your glasses slide down when you get passionate about something. _

_ Maybe I’ll make it the whole two weeks and I can hide this letter and all the stuff inside, put it away and write the next one. Or maybe I won’t and the plane will crash and me writing this will be useless anyway. _

_ Alright, that was more depressing than my usual stuff. Normally I’m pretty upbeat in my letters, but I’ve been getting some pretty stupid texts that I’m not gonna tell you about, but trust me, they’re creepy. You know what? Screw it, I’ll tell you about the texts on Wednesday, after our last class. _

_ Here’s my official goodbye, it changes every time I write this letter, but I’m sure you get the drift. _

_ I love you. _

_ I love how you dropped everything for me that one time I had a flashback in class and you came and got me out of there and you didn’t ask why. I love how you called me every Saturday night when you were in Oregon, even if it was just for thirty seconds. I loved it when you took us to the beach and we stargazed and we were free from the pain for two amazing days, even if we did have to share a mattress in the back of a U-Haul. _

_ Logan, there’s so many wonderful things about you and I want you to promise me this: You will move on. _

_ I don’t care if we’re both twenty two, well you’re twenty three like how Roman will be in a few days. I want you to be happy Lo, and it means that you’re gonna have to move on. _

_ Please don’t hold onto the broken pieces. You can be stubborn, but I want you to take that stubbornness and use it to heal. _

_ I want you to rise from those who broke us.  _

_ I love you Logan. _

_ Left Brain. _

_ My cold rational icicle.  _

_ I called you a squid once, remember? I was kinda grasping at straws when you asked how you were like one. You can have all my pens from the frosh fair, heaven knows that you need them. _

_ Gosh, what a stupid thing to write about. Pens and nicknames and hypotheticals where I’m dead. My luck can’t be that bad, it’s just Spring break in New York with my friends. A break with you. _

_ I can hear Janus and Roman arguing about luggage. That’s my cue to go. I hope you like the photos and notebook snippets.  _

_ Love you, _

_ Virgil :) _

Logan lightly traced his fingers over the writing, letting himself cry, tears falling onto the paper and smearing the ink a tiny bit. This letter made the crushing weight in his chest unbearable, it made everything too real, too painful.

He folded the letter up and put it back in the envelope, opting to explore the other contents to keep his mind off of everything.

There were quite a few photos that he didn’t remember them taking, like one from their beach trip where Logan was looking back at the camera with a smile on his face, eyes sparkling.

Another one was Virgil lying in bed, Logan’s head resting on his chest as he slept. Logan turned the photo over to see that Virgil had put a sticky note on the back.

_ Fell asleep studying. You work yourself too hard. _

So many labeled memories, snapshots of perfect moments and not so great ones, who knew that Virgil had taken so many photos of the times that they spent together. Logan had often pestered him about constantly being on his phone, but if he hadn’t, then most of these wouldn’t have existed.

The sound of footsteps jolted him out of this stream of consciousness and Logan looked up to see an ER doctor approaching him. He quickly stuffed everything into the envelope and stood.

“Hello.”

She gave him an exhausted smile. “Are you Logan? One of your friends sent me to talk with you.”

“I see. Is it about Virgil?”

“Yes, he has you listed as his emergency contact and so I can discuss with you the full extent of his injuries, we just had some results for a few tests come in. If you want to wait for morning to have this conversation, we can do that too.”

“I would like to talk now.”

“I thought that you’d say that, follow me, we can talk in my associate’s office for privacy.” She led Logan to an office and sat down at the desk, letting him take the chair on the other side.

“Do you have any questions before we start?”

“When can I see him?”

“When he’s in a stable enough condition for our staff to not have to worry about his heart shutting down. I’m not going to sugarcoat anything for you Logan, there’s a reason why I work in ER and not children’s pediatrics. Don’t be afraid to ask me to explain stuff, but I am going to be completely honest with you.”

“I wouldn’t want you to lie, please continue.”

She opened a folder that she’d been carrying around and pulled out a few photos. “These are results of a brain scan that we took, and if you look here, there’s partial swelling to Virgil’s brain, mostly in areas that affect memory.”

“Is he going to have gaps in his memory?”

“Possibly, but he will more likely have chronic migraines and occasional short term memory loss as he recovers. And Logan, if he does wake up, he won’t be the Virgil that you remember. Considering what Roman’s described to us, Quinn inflicted a lot of psychological abuse on Virgil in addition to the physical.”

“Are you implying PTSD?”

She looked at him and sighed. “Logan. How much do you care about Virgil?”

The answer was simple and yet he struggled to say it. “He’s everything to me.”

“How far would you go to help him?”

Logan shook his head. “As horribly cliche this is going to sound, I would do anything to make sure he was okay.”

“And if that meant that he didn’t want to see you, would you be okay with that?”

There was a beat of silence and Logan slowly nodded. “If Virgil thinks that it is better for us not to interact, then yes, I would leave him alone.”

“I’m only asking this because about five years ago we had an eerily similar thing happen. Girl was taken from her boyfriend’s house in the middle of the night and they took a week to find her. Once she was recovering, she didn’t want to interact with anyone from her life. She wanted a clean slate. And with how badly Virgil’s been abused and looking at his past history, there’s a high chance that he won’t want to see you, or anyone else.”

Logan felt his throat close up but he nodded.

“Which brings us to our next problem. We’re very lucky that the EMT on duty at the time was Ms. Herst, because she was able to ID a multitude of the problems without having to go through more tests and she came upon something disturbing to say the least.” She trailed off and Logan waited patiently for her to regain her composure.

“Virgil may be a victim of sexual abuse.”

Logan suddenly felt very small and he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and then his head in his hands. “Ah.”

“Do you want to continue this conversation, or would you like to be alone for a moment? It’s a lot of information to process.”

“Can you give me a few minutes? And can you leave the folder behind?” 

She stood from her chair and left him alone, the door of the office clicking shut behind him.

Logan looked up and wiped away a few tears before steeling himself and pulling the folder towards him.

He had a lot of research to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man, this story just keeps getting angstyer and angstyer


	26. proposals, coffee and conversations with yourself.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janus asks a question  
> Sam and Logan chat  
> Virgil has a chat too, but not with who you're expecting.  
> Chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slowly marching out of the angst  
> slowly  
> it's still pretty angsty.

Janus abruptly woke up to Patton shaking him.

“Janus!”

“What?” Janus grumbled, the events of the night finally catching up to him as he groggily rubbed at his eyes.

“Virgil made it.” Patton’s excitement was contagious and Janus smiled before frowning nervously.

“That doesn’t mean full recovery Patton.”

“I know, but I talked to a nurse and he said that most people just have to survive the first night and Virgil did, so we don’t have to worry as badly about him dying.”

“That is slightly comforting.” Janus admitted. “How’s Roman?”

“Oh, he swears every time he moves his ribs, but he told me that he’s fine.” Patton rested his head on Janus’s shoulder and yawned. “These chairs are horrible for sleep.”

Janus nodded and moved one of his hands to rest on top of Patton’s head. “We’ll head home in a few hours, okay sweetie?”

“Home’s in Florida.” Patton hummed sadly and Janus frowned. 

“Patton? Can I talk to you?”

“We’re talking right now silly.”

“No, come on, let’s go for a quick walk.” Janus stood and held out his free hand for Patton to take as they walked to the elevators and rode to the main floor. The hospital had a tiny garden out back and there were a few other patients walking around with nurses or family members. Janus led Patton to a bench and they sat down.

“So what did you want to talk to me about?”

Janus nervously pulled a box out of his jacket pocket. “I wanted to give this to you two months ago, but then everything happened and I promised myself that I wouldn’t until everyone was safe and now we have Virgil and Roman back and I couldn’t wait any longer.” He opened the ring box and handed it to Patton. 

“Marry me?” he whispered.

Patton looked at the ring and then back at Janus, disbelief flashing across his face. “You want to marry me?”

“Of course I do. The only options at this point are either marriage or breakup and I really don’t wanna break up with you.”

“Oh.” Patton looked at the ring in the box and gently pulled it out, turning it over in his hands with awe. “It’s beautiful Janus, but I can’t accept this.”

“Why?”

“It’s not fair to everyone else.”

Janus grasped Patton’s hands, folding them so that he was still holding the ring. “One of us will always have something crazy going on, and you’ve been running yourself into the ground trying to be happy for us. I want you to be happy for  _ you.  _ But I understand if you want to say no, and I won’t push.” He promised as he let go of their hands.

Patton nodded and opened his hand, still looking at the ring. “How long have you had this?”

Janus shrugged. “A while. It may or may not have been my New Year's resolution to propose to you.”

Patton smiled. “Well then, as long as we’re engaged by the end of the year. You hold onto this,” he put the ring back into the box and handed it back, “keep it safe until we’re ready. Just because I said no now doesn’t mean that I won’t say yes later. But we need to be there for Virgil and Roman.”

Janus put the ring back into his jacket pocket and held out his arms for a hug that Patton folded himself into.

“You’re not mad?”

“I couldn’t be mad at you for caring for someone Patton.”

…

They let him in after seventy two hours and one surgery later. Logan sat in a chair next to the comatose patient, quietly holding one of Virgil’s hands as the heart monitor beeped in the background.

He looked like he’d been dragged back from the brink of death. Which in a dark twisted way, he had. Twice. Apparently his heart had stopped again when they were stitching up the Achilles tendons.

It had been the most nerve wracking days of his life, and that included the first time that Virgil had been hospitalized due to Remus. Logan carefully ran a thumb over Virgil’s knuckles, worried about what would happen when he woke up. He didn’t even look peaceful when he slept anymore, his face was twisted from pain and what Logan assumed were nightmares.

There was a soft knock from outside the room and then Sam came in, holding up two coffees and a bagel.

“How’s the Emo?” She sat by Logan and handed him the bagel, putting the coffees on the ground next to them.

“Virgil’s alive. Which is the only good news.” Logan took a bite from the bagel, being careful to not jostle the hand he was holding onto like a lifeline.

“So, what’s the full extent of everything?” Sam asked as she took one of the coffees and took a sip. 

“Besides what I told you at the beginning when we were going through that file, he has an infection from the tendons being severed without treatment. And he’ll probably be like this for a few weeks.” Logan put Virgil’s hand back, and he smoothed his bangs away from Virgil’s eyes. 

“Poor guy, I can’t imagine being stuck with someone as awful as... you know.” Sam handed him the other coffee and Logan accepted it gratefully. Staying up for forty two hours was starting to take a toll on his body, the caffeine was much needed.

“I guess that they were friends in high school and he was equally abusive. It makes sense as to why he was so standoffish when we first met.”

“You were pretty rude from what I heard. Pushing him down the stairs and all that.”

“Who told you that?”

“Virgil. It was in the letter for me. That and a bunch of inside jokes that we had. And also a thank you for convincing you to tell him that you liked him.” Sam smiled and took another drink. “Once this ordeal is over, I think I’ll write letters to my family. It’s a good idea, even if it’s just to stay in touch.”

Logan grunted as a response, too tired to care about how his tie was crooked and his normal slick hair was an absolute mess.

“They checked out Roman a few hours ago.” Sam said idly.

“Roman only has a few broken ribs from Q and a sprained shoulder from carrying a ninety pound abductee. He’s fine with a few days of rest and some medication.” Logan finished his bagel and crumpled the napkin in his fist. “Not accounting the crippling guilt he talked to me about. That recovery might not happen.”

Sam didn’t have a response to that and so they sat in silence, with nothing but the buzzing and beeping of machines to break the tension.

…

_ Virgil was sitting in the back of the lecture hall, holding a notebook that was turned to a page with a half finished song on it. _

_ He looked up to see that the room was empty. _

_ Strange. Usually he had a class right now, the clock on his phone read three pm, he was supposed to be having biophysics. _

_ “Excuse me, but I think I’m lost.” A familiar/unfamiliar voice interrupted his confusion. _

_ Virgil shut the notebook to see a kid standing in front of him, looking awfully serious in his square framed glasses and tie. Virgil leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, placing his chin in his hands. _

_ “Who are you?” _

_ The kid straightened his tie. “I’m Logan Berry and my mom says that you’re not allowed to laugh at my name or my necktie.” _

_ “I won’t. It seems like a serious name for a serious person.” _

_ “I’m a child, as I am under the age of thirteen and I have yet to grow. I can't be a person, persons are adults and boring.” _

_ “How old are you Logan?” Virgil asked gently. _

_ “I’m eleven. I also believe I’m lost, like I stated previously.” _

_ Virgil looked around the lecture hall, noting that there was only one door across the room. “How about that door Lolo? Your family’s probably on the other side, looking for you.” _

_ “Don’t call me Lolo! It’s Logan. You and I can’t go through that door, you’ll die.” _

_ Virgil laughed at the small Logan’s outburst and shook his head. “You’re joking, right?” _

_ Small Logan shook his head solemnly. “No.” _

_ “How do you know that I’ll die?” _

_ “I’ve watched you almost walk through it twice and both times I ceased to exist when you did, and as an intrinsic part of you, when I die, you do as well. And vice versa.” _

_ “There’s no other exits though.” _

_ Logan shrugged. “Then we have to wait.” He said as he crawled over the seat and sat next to Virgil. _

_ “Who are you?” Virgil asked again. _

_ “I’m Logan Berry, you already asked me that. Can I see your notebook? I want to draw some stars in it.” _

_ Virgil passed over the notebook and his pen. “Can I ask what you are?” _

_ The small Logan hummed an affirmative, carefully inking in dots around the lyrics that Virgil had written out. _

_ “What are you Logan?” _

_ The small child looked up at him and beamed. “I’m your brain! Subconscious desires to be exact.” _

_ “My subconscious looks like my boyfriend, but as a child?” _

_ “Yep.” Logan popped the p before continuing. “You don’t want to die and so I took a more innocent form to protect you as fear of death is quite childish. Normally I’m a lot lot taller and a lot more worried for you.” _

_ “You told me that you feared cats once.” _

_ “I’m not Logan. I just look like him and act like him because he’s the only person that we trust now.” Little Logan went back to drawing and Virgil pursed his lips. _

_ “The only person?” _

_ “Uh huh. He gave you a capri sun on the airplane ride!” Logan countered defensively.  _

_ “What does that have to do with anything?” _

_ “I dunno, it’s your brain we’re talking about.”  _

_ “Alright then Logan Berry. How long are we stuck in this lecture hall?” Virgil surveyed the room, feeling a bit jipped that his brain had trapped him in a glorified classroom of all things. _

_ “Until another door appears or you choose to walk though that exit and accept defeat.” _

_ “Huh.” Virgil sat back and crossed his arms, kicking up his feet to the seat in front of him. “I guess we’re gonna wait.” _

_ “Good, your death would be inconsequential. I mean, it would be bad. I’m having a harder time using the right words when I’m this young.” _

_ “It’s okay Logan, just keep drawing, I’ll wait for an alternative exit.” _

_ Logan swung his legs as he scribbled in another star. “Thanks Mr. Storm.” _

_ Virgil nodded and gave the kid a pat on the head. “Sure thing Mr. Berry.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Logan explicitly went to Sam and asked her if she'd help him research everything so that he didn't have to bear it alone. She agreed and promised that anything they talked about would not get back to anyone.  
> She's just like, 'I'm Virgil's mom now and you can't stop me.'


	27. giving up and getting sued

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so my family changed plans and I'm pumping this chapter out before fucking off for three weeks. I'll delete chap 27 once they come and go, so next update will probably be august 25th. love ya'll
> 
> -Starships
> 
> p.s.: did I say we were almost angst free? I lied.

Remy was sitting next to Roman as the lawyer shuffled a few papers at her desk, nervously looking up at the two.

“So, obviously Quinn Turnbeck is going to jail, we don’t even need a trial at this point, he admitted to everything that we threw at him, and so we’re only having the trial so that it’s formalized that he goes to jail until his flesh rots.”

“Great, so why have you called us here?”

“Roman’s been charged with assault and with aiding a kidnapper.” She admitted and Remy looked at her, disbelief crossing his face.

_“What?_ ”  
“Well, after Roman went to that psychoanalysis to make sure he hadn’t gone insane while he was, you know, the reports came back with Low grade Stockholm’s Syndrome. And so technically he can be charged with aiding an abductor.”

Remy gritted his teeth and from next to him, Roman put a comforting hand on his.

“So why is he being put on trial?”

“Quinn sued him.”

_ “WHAT.” _

The lawyer put up her hands as Remy surged to his feet angrily slamming his hands on the lawyer’s desk. 

“I’m here to help Remmington, please hold back your anger!” She yelled, standing as well. Remy took a step, shocked that she had risen to confront him and now they were in an awkward stalemate, with Roman still sitting.

“Sit down Remy and we can have a productive conversation.” She hissed and Remy sat down, feeling sheepish.

“Sorry for losing my temper.” Remy mumbled.

“I apologize as well. Let’s restart. I’m Miranda Santiago and I was the lawyer assigned to you because the constitution says you get a lawyer if you can’t afford one, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, Quinn sued you and it’s probably going to be an easy case, because he’s a crazy criminal and you're just a victim in a tragedy.” Miranda shook both of their hands before going back to the papers she had. “Take a look at these and then call me. You can request a different lawyer too if you want. I don’t get paid enough for this shit, but I’ve never lost a case that’s been handed to me.”

“Thanks Miranda.” Roman accepted the papers that she offered them, staying infuriatingly calm, considering the fact that he was being sued for self defense. Remy wanted to stand and throw the paperweight on the lawyer’s desk, overturn his seat and then storm out to go on an epic quest to kick Turnbeck in the ass. 

But with what was happening to Roman, if Remy went to beat up Turnbeck, he’d probably get sued too and they didn’t need to deal with that right now. After clearing up a few things with Miranda, they left her office with a crap ton of paperwork to do.

Roman swung their hands as they walked back to the AirBNB- they were cycling shifts at the hospital- and Remy felt a pang of sadness when he realized that since being released from the hospital, Roman hadn’t mentioned his birthday once.

What kind of person had been hurt so badly they didn’t even want to acknowledge the passage of time?

Remy didn’t realize he had stopped walking until Roman gave a small tug on his hand.

“You okay?” He heard Roman ask faintly.

Remy closed his eyes sadly. “Do you really trust them?”

The city was silent, he was in a bubble with Roman as people walked around them, all living their lives, all hellishly unaware of the charged question that Remy had given.

Roman’s hand fell out of his.

“I don’t know.”

Remy took a step back. “Why Roman?”

They stood like that for almost five minutes, neither moving, hardly breathing. If someone had walked by the pair, they could have mistaken them for street performers.

Roman broke first, tears streaming down his face. “I don’t know Remy. I don’t know why I let myself care about anyone. I’ll see you back at the AirBNB.” He shoved the paperwork at him and then turned and left, disappearing into the crowds before Remy could even protest.

Remy waited a beat before turning and walking off in the opposite direction.

He couldn’t deal with it right now.

…

_ “Logan?” _

_ “Yeah?” _

_ “I’m bored.” Virgil got up from his seat and began to wander around the room, looking at the blank walls. Little Logan looked up from what he was drawing, a lion on an empty page, and shrugged. _

_ “I can’t do much than remind you that you wanna keep living.” _

_ “I think I’m gonna walk through the door.” _

_ “You're a masochist.” Logan threw a pen at him and shook his head nervously. “But I can’t stop you.” _

_ Virgil was across the room now, about six feet from the door and he looked back at his subconscious. “Why weren’t you here the first time I almost died?” _

_ “I was. Are you talking about when you saved Logan a year ago?” _

_ “Yes.” Virgil gritted his teeth and turned away from the door so that he was staring down the eleven year old from across the lecture hall. _

_ “I let you hear everything they were saying, you weren’t trapped and on the brink. We were close to death, but not like this.” Little Logan stood and disappeared, reappearing next to Virgil and holding out a hand. “Come back, I want you to see the lion I’m drawing.” _

_ “How long have I been like this?” Virgil asked, tears pricking at his eyes. _

_ Logan sighed mournfully, a strange image to see with a child. “I don’t know.” _

_ “And if when we wake up, what if it’s been years? Logan, what if I NEVER WAKE up. I’d rather die than be stuck here until someone else decides to pull the plug.” He was yelling now, his broken voice causing the room to rattle. Virgil sat down in front of the door, furiously wiping away tears. _

_ “It won’t be years.” Little Logan sat next to him and he looked at Virgil with worry crossing his features. _

_ “You can’t know everything, you’re just what I want. I don’t want to die, I don’t want to be like this for years, I want my best friend and my boyfriend back. The only thing that we know is what I’ve learned and what we want.” Virgil stopped rambling when he realized that he was kinda just telling himself stuff he already knew. _

_ Logan sighed again and Virgil sighed as well, unsure of what to do. _

_ “You’re right Virgil. I’m sort of a last hurrah,” Logan’s voice deepened and when Virgil looked over in shock, he was surprised to see that he was staring at the Logan he’d last seen, a Logan with his hair slicked back and a borrowed hoodie, “if you want to go, I can’t stop you my wildcat.” _

_ “You can’t?” _

_ “No. Just know that he loved you.” adult Logan shifted form again, becoming the small and scarred Virgil from ninth grade. “After all, it’s just us in the end.” _

_ Virgil stared into the scared eyes of himself, a child who had feared his family, who had been hurt his whole life, who had run at every turn.  _

_ “It’s just us in the end.” _

_ He stood and offered a hand to himself, who took it. The pair turned and looked at the door.  _

_ “Do you think it’s scary? Dying?” Virgil asked his subconscious. In reality, he’s asking himself a question that he’s always feared the answer to, but he doesn't want to think of all the technicals and what ifs of talking to yourself. _

_ “I wouldn’t know, I’ve never died.” the fourteen year old replied calmly. “But I don’t think that we need to be scared of death anymore. There’s much worse things out there.” _

_ And then they took a step forward together and opened the door. _

_ … _

Sam was sleeping when the sound abruptly awoke her.

Or rather, the lack of sound.

Virgil was flatlining.

“LOGAN!” She shook him awake and then lunged forward, slamming the emergency button as nurses began to flood into the room, pushing her and Logan aside as they pulled out equipment and started chest compressions.

Logan was holding onto her, tears streaming down his face as he made no sound and they watched one of the nurses pull out a syringe and jam it into the center of Virgil’s chest.

“One minute of compressions, unresponsive!” 

Sam held Logan closer, watching as the nurses continued, as nothing worked until five harrowing minutes later when the heart monitor finally beeped back online and Logan slumped with relief against her.

“I can’t lose him.”

“I know Lo, we just have to keep waiting.” Sam muttered as the majority of the people exited the room, leaving a nurse and a doctor.

“What was in that big ass shot?” 

“Adrenaline.” The doctor looked up from where he was rewriting something in his notes, “it’s a big risk though, we’re moving him to twenty four hour watch again and we have to kick you two out until he’s stable again.”

“What caused this?”

“The heart can stop for a multi--”

“You don’t know.” Logan’s voice was cold and Sam flinched when he pulled away. “You have no idea and it scares you.”

“Logan, come on.” Sam said gently and he shot one last glare at the doctor before following her out.

“I wish that I could help him. If I was a doctor, or had magic psychic powers or had found Turnbeck sooner, I could have been there for him, I could’ve found out about the texts sooner--”

“Stop.” Sam put her hand up. “You can’t beat yourself up over the hypotheticals anymore.”

Logan paused his pacing and crossed his arms, preparing for a debate. “Why?”

“Because it’s incredibly unhealthy.” Sam shifted her voice and tone until she sounded uncannily like Logan. “That is not what a mutually beneficial relationship would look like.”

Logan glared at her attempt to use his logic and she shrugged. “We’re all just trying our best Logan.”

“It’s been two weeks, he should be stable by now, logically speaking.”

“It’s not the first time that logic has failed the medical world.” Sam countered gently. “Maybe the reason why Virgil isn’t getting better is because he doesn’t want to.”

Logan started to pace again and he looked at her, the hope leaving his eyes.

“And if I have to make the choice? To let him die, to give up. What then Sam?”

To that, she had no response.

…

_ Virgil was thrown out of the door, heartbeat loud in his ears as he crashed backwards into the lecture hall’s seats. _

_ “Holy fuck.” He gasped as pain flared up his chest, he felt like someone had shot him, gosh why did not dying have to hurt? _

_ He looked up for his subconscious, seeing them a few feet away, they’d shifted into the small Logan again, and they were rubbing at a shallow cut in their forehead. _

_ “I don’t think we’re allowed to die.” Logan looked at the blood smeared on their hand and then at Virgil. “You have a cut on your cheek.” _

_ “You have a fucking gash in your forehead Lo.” _

_ “It’s Logan.” _

_ “Am I seriously having a fight with my subconscious?” _

_ “Yes.” _

_ “UGHHHH.” _

_ Virgil felt his cheek, Logan was right, there was a cut there and he stood, wobbling over to the child. _

_ “Virgil?” _

_ “What?” _

_ “The door’s gone. I don’t think you have a choice on if you live or die anymore.” Logan looked up at him fearfully and Virgil shrugged. _

_ “I’ve never had a choice before.” He helped Logan to a sitting position and brushed his fingers across the cut in the kid’s forehead. _

_ “I didn’t think that we could get hurt.” Logan whimpered and Virgil folded the younger into a hug. _

_ “Not your fault.” _

_ “I’m supposed to stop you, don’t you wanna live?” _

_ “I don’t know.” Virgil admitted quietly.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *thumbs up for kudos and comments*
> 
> everything Q sues Roman for has been done in a court before, I did research. (aka, I asked my college law teacher and he said it was chill.)


	28. In an Alternate Universe, Janus could've been a lawyer. (Patton can see it.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan punches Q  
> Patton and Janus talk   
> Roman and Remy talk  
> Virgil and Subconscious!Logan find another door  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, I'm back and I'm publishing again, which means that the note that was chap 27 will be deleted.   
> also, if you support trump, get the fuck out of my fic.

Patton sat in the crowd that was watching the public trial. They hadn’t needed him to come, but he wanted to be the one to smile when Logan looked back, he wanted to watch as Roman shakily admitted to the abuse that had left him mentally shattered.

And he wanted to be the one who punched Turnbeck in the face, but Logan had beat him to it, punching the kidnapper on live TV, which Patton had to admit, was pretty badass.

It took the jury a half hour to decide guilty.

The judge stood and looked down at the people below and Patton could’ve sworn that he saw a flash of fury before the judge’s face was a cool mask.

“Death is not a punishment for a criminal such as Quinn Turnbeck. For him, it would be a mercy. For a human who has committed such egregious crimes, death would not be justice. Which is why I’m sentencing you, Quinn Turnbeck, to one hundred and fifteen years in penitentiary.”

A couple gasps rippled through the room. The judge continued without acknowledging it.

“You may ask why I’m giving you such a heavy sentence. You may be thinking that this is odd. Well guess what Mr. Turnbeck? You have hospitalized an innocent man, someone who may never see the light of day, someone who may never walk again or fall in love or ever have the chance to make something of themselves in this world. Virgil Storm may never, and I repeat  _ never  _ have a chance of normality again. And so, yes, I sentence you to a life chained, so that you may never have that chance either.”

The gavel went down.

Patton felt a surge of relief when they took Q away, and he made his way through the crowd to rejoin Logan, who looked carefully blank.

“Hello Patton.”

“Hey. I’m sorry that you had to go through this again.”

Logan sighed and took off his glasses. “I am too. I have to get back to the hospital. I’ll see you around.”

Patton was left standing alone, as Logan said goodbye and exited. Slowly, the crowd trickled out until he was the only one, standing in the courtroom.

“You know, my mother always thought that I’d make a great lawyer.”

Patton turned to see Janus standing in the back, almost as if he was waiting to be let in.

“Why?”

“She thought that I could twist words well.” Janus walked in, cane tapping the ground as he made his way to Patton. “Of course, the whole melted face thing threw off her dream.”

“Good thing it didn’t throw off your dreams.”

“Hmmmm. I might not be a Picani, but I can hope that one day I’ll be a psychologist.”

Patton looked around at the room, the dark wood paneling and he shuddered. “I think that there’s a certain lack of morals that’s abandoned when you become a lawyer.”

“Perhaps. But the world isn’t so black and white.” Janus nodded thoughtfully.

“I guess you could say that clean cut morals is a pigment of your imagination.” Patton snorted out.

“You just made a pun in a courtroom.”

“Well, I don’t see anyone law and ordering me not to.”

“Stop please.” Janus threw a hand over his face dramatically. “It’s too much.”

“I can’t. You could say that I’m marching to the beat of my gavel.” Patton cringed. “That one didn’t work as well.”

“I appreciate the attempt.”

“Do you believe what the judge said? About Virgil never being able to return to normal?” Patton asked suddenly.

“Yes.” Janus moved so that he was standing next to him. “I don’t think any of us will ever be how we once were.”

“Never is a long time.” Patton murmured to the almost empty room. “Let’s go Janus.”

…

Roman ended up not getting sued, apparently you lost a lot of rights when you became a criminal. 

He was sitting on the balcony now, with Remy as they watched the sun set. Roman tightened his grip on Remy’s hand and looked down.

“I feel bad, for not being hurt more. If I had been able to take the pain, I would’ve.”

“Ro, you can’t blame yourself, I see that now.” Remy looked at him, and Roman nodded wearily. 

“I still do and I will until the day I die.”

“I know Roman. You were always the hero.”

“I’m not a hero. Not anymore Remy.”

…

_ Virgil ran his hands along the wall. There was the smallest hairline fracture in the wall, the outline of a door. _

_ “Logan? I think I found something.” _

_ “What is it?” _

_ “A hidden door of some sort.” Virgil tugged at the fracture, and he stumbled back as the wall fell away to reveal a beautiful ebony door, one that was laced with silver filigree and shimmered with undertones of lavender. _

_ “Are you sure that this isn’t the death door?” _

_ Logan finally looked up. “You could walk through it and find out.” _

_ “After what happened last time we tried to go through a door? Hard pass.” Virgil paused and then shrugged. “You know what, fuck it, let’s see where this one goes. Come on Logan.” _

_ Little Logan jumped up and ran over, taking Virgil’s hand. “Cool.” _

_ He reached for the handle and pulled the door open. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed! I'm glad to be back!  
> comments? kudos?
> 
> I love ya'll!
> 
> -Starships


	29. I am flesh and I am bone, arise (ting ting) like glitter and gold.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan, six weeks after Quinn Turnbeck's trial.  
> Virgil   
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy.

“His wrist healed up nicely and he’s gained some weight. Still not in the healthy range for someone who’s 6’1” but at least his organs aren’t failing left and right.” The doctor tapped his clipboard before looking up at Logan. “I’m sure he’ll wake up on his own within the next twenty four hours.”

Logan looked at Virgil, who was still asleep, and nodded. “Okay. It’s only been six weeks of being in a coma, not years.”

“Exactly. Virgil might be a bit discombobulated when he wakes up, so just be careful and don’t try to scare him.”

Logan bit back a snarky comment about hospitals and moved aside so that the doctor could leave.

Everyone else had flown back to Florida two weeks ago. Everyone except Sam and him. It had seemed unfair to force them to stay when they had their own lives to get back to, jobs, family. Sam had left and then less than an hour later, she’d come back saying that she wasn’t going to abandon her best friend like this.

Logan slumped into his chair. It wasn’t his per say, but he’d been here long enough, spent enough countless nights sitting there that he was slightly tempted to buy it.

“Hey Virgil. I know that you’ve been through hell, but I said that I’d… I’ll be there for you.” Logan crossed his fingers over his heart, “promise.”

Virgil didn’t respond and Logan sighed softly, carefully reaching out a hand and holding Virgil’s. 

No response, just a slight flinch like every time a nurse came in to adjust something, or when Logan held his hand. Abuse wired so deeply into his brain that he reacted even when he was completely comatose.

Part of Logan didn’t want him to wake up. Part of him that didn’t want to see if Virgil didn’t want to be with him anymore.

It was to these troubled thoughts that he fell asleep.

...

_ “Virgil?” _

_ “Yeah Little Logan?” _

_ “I can’t come any further.” _

_ “Why?” _

_ “This hallway is leading back to consciousness and I’m your subconscious. There’s just some places I can’t interact with you like this.” _

_ “Ah. I’ll miss you.”  _

_ “It’s okay. You’ll have real Logan to help you.” _

_ … _

Logan felt the grip on his hand tighten slightly. He yawned and opened his eyes to see the Virgil had turned his head and was staring at him.

“Virgil?” He asked, breathless.

“Hey Lo.” Virgil’s voice was barely above a whisper, and hoarse from lack of use. Logan moved his chair closer, crying with relief.

“You remember me. You woke up.” Logan took his other hand and ran it though Virgil’s hair, almost yelling with excitement when Virgil didn’t flinch, just held onto his hand tighter.

“Water?”

“Of course, I’ll get you some. Anything you need.” Logan let go of Virgil’s hand to grab one of the hospital water bottles. “It’s a good thing that they read your records, they were gonna put you on a feeding tube and then someone saw what happened last time--” Logan opened the water and carefully helped Virgil take a drink, “they decided not to.”

Virgil gave him a faint smile, before closing his eyes.

“I need to tell the doctor that you’re awake.” Logan reached for the button that’d summon a nurse when Virgil made a panicked sound that stopped him. 

“What’s wrong?”

Virgil didn’t respond, he just shifted in the hospital bed, turning away from Logan and curling in on himself.

Logan didn’t press him, but he had to let someone know that Virgil was up, so he pressed the call button. 

A nurse came in, saw that Virgil was awake and then he backed out of the room before Logan could ask where he was going. About five minutes later, he returned, this time with a doctor that Logan had only seen a few times. Their name tag read Dr. Alamar, they/them. 

“Hello Virgil. Glad to see that you’re up and at them, you had us worried for a few days there.” Dr. Alamar carefully approached, every movement slow as they walked up to the bed. They pulled a clipboard off of the heart monitor and looked at it. “How would you rate your pain right now?”

Logan watched as Virgil answered the questions hesitantly, slowly warming up to Alamar’s presence and kind tone.

Neither were prepared when Virgil asked the question.

“How long has it been since I got here?”

…

Virgil felt awful.

His head was spinning and he was pretty sure that the vision in his right eye was impared as everything looked a bit murky when he tried to focus on the calendar across the room.

At least Logan was there, and that right now was the only thing keeping him from spiraling at the strange location and the feel of the sheets trapping him in the bed, the needles in his hand and arm, wires snaking under his hospital gown and the cannula in his nose.

“How long has it been since I got here?”

Silence. The doctor, their name was Adams or something, didn’t respond, just looked at Logan. Virgil turned his head to Logan, knowing that he’d answer.

Logan looked down. “Six weeks.”

No.

That wasn’t possible, it was March, he’d been with Q for who knows how long, but it couldn’t have been longer than a few weeks or so, he was sure of it, but the days had all started to blend together after he’d been locked in the soundproof room, and yet Virgil couldn’t believe that he had been here that long.

“Please don’t joke Logan, it’s not funny.”

“You know that I can’t tell a joke to save my life V.”

Virgil froze at the nickname, brain shutting down and he was thrown back to that room, the cuts stinging, Q laughing harshly as he dragged a knife across Virgil’s cheek, whispering threats in a low voice.

Virgil closed his eyes and blocked out Q, wishing that it’d end, that he’d stop and leave him alone, that he’d just kill him so that Virgil didn’t have to live with the fact that he was stuck here…

“Virgil?” Logan’s voice popped the memory and he remembered that he wasn’t there anymore, he was in a hospital.

“yeah?” Virgil didn’t open his eyes, he hated how weak his voice sounded now, it felt like he was being watched by too many people and he just wanted to go back to sleep and wake up from this nightmare.

“Is everything okay?”

“no.” 

Dr. Adams, or whatever their name was, spoke up. “I know that it’s a lot to process, but we’re going to make sure that you can transfer back into regular life as smoothly as possible. It’s going to be a long road, but you could have a full recovery in a few years.”

Virgil nodded, not really processing the words, eyes still closed as he blocked out the lights, the sound of beeping as he slowly slipped back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no, Virgil does not remember Subconscious!Logan, or his time that he spent stuck in the lecture hall. His last memory is of Q cutting his Achilles tendons, which happened roughly three days before Roman opened the door and found Virgil.   
> the nickname V is a trigger and so is the sound of a pen clicking, those two were the main triggers in this chapter. (Q may or may not have stabbed him with a pen at somepoint.)


	30. define alive and well.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> texting  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> logan has Virgil's phone, it's unsure what happened to his after Virgil was abducted.
> 
> Sam and jess and AceBasketcase and PanSisteral

_ July 24th, 3:30 A.m. EST _

wet blanket: Virgil woke up.

DAD<3: !!!!!!

Princey: Is he okay?!?

wet blanket: He’s alive, confused and still on too much medication to fully process what’s going on. I was just informing you that he officially woke up.

DAD<3: :/ we’ll keep you three in our thoughts

Princey: What does he remember?

wet blanket: Unsure. He recalls me, but he was only awake for about twenty minutes before falling back asleep. He’ll have to go through some tests when he wakes up.

Princey: You should get some sleep Lo, it sounds like it’s gonna be busy tomorrow.

wet blanket: *going

wet blanket: I’ll text again tomorrow.

DAD<3: Gn!

Princey: Good night Logan.

Janus: What tf just happened?

Janus: oh wait, nevermind

Janus: Tell Virgil that I send him my love.

...

_ July 24th, 3:47 am, EST _

purble: Virgil woke up for a bit.

Sam: thank Crofters.

purble: He’s not doing well.

Sam: PTSD episode?

purble: I believe that it was from a nickname, V.

Sam: Q and V. Of course Q would ruin a name like that, I’m so sorry.

Sam: What a bastard, if you hadn’t punched him, I would’ve.

purble: I know.

Sam: You need to get some rest though.

purble: You’re still up

Sam: I was setting up a few things.

purble: See you at seven.

Sam: ttyl.

Sam: What coffee do you want, before you go

purble: Black with a shot of cream please.

Sam: sure thing.

…

_ July 24th, 3:52 am, EST _

AceBasketcase: Virgil was awake

PanSisteral: yay

PanSisteral: I was asleep, but this is cooler than resting. Is he okay?

AceBasketcase: That’s for us to hope.

PanSisteral: cool

PanSisteral: Call me tomorrow.

AceBasketcase: you mean that by later today?

PanSisteral: duh. Go get some sleep.

AceBasketcase: love you dork

PanSisteral: gm nerd.

…

_ July 24th, 8:30 am, EST _

Sam: On my way!

purble: Virgil just woke up again, so be careful, he’s jittery

Sam: Of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments?  
> kudos?


	31. A broken song through an empty hall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted a bit of fluff before Virgil's released from the hospital  
> chaos ensues. (it's tradition at this point, even if chaos isn't ensuing)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter, I'm sorry, the next one will be longer

Sam entered the hospital carrying enough food to feed her and Logan for at least twenty four hours.  
The receptionist didn’t even look up at her entrance, no doubt used to her constantly walking in and out of the building. Sam made her way up to the third floor, and quietly entered Virgil’s room.  
“Hey Logan. Brought you the coffee.” She held out the drink for him to take, acknowledging Virgil with a nod.  
“Good morning Virgil.” Sam waved and Virgil turned his eyes to her before flinching and looking away. Sam slid into the seat next to Logan and pulled out a bag of chips.  
She opened the chips and nestled the bag between her and Logan, a silent offering of food for when he was ready.  
The day passed quietly, a few medical professionals coming in and out, Logan working on something on the laptop that he had and Sam spent most of her time writing out the conversions that she had heard in the halls to clear up some brain space.  
Overall, she could pretend that nothing was wrong.  
But pretending only takes you so far.  
…  
Logan had found a guitar during the six weeks that Virgil slept. It had been in the window of a pawn shop and Logan had felt so lost, so alone, that something about the dusty instrument had called him to buy it. He’d been learning on and off before New York, and now with ages of free time, Logan had mastered a few songs.  
Logan pulled out the guitar once he was sure that Virgil was asleep. The guitar had cost him fifty dollars and it had been worth it.  
He started to pick out a melody, not really paying attention to which way it went, just letting it flow. The music filled the room and Logan didn’t realize that he was playing a familiar tune until Virgil’s voice broke his concentration.  
“It’s our song..”  
Logan nodded. “Yes.”  
“You learned how to play it.”  
“I wanted to help you after your first accident, and this was the way that I thought of.”  
“It’s beautiful.” Virgil must’ve moved or something, because there was a rustling sound and then his broken voice started to mix with the guitar.  
 _Pipeline dreams is where it all went wrong…_  
…  
Dominic was just a night shift nurse. He had worked at the hospital for five years, and honestly thought that nothing could surprise him anymore.  
That was until tonight. He was up on the third floor, doing his rounds when the sound of a hopeful duet grabbed his attention, causing him to quietly sneak down to see where it was coming from.  
There was a small crowd of nurses gathered outside the room, he recognized it as Storm’s and one of the younger nurses had her phone out, apparently filming the thing as the rest listened on.  
Dominic hadn’t heard music in the hospital for a long time. There was something about this song though that seemed to scream ‘we’ll make it’ and when the final notes finally faded out, he was in tears, and not the only one.  
The group outside the door all made eye contact, a silent agreement forming. Storm and Berry were not going to find out that they’d listened in. Dominic turned away from the door and set back off, a few other nurses trailing behind him.  
Even as he got home at three am the next day, the song was still stuck in his head, a haunting melody floating through empty hallways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos?  
> comments?


	32. To build, To break, To repair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> virgil, patton, roman
> 
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy
> 
> also, half of my hair's purple and I'm beta reading a really good sanders sides story, it's called: Of Braids and Boredom, you should go read it, here's the link~ https://archiveofourown.org/works/20756510/chapters/49320326

“You can go home.” Dr. Alamar said cheerily, their smile almost blinding.

Virgil wasn’t listening, Q had told him that he could go home and then he’d sent Remus in to drag hot metal across his stomach, leaving burns that  _ hurt _ . Remus had said that he was Virgil’s new home. So when someone gave that promise, he wasn’t exactly inclined to believe them, although Dr. Alamar  _ had _ been nothing but nice.

“Virgil? There’s going to be a nurse to remove your I.V., can they help you?” Alamar’s hand was hovering above his shoulder, not touching, but in Virgil’s line of sight enough to pull him out of the memory of second degree burns on flesh.

He looked up, the words sinking in before nodding slowly. From next to him, Logan handed him a notebook and pen.

_ Thank you.  _ Virgil scribbled it out in a messy half cursive and Dr. Alamar nodded.

“Of course. I need to talk with Logan, can I borrow him?”

_ Bring him back. _

“I will, we’re just going to go over prescriptions that you guys will need to pick up before going back to Florida.”

Logan gave him a comforting smile and left, leaving Virgil to wait for the nurse. Virgil wasn’t quite sure where Sam was, but she hadn’t been around for almost three days and Logan had said that it was fine, that she’d come back so that they could drive back down to where home was.

Home.

Virgil wasn’t sure where home was anymore. There was a brief tugging at his hand and he watched as a nurse took out the I.V. and then the horrible nose cannula that he had pulled out accidentally far too many times in the three weeks that he’d been awake and adjusting to the fact that he’d lost five months to Q and Remus.

That wasn’t even including the physical therapy that he had ahead. Or the fact that it was going to take  _ years _ to get his muscle mass back, years until he’d be a functioning adult again. Virgil looked down at his scar covered arms and held back tears.

Would anything ever go back to normal?

…

Logan watched as Alamar wrote something down on the list and then clicked their tongue before passing it over.

“Anti-anxiety, Anti-depressant, um, pain killers, taper him off those after the first week, Migraine medication and specialty crutches for at least nine months. If the fog in his right eye doesn’t clear up, you might have to go to a specialty optometrist.” Dr. Alamar handed Logan the list, which was paired with a few other packets of nutrition and recommendations of doctors in Florida.

“You know, I wish that I had met you and Virgil on better terms.” Alamar said as Logan put the papers in the file that he had ready.

“I really can’t thank you enough for all the help that you’ve given us over the past few months.”

“Just doing my job, healing people the best I can. You two stay safe out there.”

“We will.” Logan vowed as he gave Alamar one last handshake. The pair walked back to Virgil’s room, where a nurse was helping Virgil transition to a wheelchair.

“You ready to bust out of here?” Alamar asked good-naturedly and Virgil nodded silently.

Logan shrugged on his backpack and picked up the guitar case before standing next to the wheelchair.

“Sam should be outside with a rental car.”

The thing about hospital issued wheelchairs is that they’re an absolute  _ hell _ to move. It took them almost ten minutes until they were completely outside. Sam was there, leaning against the door and she smiled when Logan helped Virgil stand and transfer to the backseat.

“So, Logan. You gonna sit in the front or the back? I don’t mind taking the first leg of the trip.” Sam slipped into the driver’s side and looked back at Logan, who shrugged.

“If Virgil’s okay with it, I would prefer to stay back here.”

Virgil tapped a yes out in Morse and then they were off.

…

Patton was wrapped around Janus when his phone went off, distracting the pair from the movie that they were watching on the too small IPod screen.

He reached for the phone and looked at the screen, realizing that he couldn’t read what the text said, his glasses weren’t on.

“Janus? Can you read this for me?”

“Sure.” Janus squinted at the screen for a moment before smiling. “Logan’s on his way back with Virgil.”

“Yay!”

“He asked that you don’t throw a welcome back party.”

Patton deflated a bit and Janus put the phone back on the dresser. “That just means that we get more cuddle time.”

“Yeah, but I want to be there for him…”

“How about we make cookies or something?”

“And chili.”

“It’s August.”

“That didn’t stop me last time.” Patton pressed a kiss to Janus’s cheek and smirked. “And you said that you liked it.”

“Your chili is very good.” Janus admitted with a sigh. “Can we finish the movie before we do? I’m very comfortable right now.”

Patton nodded and they went back to the movie, with Janus watching the movie and Patton watching Janus. 

“Patton?” Janus asked about five minutes later, right before the climax of the movie.

“Hmm?”

“Will you marry me?”

“You know the answer to that.”

“Not yet?”

“Yep.”

They had this conversation weekly, and the banter was always the same. So far, Patton had been proposed to at the airport, at the grocery store next to the cereal, while they were at the park (he felt kinda bad saying no for that one, but alas Janus had taken it in stride.) and in the campus library. 

At this point, it’s more of a joke, one that they both know the answer to, a question that doesn’t need to be asked but is anyway.

Patton wondered what it would be like if he said yes. 

…

Roman was sitting back to back with Remy when Patton texted him and asked him to come back to the condo.

“Who is it?” Remy doesn’t turn, after all, they’re working on building trust and so Roman responds as he’s typing out an answer to Patton.

“Padre wants me back at the condo.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I’ll tell him that I’ll come over once we’re done, there’s ten minutes left in this exercise.” Roman sends off the text and puts the phone away carefully. “Virgil’s coming back.”

“That’s nice to hear.” Remy shifted and Roman crossed his ankles, fiddling with some embroidery floss that he had been braiding prior to the call.

“He doesn’t remember that I got him out.”

“Well, I do.”

“I just don’t want him to think that I was okay with everything that happened. I mean, I was the one who built the room, I’m basically an enabler.” Roman knotted the end of the braid and flung it over his shoulder at Remy, who probably caught it.

“Sugar, V’s gonna be okay. He’s gonna trust you.”

_ Trust. _

What a broken word. Roman closed his eyes and leaned his head back, thinking about the last six months, wondering when the word had been first broken. Roman’s hands fluttered nervously, there wasn’t anything for them to do and so he fidgeted to keep them distracted.

He’s not as sure as Remy with that word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments? 
> 
> I don't know if I should even be asking for kudos at this point, you're thirty two chapters into the fucking sequel.
> 
> eh, kudos?


	33. Welcome home?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The New York three return  
> chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, remember when Remus shaved off his mustache in chapter nineteen?
> 
> and remember that he's Roman's twin?
> 
> And remember that Remus was definitely torturing Virgil?
> 
> And remember that Virgil doesn't remember that Roman was there for the great escape?
> 
> yeah.... roman angst hours

Jess was at the condo when Sam, Logan and Virgil pulled in at the horrible hour of two am. Her sister had stumbled in, and collapsed on the beanbag without a word of greeting, too tired from driving eight hours straight on the last leg of the journey..

Logan had come in after, carrying a sleeping Virgil and they had disappeared upstairs, leaving the rest of the group to stare at each other.

“How was New York?” Jess tried. Sam looked up and dramatically flopped a hand across her face.

“Absolute hell as all big cities are. How are all you guys, it’s been almost a month since we’ve all been in the same room.”

“Janus keeps proposing.” Patton said cheerfully.

“Patton keeps declining.” Remy added helpfully and Sam snorted.

“Rip your love life Snake.” 

The conversation died after that, mostly because there wasn’t anything to talk about and they were all exhausted for different reasons. Jess wanted to wait until morning to see her friend, but with how her sister was already half dead on the beanbag, she figured that they could come back tomorrow.

…

Janus watched as Jess dragged out Sam, the rest of the household floated off to their rooms, and Remy took his leave through the back door.

He however, continued to sit on the couch until Logan came down and sat next to him.

“Hello nerd.”

“Salutations.”

“How are you?”

“Virgil’s fine.”

“Logan, I asked how  _ you _ are doing.” Janus turned the scarred side of his face towards him and the nerd looked at him blankly before silently dissolving into tears. Janus held out a hand and Logan took it as he sobbed.

“I… I can’t sleep and when I do, Q’s there and he’s taking him away and I can’t do anything about it.” Logan choked out and Janus was surprised on the run on sentence, but his friend wasn’t done spilling just yet.

“I have to be strong, I promised Virgil that I would be there for him, but I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up. I want to be able to be strong, but Janus, I’m not a robot, what happened hurt me too—” Logan broke off with another sob and Janus ran his thumb over Logan’s knuckles, wishing that he had a tissue to offer.

“I know Logan.”

Because he does. He knows what it’s like to bottle the emotions, to put on a strong face for everyone as your heart shattered a little bit each time the ones that you cared about got hurt.

He knows what it’s like to be Logan and so he listens and he offers words of comfort. What he doesn’t know, is that his friend hasn’t cried for months, that he’s been holding back so much pain.

Eventually, Logan’s sobbing fades into sniffling and he lets go of Janus’s hand to wipe at his red eyes.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize for showing emotion Logan. I’m always a great shoulder to cry on.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course. You should get some sleep though, you’ve been up for at least thirty hours.”

Logan nodded and stood, leaving Janus to sit alone in the darkness of the living room as he thought about what Logan had told him.

Gosh, Picani was going to be so overworked by the time Logan and Virgil were settled in enough to visit.

…

Roman was up early the next day, determined to make today the best day possible for all parties involved.

He was in the kitchen, making pancakes when Patton came downstairs, hair messed up from sleeping on it wrong and his glasses were on crooked.

“Good morning!” Roman chirped out as Patton grabbed a glass and filled it with water, dumping most of it on his face.

“Hi!”

“Are you good?” Roman flipped a pancake as Patton nodded.

“Looks like my brain isn’t awake yet! I’ll be fine in a minute.” Patton refilled his water and walked out, leaving Roman to continue cooking. 

He was only alone for a few minutes before Logan came downstairs, wrapped up in a hoodie and his hair done, unlike Patton.

“Good morning calculator!”

“Ah yes, the insufferable nicknames, I’ve missed them.” Logan started to make coffee and Roman nodded.

“We all missed you guys.” He finished with the pancakes and put the plate in the microwave. “Breakfast is ready.”

Logan moved to sit at the table as Roman walked out of the kitchen.

“Would I be fine waking Virgil up?”

“He’s awake, you can just knock and then open the door. He told me that he wanted to come down himself.”

Roman climbed upstairs, knocking on Janus’s door, which prompted a quiet ‘fuck you’ and then sound of a pillow hitting a human. He moved on to stand in front of Virgil’s door, knocking carefully.

“Virgil?”

…

He heard the sound of the door opening and suddenly,  _ Remus _ was there, staring him down with a sickening sweet grin. 

Virgil scrambled back on his bed, curling up into a ball and tucking his head out of sight, and the footsteps grew closer.

“Virgil? You okay?”

No..

_ NO, stay away. _

A hand on his shoulder.

Virgil twisted and hissed, biting at the hand and Remus recoiled, stumbling back, he was so mad, Virgil couldn’t control himself....

He couldn’t speak, and so he just screamed.

…

Logan was up in the room before Roman had even backtracked enough steps to get out of the bedroom.

Virgil was shaking on the ground, hands clawing at his hair and Logan crouched down next to him, looking into blank eyes.

“Virgil, _ breathe. _ ” Logan gently grabbed Virgil’s hands, keeping his voice steady as his boyfriend slowly calmed down, the fog in his face slowly clearing as he started crying.

“I’m sorry…”

Logan pulled Virgil to him, adjusting from a crouch into a sitting position so that he could hold him.

“You don’t have to apologize. What happened?”

“Remus came in….”

The words sunk in and Logan exhaled softly. “I see.”

Well, there was another trigger to add to the list.

Roman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment below if you want me to release virgil's list of triggers and medical synopsis. I wrote it out back in the good old days of the first fic and so if you guys want it, you can have it.
> 
> I now have a discord server! [Here it is!!!](https://discord.gg/kFZCXg)


	34. To learn to trust again~

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picani gets a surprise visitor.  
> chaos ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy!

Emile Picani considered himself to be a pretty chill professor. He gave out his phone number freely to struggling students and he had quit his well paying job as a psychologist so that he could teach people how to apply their degree. On top of that, he also offered free therapy during his office hours, something that many students had taken up over the course of the two semesters that he had taught there.

So when a certain Virgil came crutching in, he smiled warmly but didn’t move from his seat.

“Hello, it’s great to see you again.”

Virgil nodded and sat down. “Yeah. No one knows I’m here.”

“That sounds slightly reckless, how’d you get over?” Emile asked as Virgil pointed to the crutches.

“It took awhile, but I had to get out.”

“Can I text Logan and let him know that you’re with me?”

“Sure.” Virgil said woodenly as Emile sent a quick text to Remy, who would probably text Roman, who would in turn text Logan…

Maybe he should’ve gotten Logan’s number after their first therapy session almost a year ago. Well, Emile wasn’t exactly known for doing things the easy way, and so he sat down and pulled out his purple notebook, which was reserved for the disaster condo.

“So, wadiya wanna talk about?”  
“I saw Remus in Roman.” Virgil admitted quietly and Emile nodded, writing it down.

“So like an evil Morty?”

Virgil stared at Emile. “You watch that?”

“It is a cartoon.”

“But you seem more like the My Little Pony and the bright side of Disney kinda cartoon lover, not the crass humor of an adult show.” 

Emile furrowed his brow. “But it’s a cartoon.”

“Sausage party is a cartoon.”

“Sausage party is rated R.”

“Fair enough.” Virgil conceded as he leaned back carefully, still on high alert, but slowly becoming used to Picani’s comforting presence.

“Back to evil Morty. Do you remember who he is?”

“Yeah, he wanted to kill Rick for some really dumb reason.”

“Exactly. Roman and his brother are like Morty and evil Morty. One is inherently good, albeit a bit prideful at times, and the other wants to hurt everyone that stands in their way. ”

“What does this have to do with me?”  
“Rick didn’t push away Morty when he found out there was an evil half.” Emile pushed his glasses back up and looked at Virgil. “It’s okay to have an amount of distrust, especially with what you’ve been through, but at some point, there’s a choice that you’re going to have to make.”

“And what choice is that?”

“If you’re going to trust again.” Emile said simply.

…

Virgil sat in silence for a moment and then he grabbed his crutches and left, not bothering to say where he was going.

The way that Dr. Picani had put it, made it sound like it was easy, that he could just snap his fingers and boom, trust acquired.

He crutched out of the building and to a nearby bench, sitting down and wishing that he had a phone. 

It was weird, watching everyone walking by, normal college kids living their normal lives, ignoring what was going on around them. They were lucky, and he’d be lying if he didn’t say that he wasn’t jealous. 

…

Logan found Virgil still sitting on the bench about a half hour later. He joined him, saying nothing and they both people watched in silence.

It was Virgil who spoke up first.

“Can we go home?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look, when I started writing 'Oh my gosh, they were roommates' I was not expecting to carry it past one book and here we are, at the end of the second book with a third into opening stages of editing!
> 
> I just want to thank you all for supporting me over the past bit of writing this and I can assure you that [TITLE REDACTED] will be out soon!
> 
> consider joining the discord while you wait- [Here it is.. come yell at me, there's four of us currently](https://discord.gg/kFZCXg)
> 
> (yes the ending is unsatisfying-that's the point)


End file.
